Fully aquatic whale-rats. Praying mantises the size of dogs.

October 21, 2021 4:55 PM

The animals that may exist in a million years, imagined by biologists.
posted by Lyme Drop (13 comments total)

I love this kind of thing. See also After Man for an earlier take on a similar idea.
posted by AndrewStephens at 5:09 PM on October 21, 2021 [2 favorites]

No mention of After Man?
posted by tftio at 5:16 PM on October 21, 2021 [3 favorites]

Interesting ideas, presented with suitable caution.

I find myself wondering if the earth will be stuck with some kind of super-intelligent ape (i.e. our descendants) for a long time. We've been transformative in the way that I'm guessing ants were, with everything else having to adjust to us the way that everything smaller than an inch (and many things larger than an inch) had to adjust to ants. Have we reached the "you're stuck with us now" point that ants reached?
posted by clawsoon at 5:18 PM on October 21, 2021

Much more likely that fungi will be by far the most common lifeform on this planet once the Anthropocene goes where it's going, but I don't see a single mention of that kingdom in the article. They can survive much more than plants and animals can.
posted by Sheydem-tants at 5:20 PM on October 21, 2021 [2 favorites]

GIGANTIC MANTIS is my new post-prog-rock band name
posted by Fiasco da Gama at 5:26 PM on October 21, 2021 [2 favorites]

Yeah just wait until we decide it's necessary to adapt some of the amorphous and curiously cold-resistant shoggoths to land life; a thing the Old Ones had formerly been reluctant to do.
posted by 7segment at 5:34 PM on October 21, 2021 [1 favorite]

As a child I was fascinated by the The Future is Wild, which had a similar premise.
posted by rishabguha at 6:19 PM on October 21, 2021

Neato. Love speculative biology. Thanks for posting.
posted by Don.Kinsayder at 6:22 PM on October 21, 2021

GIGANTIC MANTIS is my new post-prog-rock band name
Got a present for ya. Amon Tobin - Four Ton Mantis
posted by bartleby at 7:43 PM on October 21, 2021 [2 favorites]

In the far, far future, rodents are especially well poised to thrive if mammal species continue to go extinct.

"This is Willard and his friend Ben."
I'll posit the killer cockroaches from 'Damnation Alley' could defeat the rodent triumvirate with machine pistols.
posted by clavdivs at 9:10 PM on October 21, 2021

Sorry everyone, but we covered and solved the problem of the large mantis back in 1957.
posted by vrakatar at 9:32 PM on October 21, 2021 [1 favorite]

Crabs? Aren't all the beasts crab-like? Were we misinformed?
posted by CCBC at 10:47 PM on October 21, 2021 [1 favorite]

My 10 year old self asks why they allowed the illustrator to draw rat's tail to wiggling side to side when every single other current and past aquatic mammal has a tail that flaps up & down?…is it perhaps because then it would've looked too much like a beaver?
posted by brachiopod at 5:02 AM on October 22, 2021 [3 favorites]