Octopus Holdings
August 5, 2019 12:33 PM   Subscribe

What can an octopus hold?

A book!
Silverware!
A computer!
It's turtles all the way down!

In related news, I think this cat is hungry.
And this bee has a stack of hearts for you.
posted by faethverity (49 comments total) 23 users marked this as a favorite
 
Is that first link supposed to do something? It looks interactive, but it doesn't seem to actually interact. (Chrome/Win10)
posted by jacquilynne at 12:44 PM on August 5, 2019 [2 favorites]


Hey, look, a house can hold an octopus!
posted by grumpybear69 at 12:58 PM on August 5, 2019 [1 favorite]


Looks like you add what they hold as a sub-directory, so http://emoji.octopus.holdings/cat. And it stacks.
posted by linux at 12:58 PM on August 5, 2019


Hold my beer
posted by Orange Dinosaur Slide at 12:59 PM on August 5, 2019 [4 favorites]


okay, the fun part is putting "/object" at the end and seeing if it's in the octopus' vocabulary... apple and orange are (so it knows the difference) as are peach, pear, pineapple and banana. Knife and spoon are, but not fork or spork. You can give the octopus a gun or a bomb, but be careful.

But anyone who has been exposed to "tenticle porn" will be either relieved or disappointed at some of the things it won't hold.
posted by oneswellfoop at 1:03 PM on August 5, 2019 [1 favorite]


Octopus Hodor
posted by oneswellfoop at 1:04 PM on August 5, 2019 [2 favorites]




also
posted by Orange Dinosaur Slide at 1:07 PM on August 5, 2019 [1 favorite]


Octopus Anathema!
posted by capricorn at 1:09 PM on August 5, 2019 [2 favorites]


I broke it
posted by achrise at 1:09 PM on August 5, 2019 [6 favorites]


okay, the fun part is putting "/object" at the end and seeing if it's in the octopus' vocabulary

I think you could get an idea of what's possible by looking at Wikipedia's list of emoji, where the visual emoji are then translated into what they are from Wikipedia's URL parsing.

More or less ... no octopus sled (🛷) ... but here it is! So if you want to directly put in emoji, then you can go crazy (within the limits of emoji).
posted by filthy light thief at 1:09 PM on August 5, 2019 [1 favorite]


MetaFilter: you can go crazy (within the limits of emoji)
posted by hippybear at 1:14 PM on August 5, 2019


Thank god for limits!
posted by hippybear at 1:15 PM on August 5, 2019


I say, I say, I say, what can an octopus hold?

Its breath!

(can't get wind-blowing-face emoji to work, sigh!)
posted by I'm always feeling, Blue at 1:16 PM on August 5, 2019 [2 favorites]




I'm always feeling, Blue, Like this?
posted by faethverity at 1:20 PM on August 5, 2019 [1 favorite]


Hey, look, a house can hold an octopus!

Yes, but an octopus can hold a house holding an octopus!
posted by hanov3r at 1:22 PM on August 5, 2019


anarchist octopus
posted by Cash4Lead at 1:25 PM on August 5, 2019 [2 favorites]


I never knew I needed a badger emoji until now.
posted by sacrifix at 1:25 PM on August 5, 2019 [1 favorite]


badgers
posted by faethverity at 1:29 PM on August 5, 2019 [7 favorites]


How would pants wear pants? (you can change the emoji set mid-query – see here)
posted by oulipian at 1:33 PM on August 5, 2019 [5 favorites]


Hey Hollywood, call me: 1, 2
posted by Orange Dinosaur Slide at 1:39 PM on August 5, 2019 [4 favorites]


Hold up! That's brilliant faethverity, it didn't even occur to me to use the actual emoji!

The dancer's good value too, e.g. Girl power or holding up a bank
posted by I'm always feeling, Blue at 1:39 PM on August 5, 2019 [2 favorites]


stacked octopus (pi)
posted by oneswellfoop at 1:43 PM on August 5, 2019 [2 favorites]




An octopus can also hold its own at Pac-Man
posted by I'm always feeling, Blue at 1:59 PM on August 5, 2019




stacked octopus (pi)

You found the README!

This post is such a lovely surprise!
Goals I didn't know I had:
✅ Featured on MetaFilter
Can we add a mefisown tag to the post?

I think y'all have found most of the quirks already :)

If someone has an SVG of the MetaFilter favicon and the relevant folks approve, I would be delighted to add it to the mapping so octopus.holdings/mefi works.
posted by jdherg at 2:06 PM on August 5, 2019 [23 favorites]


Discworld.
posted by me3dia at 2:07 PM on August 5, 2019 [7 favorites]


`/random` seems be giving it an internal server error :/
posted by silentbicycle at 2:11 PM on August 5, 2019


`/random` seems be giving it an internal server error :/

Fixed! Thanks for the heads-up :)
posted by jdherg at 2:30 PM on August 5, 2019 [1 favorite]


Tag for mefisown added! Check!
posted by faethverity at 2:32 PM on August 5, 2019 [1 favorite]


It's not an octopus, it's not a heptapod. That's very clearly a hexapus.

I quite like this one though, he's aggressively adorable, as per Hank Green.
(Those are supposed to be the ear-like fins, but, there's not an emoji for "adorable ear like fin".)
posted by nat at 2:39 PM on August 5, 2019 [1 favorite]


Octopus, no! Don't hold the knife that way!. That's how you become sushi!
posted by merriment at 3:07 PM on August 5, 2019 [3 favorites]




I'd like to be....
posted by linux at 4:31 PM on August 5, 2019 [3 favorites]


How do I kill the 30-50 feral hogs that run into my yard within 3-5 minutes while my small octopus plays?

Pro-tip: all the pigs are all lined up
posted by I'm always feeling, Blue at 4:33 PM on August 5, 2019 [1 favorite]


Pro-tip: all the pigs are all lined up

And doesn't it make you feel better?
posted by hippybear at 4:55 PM on August 5, 2019 [2 favorites]


Tag for mefisown added! Check!

Yay, thanks! And thank you for posting this in the first place!
posted by jdherg at 5:18 PM on August 5, 2019 [1 favorite]


Octopus, no! Don't hold the knife that way!.

They do better with a dagger.
posted by wreckingball at 6:04 PM on August 5, 2019 [2 favorites]


No, this is an Octopus Hold.
posted by delfin at 6:45 PM on August 5, 2019


What can an octopus hold?

In the same vein as the question of where an 800-pound gorilla sits, I'm thinking with eight highly flexible arms with suckers on all of them, "Anything it wants to."
posted by ricochet biscuit at 7:17 PM on August 5, 2019 [1 favorite]


Pumpkin version from my carving party last year!
posted by vasi at 7:40 PM on August 5, 2019 [2 favorites]


Upon discovering that there is in fact no dildo emoji.
posted by aspersioncast at 7:46 PM on August 5, 2019


Sea creatures!
posted by just_ducky at 9:04 PM on August 5, 2019 [1 favorite]


just_ducky this actually reminds me of one of my favourite children's book called "Bloub Bloub Bloub" that has a very similar scene.
posted by motdiem2 at 2:12 AM on August 6, 2019


OK, but should scientists give them bones?
posted by Rallon at 6:42 AM on August 6, 2019 [1 favorite]


30 - 50 feral hogs
posted by Lipstick Thespian at 2:17 PM on August 6, 2019


Best. Holding. Company. Ever.
posted by oneswellfoop at 4:36 PM on August 6, 2019


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