I'm with the news, dude
August 7, 2017 7:26 PM Subscribe
This is the future we deserve.
posted by schmod at 7:43 PM on August 7, 2017 [8 favorites]
posted by schmod at 7:43 PM on August 7, 2017 [8 favorites]
"DUDE!"
posted by crazy with stars at 7:56 PM on August 7, 2017 [1 favorite]
posted by crazy with stars at 7:56 PM on August 7, 2017 [1 favorite]
"The driver's seating area is configured to make the driver less visible within the vehicle, while still allowing him or her the ability to safely monitor and respond to surroundings," a statement from the institute sayGoogle doesn't feel compelled to disguise the ride-along engineers monitoring their driverless cars in Mountain View. WTF NoVa? Trying to frighten the rabble?
posted by Rash at 8:00 PM on August 7, 2017 [1 favorite]
Tesla: there's something we need to come clean about regarding Autopilot Mode.
posted by sebastienbailard at 8:00 PM on August 7, 2017 [17 favorites]
posted by sebastienbailard at 8:00 PM on August 7, 2017 [17 favorites]
@PaulBlu: Congrats to Reince Priebus on his new job!
posted by RobotVoodooPower at 8:12 PM on August 7, 2017 [19 favorites]
posted by RobotVoodooPower at 8:12 PM on August 7, 2017 [19 favorites]
This is like Rampo's "The Human Chair," carried a bit too far, and, if you've read that story, you have an idea of what too far is.
posted by GenjiandProust at 8:13 PM on August 7, 2017 [2 favorites]
posted by GenjiandProust at 8:13 PM on August 7, 2017 [2 favorites]
This is probably how Calvin's dad explained self-driving cars to him.
posted by FJT at 8:19 PM on August 7, 2017 [16 favorites]
posted by FJT at 8:19 PM on August 7, 2017 [16 favorites]
the centre cannot hold;
Mere anarchy is loosed upon the world,
The blood-dimmed tide is loosed, and everywhere
The ceremony of innocence is drowned
posted by mcmile at 8:22 PM on August 7, 2017 [5 favorites]
Mere anarchy is loosed upon the world,
The blood-dimmed tide is loosed, and everywhere
The ceremony of innocence is drowned
posted by mcmile at 8:22 PM on August 7, 2017 [5 favorites]
There's nothing you can do for him. He's more car seat than man, now.
posted by TheWhiteSkull at 8:28 PM on August 7, 2017 [43 favorites]
posted by TheWhiteSkull at 8:28 PM on August 7, 2017 [43 favorites]
I dunno about "Safely monitor and respond to surroundings." Can the driver really do a shoulder check of the blind spot without being spotted? The hands are down at 4 and 7 when they belong at 10 and 2. And apparently the guy runs red lights.
posted by If only I had a penguin... at 8:29 PM on August 7, 2017 [3 favorites]
posted by If only I had a penguin... at 8:29 PM on August 7, 2017 [3 favorites]
STOP ALL THE DOWNLOADIN'
posted by indubitable at 8:32 PM on August 7, 2017 [6 favorites]
posted by indubitable at 8:32 PM on August 7, 2017 [6 favorites]
I am guffawing in a restaurant.
posted by delight at 8:33 PM on August 7, 2017 [2 favorites]
posted by delight at 8:33 PM on August 7, 2017 [2 favorites]
Google doesn't feel compelled to disguise the ride-along engineers monitoring their driverless cars in Mountain View. WTF NoVa? Trying to frighten the rabble?
"Normal looking van is actually driverless" doesn't make for a compelling headline.
posted by Mr.Encyclopedia at 8:33 PM on August 7, 2017
"Normal looking van is actually driverless" doesn't make for a compelling headline.
posted by Mr.Encyclopedia at 8:33 PM on August 7, 2017
I don't think it's actually a driverless car at all? I bet they are doing some kind of study about people's reactions to driverless cars.
posted by quaking fajita at 8:38 PM on August 7, 2017 [7 favorites]
posted by quaking fajita at 8:38 PM on August 7, 2017 [7 favorites]
Halloween inspiration.
posted by delight at 8:38 PM on August 7, 2017 [1 favorite]
posted by delight at 8:38 PM on August 7, 2017 [1 favorite]
I, for one, hope all reporters now sign off their reports with "I'm with the news, dude."
posted by zachlipton at 8:41 PM on August 7, 2017 [17 favorites]
posted by zachlipton at 8:41 PM on August 7, 2017 [17 favorites]
One of my former colleague's uncle drove KITT from Knight Rider while wearing a similar bucket seat disguise.
posted by infinitewindow at 8:50 PM on August 7, 2017 [5 favorites]
posted by infinitewindow at 8:50 PM on August 7, 2017 [5 favorites]
Come on. Every single one of us. At one point another in our lives, we have all wanted to do exactly this.
posted by vverse23 at 8:54 PM on August 7, 2017 [6 favorites]
posted by vverse23 at 8:54 PM on August 7, 2017 [6 favorites]
This is the future we deserve.
this is indeed the future i want, not the one with the resurgence of white nationalism and the casino fish inexplicably being online
posted by poffin boffin at 8:57 PM on August 7, 2017 [17 favorites]
this is indeed the future i want, not the one with the resurgence of white nationalism and the casino fish inexplicably being online
posted by poffin boffin at 8:57 PM on August 7, 2017 [17 favorites]
Surely some disruption is at hand;
Surely the Driverless Car is at hand.
