It’s a glorified backpack of tubes and turbines
January 22, 2022 8:46 AM Subscribe
We have jetpacks and we do not care... For decades, humans have said they want jetpacks, and for thousands of years we have said we want to fly, but do we really? Look up. The sky is empty. Dave Eggers writes in the Guardian on flying and the time he took a jetpack training course.
Yes, I'm grateful that one outcome of living through these times is that out of our misery we might experience a backlash of collectively dreaming of better things than just improved commutes. Dave Eggers has both the wealth and the time for sky leisure. We all should. We all could.
posted by lefty lucky cat at 9:17 AM on January 22, 2022 [3 favorites]
posted by lefty lucky cat at 9:17 AM on January 22, 2022 [3 favorites]
The jetpack is loud, so I promise you they heard me. But there I was, flying by on a jetpack, and they did not look up.”
probably because they f***ing hated you.
There's a future we can all get excited about. Thousands of lawnmowers zooming around overhead.
posted by philip-random at 9:18 AM on January 22, 2022 [12 favorites]
probably because they f***ing hated you.
There's a future we can all get excited about. Thousands of lawnmowers zooming around overhead.
posted by philip-random at 9:18 AM on January 22, 2022 [12 favorites]
What Imperfect said, plus, it's like the old thing about flying cars: you don't want everyone to have one, you want you to have one. 3D traffic would be worse than the 2D variety by orders of magnitude; there's literally no way for people to jet around and not have beaucoup mid-air collisions if any significant proportion of them have jetpacks. (Yeah, there's a huge volume of air above us, but most people are going to be going to specific locations, and the approaches to those will be very crowded with people going very fast.) The fantasy is that it's going to be just you and maybe Superman or Iron Man zipping around.
posted by Halloween Jack at 9:22 AM on January 22, 2022 [8 favorites]
posted by Halloween Jack at 9:22 AM on January 22, 2022 [8 favorites]
The concept of household collision insurance.
posted by y2karl at 9:26 AM on January 22, 2022 [6 favorites]
posted by y2karl at 9:26 AM on January 22, 2022 [6 favorites]
Jetpacks are a more extreme and experimental version of general aviation. You know what the accident and fatality rates are like in general aviation? Not great! Some planes are jokingly called "doctor killers" because they appeal to people who have enough money to own a fast, powerful airplane and enough overconfidence from being really good at their day job to crash it because being a pilot is hard. GA insurance rates are spiraling out of control, for a lot of reasons but partly because people keep wrecking airplanes.
So I'll excuse people if they're not enthusiastic about something that flies for 8 minutes and has no engine-out capability, no ability to glide, and no parachute.
posted by allegedly at 9:26 AM on January 22, 2022 [19 favorites]
So I'll excuse people if they're not enthusiastic about something that flies for 8 minutes and has no engine-out capability, no ability to glide, and no parachute.
posted by allegedly at 9:26 AM on January 22, 2022 [19 favorites]
I would seriously love to try a jetpack. But it's very easy to make excuses not to.
My son is interested in planes and I've been reading a lot about early aviation as a result. Those people were, not to put too fine a point on it, f*cking insane. The risks they took! Literally unbelievable. But I think life was just cheaper, then. Our appetite for risk has diminished a lot. I guess I'd do more crazy stunts if I expected I'd just die if they didn't work but the specter of permanent, expensive disability with hundreds of thousands in medical bills is too much to bear for many of us. And you can get your adrenaline rush from video games instead.
posted by potrzebie at 9:27 AM on January 22, 2022 [1 favorite]
My son is interested in planes and I've been reading a lot about early aviation as a result. Those people were, not to put too fine a point on it, f*cking insane. The risks they took! Literally unbelievable. But I think life was just cheaper, then. Our appetite for risk has diminished a lot. I guess I'd do more crazy stunts if I expected I'd just die if they didn't work but the specter of permanent, expensive disability with hundreds of thousands in medical bills is too much to bear for many of us. And you can get your adrenaline rush from video games instead.
