What if a drug could give you all the benefits of a workout?
November 4, 2017 12:34 AM Subscribe
Indeed, one of the most significant challenges facing anyone who wants to develop an exercise pill is that the biological processes unleashed by physical activity are still relatively mysterious. For all the known benefits of a short loop around the park, scientists are, for the most part, incapable of explaining how exercise does what it does. [slNewYorker]
I find CalisthenicaⓇ more effective, but FitrexⓇ has less side effects.
posted by fairmettle at 1:05 AM on November 4, 2017 [2 favorites]
posted by fairmettle at 1:05 AM on November 4, 2017 [2 favorites]
Ask your doctor if BrosephⓇ is right for you.
posted by BigHeartedGuy at 1:29 AM on November 4, 2017 [26 favorites]
posted by BigHeartedGuy at 1:29 AM on November 4, 2017 [26 favorites]
I love running, so I don't think I would stop if I could get my fitness in a pill, but who knows.
I heard a joke from an old alcoholic about a miracle pill that cures alcoholism. He said he would gladly take it so then he could get drunk every day and not worry about it being a problem.
posted by Literaryhero at 1:58 AM on November 4, 2017 [17 favorites]
I heard a joke from an old alcoholic about a miracle pill that cures alcoholism. He said he would gladly take it so then he could get drunk every day and not worry about it being a problem.
posted by Literaryhero at 1:58 AM on November 4, 2017 [17 favorites]
Robin Williams told this version: they invent a pill that cures alcoholism. And the alcoholic says at once, hey, what if I take two of them?
posted by thelonius at 2:45 AM on November 4, 2017 [22 favorites]
posted by thelonius at 2:45 AM on November 4, 2017 [22 favorites]
What if you could take a pill that gave you the benefits of being on Metafilter?
posted by Obscure Reference at 5:31 AM on November 4, 2017 [10 favorites]
posted by Obscure Reference at 5:31 AM on November 4, 2017 [10 favorites]
doing what i love best, flexing at myself in the mirror while dancing to boney m's rasputin
Wait... isn’t this... what... everyone does on slow evenings?
Oh, shit.
posted by GenjiandProust at 5:39 AM on November 4, 2017 [1 favorite]
Wait... isn’t this... what... everyone does on slow evenings?
Oh, shit.
posted by GenjiandProust at 5:39 AM on November 4, 2017 [1 favorite]
I never thought it would happen to me, but I regained my youth and my happiness! Just ask my husband.
posted by telegraph at 5:55 AM on November 4, 2017
posted by telegraph at 5:55 AM on November 4, 2017
What if you could take a pill that gave you the benefits of being on Metafilter?
stop providing ammo for the drug warriors dammit
posted by lalochezia at 6:26 AM on November 4, 2017
stop providing ammo for the drug warriors dammit
posted by lalochezia at 6:26 AM on November 4, 2017
i would immediately OD on them and die doing what i love best, flexing at myself in the mirror while dancing to boney m's rasputin
You would not be the first to meet your end in such a glorious way my friend.
posted by vorpal bunny at 6:40 AM on November 4, 2017 [1 favorite]
You would not be the first to meet your end in such a glorious way my friend.
posted by vorpal bunny at 6:40 AM on November 4, 2017 [1 favorite]
Hm, even if it works exactly the same way on humans without any ill effects whatsoever, it's still not gonna replace exercise.
posted by inconstant at 8:27 AM on November 4, 2017 [1 favorite]
they had increased their endurance [...] by as much as seventy-five per cent. Meanwhile, their waistlines [...] and their body-fat percentage shrank; their insulin resistance came down; and their muscle-composition ratio shifted toward so-called slow-twitch fibresLike, they specifically call out astronauts and elderly, fracture-prone folks as populations that could benefit from the drug, but nothing in the experimental results as described in the article sounds like it would mitigate bone loss/prevent osteoporosis. Nor is it said to do anything about coordination, flexibility, or circulation.
posted by inconstant at 8:27 AM on November 4, 2017 [1 favorite]
I used to chain-smoke cigarettes until my heart pounded, which simulates a good CV workout without having to spend ten bucks a month on ellipticals. Do these "exercise pills" also maybe get you a little high, and taste good?
posted by Cookiebastard at 8:50 AM on November 4, 2017 [1 favorite]
posted by Cookiebastard at 8:50 AM on November 4, 2017 [1 favorite]
A couple of years ago, I read the book The Sports Gene, which is much better than it sounds, since it looks at all sorts of possibilities about genetic factors related to muscle type and fitness and so on, as well as how they interact with culture. The upshot is: there is no single gene, obviously, and it's really hard to untangle these things.
One of the things I found most interesting was research that shows that not everyone gets the benefits of aerobic exercise. Most of us, if we start doing aerobic exercise, develop the capacity to do more of it: we can do it longer, our bodies make more efficient use of the oxygen we take in, etc. But there are apparently some very interesting studies that, unexpectedly, showed that there are a minority of people for whom this does not happen. They can follow the same exercise regimen as others, and never develop the capacity to do more of it.
posted by Orlop at 8:59 AM on November 4, 2017 [9 favorites]
One of the things I found most interesting was research that shows that not everyone gets the benefits of aerobic exercise. Most of us, if we start doing aerobic exercise, develop the capacity to do more of it: we can do it longer, our bodies make more efficient use of the oxygen we take in, etc. But there are apparently some very interesting studies that, unexpectedly, showed that there are a minority of people for whom this does not happen. They can follow the same exercise regimen as others, and never develop the capacity to do more of it.
posted by Orlop at 8:59 AM on November 4, 2017 [9 favorites]
What if you could take a pill that gave you the benefits of being on Metafilter?