The Driverless Car! Hardly are those words out
When a vast image out of Time Magazine
Troubles my sight: Somewhere in the lanes of the freeway
A shape with a car-seat body and the head of a man,
A gaze blank and pitiless as the headlights,
Is moving its slow wheels, while all about it
Reel shadows of the indignant commuter cars.
The darkness drops again; but now I know
That twenty minutes of fitful sleep
Were vexed to nightmare by a rotating laser,
And what sleek beast, its hour come round at last,
Slouches towards Arlington to be born?
posted by sfenders at 8:57 PM on August 7, 2017 [26 favorites]
Surely the Driverless Car is at hand.
The Driverless Car! Hardly are those words out
When a vast image out of Time Magazine
Troubles my sight: Somewhere in the lanes of the freeway
A shape with a car-seat body and the head of a man,
A gaze blank and pitiless as the headlights,
Is moving its slow wheels, while all about it
Reel shadows of the indignant commuter cars.
The darkness drops again; but now I know
That twenty minutes of fitful sleep
Were vexed to nightmare by a rotating laser,
And what sleek beast, its hour come round at last,
Slouches towards Arlington to be born?
posted by sfenders at 8:57 PM on August 7, 2017 [26 favorites]
we have all wanted to do exactly this
one time i disguised myself as a bean bag chair (that screamed and grabbed when someone tried to sit) to terrify my extremely stoned roommates so yes this car seat thing is indeed living the dream
posted by poffin boffin at 8:58 PM on August 7, 2017 [48 favorites]
one time i disguised myself as a bean bag chair (that screamed and grabbed when someone tried to sit) to terrify my extremely stoned roommates so yes this car seat thing is indeed living the dream
posted by poffin boffin at 8:58 PM on August 7, 2017 [48 favorites]
How do we know the person in the seat-suit is actually a dude? This is lazy journalism at its worst.
posted by Slarty Bartfast at 9:04 PM on August 7, 2017 [4 favorites]
posted by Slarty Bartfast at 9:04 PM on August 7, 2017 [4 favorites]
So I mean yes this future is really shitty but then car seat man hybrids appear and the high weirdness of it all brings like one little glimmer of joy. Like Puddles Pity Party on America's Got Talent.
posted by We'll all float on okay at 9:05 PM on August 7, 2017 [3 favorites]
posted by We'll all float on okay at 9:05 PM on August 7, 2017 [3 favorites]
Wait, so you guys don't have a dude living in your car seat? I thought they just came with new cars now.
Should I be worried?
posted by dephlogisticated at 9:30 PM on August 7, 2017 [4 favorites]
Should I be worried?
posted by dephlogisticated at 9:30 PM on August 7, 2017 [4 favorites]
Is it possible that those are mechanical hands?
posted by justsomebodythatyouusedtoknow at 9:34 PM on August 7, 2017
posted by justsomebodythatyouusedtoknow at 9:34 PM on August 7, 2017
For science! (actual nature of the science and its utility not disclosed)
posted by zachlipton at 10:07 PM on August 7, 2017 [2 favorites]
posted by zachlipton at 10:07 PM on August 7, 2017 [2 favorites]
I have mentioned this before but the single greatest thing about owning an imported right hand drive vehicle is having my dog ride shotgun and watching the double takes in passing cars.
posted by mannequito at 10:16 PM on August 7, 2017 [42 favorites]
posted by mannequito at 10:16 PM on August 7, 2017 [42 favorites]
my nayme is dude
and wen I drive
I make news krews
look well alive
I hit the rode
in urban street
no wun seez me
I dress like seet
posted by the duck by the oboe at 11:36 PM on August 7, 2017 [32 favorites]
and wen I drive
I make news krews
look well alive
I hit the rode
in urban street
no wun seez me
I dress like seet
posted by the duck by the oboe at 11:36 PM on August 7, 2017 [32 favorites]
Oh, yeah, the burqas.
That caused quite the ruckus in Europe, it seems.
Noone could agree whether the burqas are blue or white/gold!
posted by sour cream at 2:46 AM on August 8, 2017 [5 favorites]
That caused quite the ruckus in Europe, it seems.