posted by potrzebie at 9:27 AM on January 22, 2022 [1 favorite]
Here's the nut graf of the piece:
After he ducks out of the jetpack, Wesson collapses on the plastic chair next to Yancey, his face bright pink and limbs limp. He’s flown just about every kind of airplane and helicopter, but “that”, he says, “is the hardest thing I’ve ever done”.posted by Halloween Jack at 9:28 AM on January 22, 2022 [2 favorites]
I don't think flying with a jetpack would be as thrilling as riding a sportbike on a twisty road.
posted by ryanrs at 9:33 AM on January 22, 2022 [4 favorites]
posted by ryanrs at 9:33 AM on January 22, 2022 [4 favorites]
Yeah we don’t want real jetpacks. We want cartoon jetpacks that elide all the difficult, dangerous, uncomfortable, or impractical parts.
posted by aubilenon at 9:34 AM on January 22, 2022 [17 favorites]
posted by aubilenon at 9:34 AM on January 22, 2022 [17 favorites]
jokingly called "doctor killers" because they appeal to people who have enough money to own a fast, powerful airplane and enough overconfidence from being really good at their day job to crash it because being a pilot is hard.
or as I've heard it put. "Want to significantly increase your chances of being killed in plane crash? Get a pilot's license or be friends or family with someone who has one."
posted by philip-random at 9:43 AM on January 22, 2022 [3 favorites]
or as I've heard it put. "Want to significantly increase your chances of being killed in plane crash? Get a pilot's license or be friends or family with someone who has one."
posted by philip-random at 9:43 AM on January 22, 2022 [3 favorites]
Yeah we don’t want real jetpacks. We want cartoon jetpacks that elide all the difficult, dangerous, uncomfortable, or impractical parts.
There are human sized quadcopters being developed, working prototypes exist. You point where to go and computer figures out all the hard bits, autolanding, etc.
posted by Meatbomb at 10:07 AM on January 22, 2022 [1 favorite]
There are human sized quadcopters being developed, working prototypes exist. You point where to go and computer figures out all the hard bits, autolanding, etc.
posted by Meatbomb at 10:07 AM on January 22, 2022 [1 favorite]
Autopiloted human-sized quadcopters? Get back to me about a decade after car autopilots don't make stupid mistakes.
posted by seanmpuckett at 10:31 AM on January 22, 2022 [4 favorites]
posted by seanmpuckett at 10:31 AM on January 22, 2022 [4 favorites]
I only wanted a jetpack to fight Nazis and date Jennifer Connelly, and these days I can do at least one of those things without a jetpack.
posted by Gerald Bostock at 10:41 AM on January 22, 2022 [36 favorites]
posted by Gerald Bostock at 10:41 AM on January 22, 2022 [36 favorites]
Autopiloted human-sized quadcopters? Get back to me about a decade after car autopilots don't make stupid mistakes.
I did laugh at this, but most parts of aircraft autopiloting is basically a solved problem. I'd definitely trust one before I trust a self-driving car. They don't need to figure out if that solid thing in front of them is a truck going 55, a truck slamming on its brakes, or a brick wall. (Landing in a crowded area with lots of power lines maybe not.)
OTOH still not crazy about getting something whose only failure mode is "drop out of the sky like a brick." I won't get in a human driven helicopter either.
posted by mark k at 11:29 AM on January 22, 2022 [1 favorite]
I did laugh at this, but most parts of aircraft autopiloting is basically a solved problem. I'd definitely trust one before I trust a self-driving car. They don't need to figure out if that solid thing in front of them is a truck going 55, a truck slamming on its brakes, or a brick wall. (Landing in a crowded area with lots of power lines maybe not.)
OTOH still not crazy about getting something whose only failure mode is "drop out of the sky like a brick." I won't get in a human driven helicopter either.
posted by mark k at 11:29 AM on January 22, 2022 [1 favorite]
Beyond the dangers of putting on a vest made of kerosene, that 800-degree exhaust is something I'd be deathly afraid of. That would also rule out jetpack sex.
posted by They sucked his brains out! at 11:38 AM on January 22, 2022 [2 favorites]
posted by They sucked his brains out! at 11:38 AM on January 22, 2022 [2 favorites]
OTOH still not crazy about getting something whose only failure mode is "drop out of the sky like a brick." I won't get in a human driven helicopter either.
