Producing sperm on the backs of mice.

August 14, 2002 9:20 PM

Producing sperm on the backs of mice. Well, the back of a laboratory mouse doesn't do anything - it just sits back there. Might as well put it to good use.
posted by percine (16 comments total)

eh brutha... the end is near. It HAS to be.
posted by Witty at 9:23 PM on August 14, 2002

the back of a laboratory mouse doesn't do anything - it just sits back there

huh? sits back there? i thought we all knew that the back of a mouse is already reserved for human ears...
posted by popkick at 9:33 PM on August 14, 2002

"But if it arises in animals and they breed in the wild, zoonotic and genetic diseases could take hold and wreak havoc on a population"

If?

"There are a lot of potential caveats and questions to be answered... if we do get sperm, what do we do with them..."

This is why these people need to just stop... just stop.
posted by Witty at 9:33 PM on August 14, 2002

the backs of laboratory mice are a vast untapped resource in our war against terrorism, support growing-things-on-the-backs-of-mice-research, or you're helping the terrorists!
posted by rhyax at 9:41 PM on August 14, 2002

NOT IN MY BACK YARD!
posted by Witty at 9:43 PM on August 14, 2002

This and they'll be super strong. Man..
posted by slipperywhenwet at 10:02 PM on August 14, 2002

i haven't read the article yet but if anyone needs any sperm...
posted by fuq at 10:26 PM on August 14, 2002

Any day now they'll come out with the super-intelligent, super-strong mice with sperm-secreting human ears on their backs. It's the next logical step as far as I can tell.
posted by mogwai at 11:04 PM on August 14, 2002

I'm going to go out on a limb here and say that the headline to this post would be a damn sight more disgusting and yet funnier if it read Producing sperm onto the backs of mice.

"Hold still, you little devils!"
posted by mr_crash_davis at 11:13 PM on August 14, 2002

...and the placebo group had warm yogurt poured on their backs.
posted by KevinSkomsvold at 11:31 PM on August 14, 2002

Keep your parlour tricks to yourself Kevin :P
posted by Witty at 11:33 PM on August 14, 2002

Mouse bukkake. Ewww.
posted by aeschenkarnos at 1:01 AM on August 15, 2002

I'd like to point out that porn stars have had this technology for years, they just haven't used mice. Not that I've seen, anyway.
posted by yerfatma at 4:51 AM on August 15, 2002

To quote Jon Stewart, "it's truly amazing what scientists can achieve when no one tells them to stop."

originally uttered for the remote controlled rat
posted by teradome at 4:58 AM on August 15, 2002

you can also grow ears on the backs of rats :) it's art!

also instead of testicles i think it'd be cool if i just had a couple mice down there running around my nut sack. like i could have a pouch to keep em in when i needed them, but other than that, you know, they'd be free to hang at the exercise wheel and stuff.
posted by kliuless at 6:04 AM on August 15, 2002

a friend of mine said once "they can make ears grow on the backs of rats... and still, they can't come out with a reliable, hassle-free weight loss solution"

amen
posted by ultradian at 7:28 AM on August 15, 2002