Noone could agree whether the burqas are blue or white/gold!
posted by sour cream at 2:46 AM on August 8, 2017 [5 favorites]
You all laugh, but that's almost certainly the first step in how we got to this.
posted by Mchelly at 4:15 AM on August 8, 2017 [3 favorites]
posted by Mchelly at 4:15 AM on August 8, 2017 [3 favorites]
I Am the Pretty Thing That Drives in the Van
posted by robocop is bleeding at 5:45 AM on August 8, 2017 [2 favorites]
posted by robocop is bleeding at 5:45 AM on August 8, 2017 [2 favorites]
I knew that some fancy cars came with massaging seats as an option, but I didn't realize that was done manually.
posted by Dip Flash at 5:52 AM on August 8, 2017
posted by Dip Flash at 5:52 AM on August 8, 2017
They're heated, too, at a perfect 98.6°F.
posted by lharmon at 6:01 AM on August 8, 2017 [3 favorites]
posted by lharmon at 6:01 AM on August 8, 2017 [3 favorites]
You all laugh, but that's almost certainly the first step in how we got to this.
Before the invention of the biomechanical car, there was this.
posted by acb at 6:54 AM on August 8, 2017 [1 favorite]
Before the invention of the biomechanical car, there was this.
posted by acb at 6:54 AM on August 8, 2017 [1 favorite]
Assign this crack investigative reporter to discover the evil genius wearing the Trump-suit.
posted by sammyo at 7:05 AM on August 8, 2017
posted by sammyo at 7:05 AM on August 8, 2017
Adam Tuss ✔ @AdamTussI have no idea how these people got their driver wedged into their seat, or why.
This is one of the strangest things I've ever seen @nbcwashington @ARLnowDOTcom
posted by ricochet biscuit at 9:02 AM on August 8, 2017 [1 favorite]
An ex-friend of mine had an old International Scout 80 that was set up for right hand drive (mail truck).
It was fun to go to the left side drive-thru at Rally's (for those unfamiliar, Rally's has drive thru lanes on both sides of the building). The left side is usually for people with passengers - order by the driver, and delivery through the passenger window.
"What the hell kinda car is that, with you sitting up in my face!?!" said one attendant.
I told her the car is from Colorado, and she seemed to accept that answer.
posted by notsnot at 9:05 AM on August 8, 2017 [4 favorites]
It was fun to go to the left side drive-thru at Rally's (for those unfamiliar, Rally's has drive thru lanes on both sides of the building). The left side is usually for people with passengers - order by the driver, and delivery through the passenger window.
"What the hell kinda car is that, with you sitting up in my face!?!" said one attendant.
I told her the car is from Colorado, and she seemed to accept that answer.
posted by notsnot at 9:05 AM on August 8, 2017 [4 favorites]
"It's from Barcelona."
posted by darkstar at 9:42 AM on August 8, 2017 [1 favorite]
posted by darkstar at 9:42 AM on August 8, 2017 [1 favorite]
Wait, 8 and 4 is the new positioning for hands when driving? I find that to be abysmally uncomfortable, but I'm 6'1 and driving a '94 Mazda Miata so that could just be a size issue with my car, but dang!
posted by gucci mane at 9:47 AM on August 8, 2017 [1 favorite]
posted by gucci mane at 9:47 AM on August 8, 2017 [1 favorite]
I find that to be abysmally uncomfortable, but I'm 6'1 and driving a '94 Mazda Miata so that could just be a size issue with my car, but dang!
How on earth do you fit? Granted I am a bit taller, but the one time I tried to sit in a Miata (I was hanging out in a showroom while a friend talked to the salesperson) I literally could not get my legs into the footwell. My knees would have had to bend in the reverse direction.
posted by Dip Flash at 6:15 AM on August 9, 2017 [1 favorite]
How on earth do you fit? Granted I am a bit taller, but the one time I tried to sit in a Miata (I was hanging out in a showroom while a friend talked to the salesperson) I literally could not get my legs into the footwell. My knees would have had to bend in the reverse direction.
posted by Dip Flash at 6:15 AM on August 9, 2017 [1 favorite]
A friend of mine got into the biggest argument in his marriage when he told his wife (in reference to their Miata) that he didn't think she could fit in the trunk.
posted by Mchelly at 6:19 AM on August 9, 2017 [2 favorites]
posted by Mchelly at 6:19 AM on August 9, 2017 [2 favorites]
I can fit into the car decently fine, but it is a bit of a squish! It's really nice though, only got 67,000 miles on it thus far, but I need to get the top replaced because the rear window is coming off by the threads.
posted by gucci mane at 8:42 AM on August 9, 2017
posted by gucci mane at 8:42 AM on August 9, 2017
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posted by miyabo at 7:43 PM on August 7, 2017 [7 favorites]