Normal helicopters don't fall out of the sky if e.g. the engine fails.
posted by ryanrs at 12:05 PM on January 22, 2022 [2 favorites]
Normal helicopters don't fall out of the sky if e.g. the engine fails.
posted by ryanrs at 12:05 PM on January 22, 2022 [2 favorites]
No interest in jetpacks, but backpack paragliders have this strong appeal. Have watched too many Tucker Gott youtubes.
(Although strapping a fan to my back is at odds with my desire to keep all my fingers and arms attached.)
posted by joeyh at 12:05 PM on January 22, 2022 [1 favorite]
(Although strapping a fan to my back is at odds with my desire to keep all my fingers and arms attached.)
posted by joeyh at 12:05 PM on January 22, 2022 [1 favorite]
If you think leaf blowers are a nuisance ... wait until jet packs are common.
posted by Termite at 12:12 PM on January 22, 2022
posted by Termite at 12:12 PM on January 22, 2022
A combination of the two then comes to mind.
posted by y2karl at 12:32 PM on January 22, 2022 [1 favorite]
posted by y2karl at 12:32 PM on January 22, 2022 [1 favorite]
Until all of our overhead utilities are moved underground, jet packs and flying cars will be useless. That’s why teleportation is the only realistic transportation mode of the future.
Meanwhile, no one rocks a jet pack like KENNY FUCKIN’ POWERS!
posted by TedW at 12:46 PM on January 22, 2022 [1 favorite]
Meanwhile, no one rocks a jet pack like KENNY FUCKIN’ POWERS!
posted by TedW at 12:46 PM on January 22, 2022 [1 favorite]
Normal helicopters don't fall out of the sky if e.g. the engine fails.
You're talking about autorotation, which is a skill that has to be practiced in order to be performed successfully. Otherwise, the chopper certainly will fall out of the sky, like anything else that isn't lighter than air.
posted by Halloween Jack at 1:07 PM on January 22, 2022 [1 favorite]
You're talking about autorotation, which is a skill that has to be practiced in order to be performed successfully. Otherwise, the chopper certainly will fall out of the sky, like anything else that isn't lighter than air.
posted by Halloween Jack at 1:07 PM on January 22, 2022 [1 favorite]
No school like the old school: 007 in Thunderball (1965).
posted by cenoxo at 1:17 PM on January 22, 2022 [2 favorites]
posted by cenoxo at 1:17 PM on January 22, 2022 [2 favorites]
A friend has a paramotor liscense, which anyone can get after taking a 14 day training course, and a paramotor, which cost about $15,000 and had to be custom-ordered from Italy. Paramotors can fly in what's called "Class G" airspace in the US, which is "completely uncontrolled" airspace. The only requirement is that you stay below about 1200 feet, and know how to take off and land safely, which needs a flat open space about 50 yards long. Other than that there's no restrictions on flights. My friend jokes about flying his paramotor to work every day, since there's a field he can land in nearby.
In short, anyone with about $20,000 dollars lying around and two weeks off from work can do this. But who has that kind of money lying around AND the appetite for risk to go flying through the air where a stalled motor or bad landing can kill you? Cars are just that slightest bit safer and easier. Maybe if the price comes down and we build an equal number of landing pads / storage lockers to the number of parking lots right now.
posted by subdee at 1:26 PM on January 22, 2022 [2 favorites]
In short, anyone with about $20,000 dollars lying around and two weeks off from work can do this. But who has that kind of money lying around AND the appetite for risk to go flying through the air where a stalled motor or bad landing can kill you? Cars are just that slightest bit safer and easier. Maybe if the price comes down and we build an equal number of landing pads / storage lockers to the number of parking lots right now.
posted by subdee at 1:26 PM on January 22, 2022 [2 favorites]
Maybe I'm just in my own bubble, but who would be all the people with time and space and excess funds to get into flying? Seems like the complaints about hobby aviation slowing down has more behind it than perhaps just "people aren't as interested in flying."
I'm always a bit surprised at the amount of people who seem to have $10k to drop on hobby stuff, but flying goes quite a bit beyond that, quickly.
