Nineteen and Pregnant in 1969

November 1, 2022 6:08 AM

This is the most beautiful and memorable pieces of writing I've come across in a long time. Excerpt from Making the Rounds: Defying Norms in Love and Medicine by Patricia Grayhall
posted by night_train (5 comments total)

Even though my life would seem to be nothing like hers, it's completely relatable because she's so human.
posted by gestalt saloon at 6:29 AM on November 1, 2022 [1 favorite]

Thanks for posting this. I really wanted to know more (though not enough to read the book). What happened with her and Amal? It was unclear, was Amal also gay and in love with her? When she offered to co-parent, I thought so, but then she thinks she's the only lesbian in Arizona, so I guess not?

Also I'm deeply uncomfortable with the sexual encounter where she got pregnant. She doesn't seem to think it's problematic and I don't want to impose my view on her, since she was actually there..but..she was drunk, he seems to have been older (he had money, he's called a "philanderer" which would be an unusual way to describe a 19 year old, and he has the networks and wherewithal to get a doctor to lie to cover his ass). The power balance seems problematic in general, but also on this particular evening when she was drunk (possibly by his plan, since he arranged for her to have access to plentiful wine she said she was not used to drinking). Yeah, I don't want to impose my view over hers, but this sure feels icky.
posted by If only I had a penguin... at 7:15 AM on November 1, 2022 [1 favorite]

Also I'm deeply uncomfortable with the sexual encounter where she got pregnant. She doesn't seem to think it's problematic

Discussions about consent, intoxication and the ability to consent as it relates to sex, boundaries, and body autonomy have come a distance since 1969 and that's a good thing. But anecdotally I feel like there is drastically more education/awareness/discussion of those topics in the last 5-10 years than the 40 years before that. Credit to #metoo etc.
posted by gestalt saloon at 1:58 PM on November 1, 2022 [1 favorite]

Im trying to think what the shortest, most vivid story that explains post-chaperonage pre-feminism sexual behavior is and I’m coming up blank. Sylvia Plath? The Southern lesbian Marine antifeminist whose name I’m blanking on? Stepping from the Shadows, sadly out of print?

I don’t think Grayhall doesn’t think it’s problematic. She thought it was normal. So did her mother.
posted by clew at 6:35 PM on November 1, 2022

Unlucky as she was, she was lucky. Getting un-raped is impossible, getting un-pregnant is costly and hurtful, but not lonely, at least this one time.
posted by Oyéah at 4:42 PM on November 2, 2022