You get benefits?
posted by srboisvert at 11:11 AM on November 4, 2017 [3 favorites]
You get benefits?
posted by srboisvert at 11:11 AM on November 4, 2017 [3 favorites]
Wait... isn’t this... what... everyone does on slow evenings?
it's less hilarious bc greg can't react to my subcommenting him.
posted by poffin boffin at 11:54 AM on November 4, 2017 [2 favorites]
it's less hilarious bc greg can't react to my subcommenting him.
posted by poffin boffin at 11:54 AM on November 4, 2017 [2 favorites]
I've settled on weight lifting as my exercise of choice. Lots of benefits for the amount of time I have to put into it.
I like the benefits and I don't mind all the sore muscles. For the most part it's the actual lifting part that I have a love/hate relationship with. They're just so heavy. It doesn't take a ton of time and I'm only doing three or five sets of five reps but it always feels like it takes forever and OMG I have to do another set still?! But it's still satisfying when I get them done and pulling/pushing ever increasing weights around feels powerful or something.
If I could take a pill that left me with the benefit and soreness I'd be all over it. I'd still lift, just not as hard or as often or something. Especially since this seems to emphasize endurance and cardio. It sounds promising but I still wouldn't start taking it until it's mechanisms are more well understood and it's safety is more certain. Most of the nutrition and fitness industry exists because the mechanisms behind diet and exercise are not well understood.
posted by VTX at 12:05 PM on November 4, 2017
I like the benefits and I don't mind all the sore muscles. For the most part it's the actual lifting part that I have a love/hate relationship with. They're just so heavy. It doesn't take a ton of time and I'm only doing three or five sets of five reps but it always feels like it takes forever and OMG I have to do another set still?! But it's still satisfying when I get them done and pulling/pushing ever increasing weights around feels powerful or something.
If I could take a pill that left me with the benefit and soreness I'd be all over it. I'd still lift, just not as hard or as often or something. Especially since this seems to emphasize endurance and cardio. It sounds promising but I still wouldn't start taking it until it's mechanisms are more well understood and it's safety is more certain. Most of the nutrition and fitness industry exists because the mechanisms behind diet and exercise are not well understood.
posted by VTX at 12:05 PM on November 4, 2017
Orlop, that is an interesting finding, isn’t it?
Science is smack dab in the middle of the era of genomics, and in the end we are going to find that there is variability about damn near everything—including a wide range of variability in otherwise normal and healthy metabolism. Mark my word.
posted by Sublimity at 1:32 PM on November 4, 2017 [1 favorite]
Science is smack dab in the middle of the era of genomics, and in the end we are going to find that there is variability about damn near everything—including a wide range of variability in otherwise normal and healthy metabolism. Mark my word.
posted by Sublimity at 1:32 PM on November 4, 2017 [1 favorite]
For the most part it's the actual lifting part that I have a love/hate relationship with. They're just so heavy.
The really annoying part is it’s the weight lowering, and not the weight lifting, that generates the most benefits of the exercise.
posted by andrewdoull at 1:38 PM on November 4, 2017 [1 favorite]
The really annoying part is it’s the weight lowering, and not the weight lifting, that generates the most benefits of the exercise.
posted by andrewdoull at 1:38 PM on November 4, 2017 [1 favorite]
How's that work?
The part that I like is that it's important to get enough sleep because that's when your body does most of it's muscle building.
What happens in the gym is more about breaking muscles. Are you saying that damage that stimulates muscle growth/strengthening/whatever mostly happens when lowering a weight rather than lifting it?
posted by VTX at 7:23 PM on November 4, 2017
The part that I like is that it's important to get enough sleep because that's when your body does most of it's muscle building.
What happens in the gym is more about breaking muscles. Are you saying that damage that stimulates muscle growth/strengthening/whatever mostly happens when lowering a weight rather than lifting it?
posted by VTX at 7:23 PM on November 4, 2017
wok 25 killomeaters par dag
en yor most expensive cloths
works every tim
i hav never even died wunss yet this hole tim av bin alive en iss bin forever alreddy aggenn
posted by LeviQayin at 11:24 PM on November 4, 2017
en yor most expensive cloths
works every tim
i hav never even died wunss yet this hole tim av bin alive en iss bin forever alreddy aggenn
posted by LeviQayin at 11:24 PM on November 4, 2017
I used to chain-smoke cigarettes until my heart pounded, which simulates a good CV workout without having to spend ten bucks a month on ellipticals. Do these "exercise pills" also maybe get you a little high, and taste good?
Try amphetamines; less cancer risk, same racing heartbeat.
posted by leotrotsky at 5:06 AM on November 5, 2017 [2 favorites]
Try amphetamines; less cancer risk, same racing heartbeat.
posted by leotrotsky at 5:06 AM on November 5, 2017 [2 favorites]
There's no mystery to exercise, especially for the older adult... it comes down to use it or lose it.
posted by Artful Codger at 3:04 PM on November 5, 2017
posted by Artful Codger at 3:04 PM on November 5, 2017
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posted by poffin boffin at 12:57 AM on November 4, 2017 [52 favorites]