It's also not quite like being into say, fancy motorcycles, which you can reasonably keep in your garage and take out easily when you feel like. No airstrip to go to, nothing to schedule.
To me this feels in the same vein of articles on why people don't garden as much, aren't as in tune with nature, don't spend as much quality time with their kids, whatever. It's like have you tried living in America in 2022?
posted by jellywerker at 1:29 PM on January 22, 2022 [1 favorite]
I'm always a bit surprised at the amount of people who seem to have $10k to drop on hobby stuff, but flying goes quite a bit beyond that, quickly.
It's also not quite like being into say, fancy motorcycles, which you can reasonably keep in your garage and take out easily when you feel like. No airstrip to go to, nothing to schedule.
To me this feels in the same vein of articles on why people don't garden as much, aren't as in tune with nature, don't spend as much quality time with their kids, whatever. It's like have you tried living in America in 2022?
posted by jellywerker at 1:29 PM on January 22, 2022 [1 favorite]
It does feel like a similar complaint to the one about how millennials are ruining the boating industry by not owning enough private boats.
My friend with the paramotor is an IBEW electrician, he's paid well for his work and often has time off between jobs. Sometimes work is just slow and you're on unemployment for months at a time before it picks up again.
posted by subdee at 1:33 PM on January 22, 2022
My friend with the paramotor is an IBEW electrician, he's paid well for his work and often has time off between jobs. Sometimes work is just slow and you're on unemployment for months at a time before it picks up again.
posted by subdee at 1:33 PM on January 22, 2022
That $20,000 can be easily amortized by making YouTube videos where you go pick up fast food.
posted by credulous at 1:36 PM on January 22, 2022
posted by credulous at 1:36 PM on January 22, 2022
I would go for a paramotor before a jetpack, it seems less dangerous and less bad for the environment. Even if the motor stalls, you're still wearing a parachute.
posted by subdee at 1:39 PM on January 22, 2022
posted by subdee at 1:39 PM on January 22, 2022
I suppose technically, you don't need to spend the $3000-$4000 for the paramotor training course, either, because you don't really need a license to fly a paramotor. You can just order one, and try your luck, although that would be a really bad idea.
posted by subdee at 1:42 PM on January 22, 2022
posted by subdee at 1:42 PM on January 22, 2022
Or order two, leave out the parachute entirely and try your luck that way.
posted by flabdablet at 2:42 PM on January 22, 2022
posted by flabdablet at 2:42 PM on January 22, 2022
Autopiloted human-sized quadcopters? Get back to me about a decade after car autopilots don't make stupid mistakes.
As it turns out, making an auto-piloted air vehicle is actually orders of magnitude easier than an auto-piloted car.
The uncomfortable thing that we are just on the verge of realizing, though, is that anyone who can make an auto-piloted aircraft can also make what is effectively a cruise missile. So that's kinda awkward.
posted by Kadin2048 at 2:55 PM on January 22, 2022 [6 favorites]
As it turns out, making an auto-piloted air vehicle is actually orders of magnitude easier than an auto-piloted car.
The uncomfortable thing that we are just on the verge of realizing, though, is that anyone who can make an auto-piloted aircraft can also make what is effectively a cruise missile. So that's kinda awkward.
posted by Kadin2048 at 2:55 PM on January 22, 2022 [6 favorites]
"THEY sent A SLAMHOUND on Turner's trail in New Delhi, slotted it to his pheromones and the color of his hair. It caught up with him on a street called Chandni Chauk and came scrambling for his rented BMW through a forest of bare brown legs and pedicab tires. Its core was a kilogram of recrystallized hexogene and flaked TNT.
He didn't see it coming. The last he saw of India was the pink stucco facade of a place called the Khush-Oil Hotel."
posted by Windopaene at 3:31 PM on January 22, 2022 [4 favorites]
He didn't see it coming. The last he saw of India was the pink stucco facade of a place called the Khush-Oil Hotel."
posted by Windopaene at 3:31 PM on January 22, 2022 [4 favorites]
Cruise missiles are actually easier to implement an autopilot for because the typical landing sequence is so much more robust.
posted by flabdablet at 3:31 PM on January 22, 2022 [4 favorites]
posted by flabdablet at 3:31 PM on January 22, 2022 [4 favorites]
Maybe I'm just in my own bubble, but who would be all the people with time and space and excess funds to get into flying? Seems like the complaints about hobby aviation slowing down has more behind it than perhaps just "people aren't as interested in flying."
This kind of thing is certainly the province of people with more money than sense, but as far as that is from being the average American experience, it’s also something we have more of in absolute numbers than ever.
posted by atoxyl at 4:02 PM on January 22, 2022
This kind of thing is certainly the province of people with more money than sense, but as far as that is from being the average American experience, it’s also something we have more of in absolute numbers than ever.
posted by atoxyl at 4:02 PM on January 22, 2022
Ooh - it was the Beechcraft Bonanza that was initially earned the nickname "doctor killer" when it debuted. It was a total revolution in aircraft design and construction and remains the most popular general aviation plane ever. It's main competitor from Cessna was a pre-war design that was still used a radial engine and had the wing up on top. The Bonanza was modern from design to construction using technology developed during the Second World War. It's piston engine was faster and more powerful, featured tech like retractable landing gear and a relatively unique V tail design.
Their performance is no joke - one named Waikiki Beech was famously used to set a nonstop record of a 36 hour continuous flight from Hawaii to New Jersey. Just look at the wing pods! So Modern! Later the this plane was borrowed out of it's retirement at the National Air and Space Museum, renamed Friendship Flame and flown around the world.
Many people have crashed them - that whole "Day the Music Died", well that was a Bonanza. Or when Randy Rhoads was showing off and clipped his tour bus? Another Bonanza. Part of this is because it is a popular plane. And a few are the result of various imperfections in the design - the v tail turned out to be weak and would fail catastrophically during flight. Pilots often landed it gear up, and even would pull the gear up on the ground. But most accidents were attributed to pilot error and as training improved the plane's accident rate dropped. But the reputation persists so jr pilots can get their hands on them relatively cheap. Which likely increases the number that crash.
So guess what happened when Cessna introduced the twin engine 310 that was a step up from from the Bonanza? Initially a significant increase in accidents. And when Cirrus SR22 came out it even got an updated nickname - The Geek Killer. The SR22 is considered to be the most sophisticated plane available to the public. It does include a big whole plane parachute, but they have also put out a trainer plane with a simpler control system, and fixed gear to try and get folks up to speed with the airframe.
posted by zenon at 4:51 PM on January 22, 2022 [1 favorite]
Their performance is no joke - one named Waikiki Beech was famously used to set a nonstop record of a 36 hour continuous flight from Hawaii to New Jersey. Just look at the wing pods! So Modern! Later the this plane was borrowed out of it's retirement at the National Air and Space Museum, renamed Friendship Flame and flown around the world.
Many people have crashed them - that whole "Day the Music Died", well that was a Bonanza. Or when Randy Rhoads was showing off and clipped his tour bus? Another Bonanza. Part of this is because it is a popular plane. And a few are the result of various imperfections in the design - the v tail turned out to be weak and would fail catastrophically during flight. Pilots often landed it gear up, and even would pull the gear up on the ground. But most accidents were attributed to pilot error and as training improved the plane's accident rate dropped. But the reputation persists so jr pilots can get their hands on them relatively cheap. Which likely increases the number that crash.
So guess what happened when Cessna introduced the twin engine 310 that was a step up from from the Bonanza? Initially a significant increase in accidents. And when Cirrus SR22 came out it even got an updated nickname - The Geek Killer. The SR22 is considered to be the most sophisticated plane available to the public. It does include a big whole plane parachute, but they have also put out a trainer plane with a simpler control system, and fixed gear to try and get folks up to speed with the airframe.
posted by zenon at 4:51 PM on January 22, 2022 [1 favorite]
Yeah the auto-pilot is a pipe dream, just look around, birds crashing into each other and falling from the sky all the damn time.
posted by zengargoyle at 5:24 PM on January 22, 2022 [1 favorite]
posted by zengargoyle at 5:24 PM on January 22, 2022 [1 favorite]
I think that a coming pilot shortage is an interesting problem, but not one related to the lack of desire for a consumer jet pack. I am a bit surprised that no billionaire wants to throw R&D money at them on a whim - it seems like there’s a story hidden in their failed pitch deck.
posted by Going To Maine at 7:16 PM on January 22, 2022
posted by Going To Maine at 7:16 PM on January 22, 2022
I think a big part of why no one is all that interested in the jetpack this guy has is the somewhat less than 8 minute flight time.
I mean, sure, it's kinda cool, and crazy dangerous because one engine hiccup and you're falling and dead, but eight minutes isn't enough time to get much of anywhere even leaving aside the safety issues.
So in general yeah, it's kinda cool if you're a rich guy who wants to spend some time doing something kinda cool. But I think the breathless "gee why isn't everyone wanting in on this" reporting is really missing the obvious answers to why everyone isn't wanting in on that.
I also think it's a generational thing. I'm 47 and I think I'm just barely at the younger edge of people who grew up thinking flying cars might be fun or some indicator of the idea that we're succeeding in "the future". It's people who grew up with the Jetsons and Heinlein suchlike who are into flying car and/or jetpack idea. Sure, there's younger people who are into it, but or most younger people the bit about flying cars a punchline, not an aspiration.
posted by sotonohito at 7:17 PM on January 22, 2022 [2 favorites]
I mean, sure, it's kinda cool, and crazy dangerous because one engine hiccup and you're falling and dead, but eight minutes isn't enough time to get much of anywhere even leaving aside the safety issues.
So in general yeah, it's kinda cool if you're a rich guy who wants to spend some time doing something kinda cool. But I think the breathless "gee why isn't everyone wanting in on this" reporting is really missing the obvious answers to why everyone isn't wanting in on that.
I also think it's a generational thing. I'm 47 and I think I'm just barely at the younger edge of people who grew up thinking flying cars might be fun or some indicator of the idea that we're succeeding in "the future". It's people who grew up with the Jetsons and Heinlein suchlike who are into flying car and/or jetpack idea. Sure, there's younger people who are into it, but or most younger people the bit about flying cars a punchline, not an aspiration.
posted by sotonohito at 7:17 PM on January 22, 2022 [2 favorites]
> somewhat less than 8 minute flight time.
And everyone says nuclear power is a dead end technology...
posted by memetoclast at 7:32 PM on January 22, 2022 [1 favorite]
And everyone says nuclear power is a dead end technology...
posted by memetoclast at 7:32 PM on January 22, 2022 [1 favorite]
After he ducks out of the jetpack, Wesson collapses on the plastic chair next to Yancey, his face bright pink and limbs limp. He’s flown just about every kind of airplane and helicopter, but “that”, he says, “is the hardest thing I’ve ever done”.
I just flew 8 minutes and boy are my arms tired!
It doesn't sound like people will be doing 30 minute flights, even if they had the fuel.
posted by ryanrs at 8:33 PM on January 22, 2022 [1 favorite]
I just flew 8 minutes and boy are my arms tired!
It doesn't sound like people will be doing 30 minute flights, even if they had the fuel.
posted by ryanrs at 8:33 PM on January 22, 2022 [1 favorite]
I've never flown a real jetpack but I've done a couple of different types of water jetpacks (groupons FTW!) and those are super fun, but if you mess up and dive directly into the water head first it hurts.. They aren't even that expensive compared to a boat or jetski.
posted by The_Vegetables at 7:37 AM on January 24, 2022
posted by The_Vegetables at 7:37 AM on January 24, 2022
Washington Post: The futuristic jetpack never quite took off — but one man did, over and over
posted by jenfullmoon at 9:42 AM on January 24, 2022
posted by jenfullmoon at 9:42 AM on January 24, 2022
« Older Behold the Weird Old Book Finder | He Didn't Give Up Skateboarding Because He Got Old Newer »
This thread has been archived and is closed to new comments
I dunno, I just don't dream about an improved fantasy commute these days.
posted by Imperfect at 9:02 AM on January 22, 2022 [34 favorites]