14% FALL TO DEATH

March 21, 2023 4:59 AM

Elden Ring Stats Reveal What Bosses Killed Players The Most [Bandai Namco] “Over 20 million people played Elden Ring. Now, a year after FromSoftware’s open-world Soulsborne released, we finally know which part of the game destroyed players the most. It was Malenia of course. Players attempted to fight her 329 million times, [...] Publisher Bandai Namco released that stat along with a bunch of other new ones to highlight the 2022 GOTY’s first anniversary. While the infographics don’t say exactly how many times Malenia killed players, it’s a safe bet that her being the most-attempted boss means she was also responsible for the most failed attempts. [...] The number one cause of death, meanwhile, was enemies and NPCs. That’s how 69 percent of players bit the dust (nice). Player-vs-player kills were only a measly 2 percent. Most summons were for co-op as well.” [via: Kotaku]
posted by Fizz (27 comments total)

considering how hard it is to even get to Malenia, those attempt numbers are all the more impressive in terms of her ability to repeatedly ruin your shit

a smart thing elden ring does comparative to most other fromsoft games is have save points directly in front of boss fights, which makes the hardest ones less frustrating and more an exercise in repeatedly muttering to yourself "ok I got you this time motherfucker"

(I beat malenia on my first go, but I'm not even all that proud because I knew at least some of her secrets beforehand and by that point had really loaded for bear with a cheap blasphemous blade build)
posted by Kybard at 5:44 AM on March 21, 2023 [7 favorites]

Limgrave Tree Sentinel really punching above it’s weight here.
posted by rodlymight at 5:45 AM on March 21, 2023 [2 favorites]

Limgrave Tree Sentinel really punching above it’s weight here.

I ran right past that gimmick boss b/c I was like, NOPE. A few hours later I wrecked his shit but they are tricky.
posted by Fizz at 5:47 AM on March 21, 2023 [1 favorite]

I hate that rolypoly priest. That fucker has the worst gimmick in the game. Almost as bad as that utter bullshit fire bear spawning lava under your feet in Forbidden West
posted by seanmpuckett at 6:06 AM on March 21, 2023

Yeah, getting to Malenia is is an absolute hell-march, and then you have to fight Malenia. I lost count, but she took me about 50 attempts I think?

Felt amazing when I finally beat her.
posted by Doleful Creature at 6:10 AM on March 21, 2023

Limgrave Tree Sentinel really punching above it’s weight here.

It was the first enemy I saw after the tutorial section and I knew for sure it would absolutely wreck my shit. But I just had to know how badly.

He's relatively easy to avoid, but sometimes you just have to kick the beehive, you know? Anyway, he hit me so hard my character never spoke for the entire game. :(
posted by Kutsuwamushi at 6:13 AM on March 21, 2023 [10 favorites]

It's hilarious, though, I'm most way through my second playthrough in the game and I still have no idea where Malenia is. There's entire vast regions of the game I haven't even seen. From are real assholes [complimentary] that way. If you don't have item X and don't do Y while at place Z having followed an obscure branching NPC quest to a non-obvious conclusion, you may miss several square kliometres of the land mass of the game. Times four or five, Jesus.
posted by seanmpuckett at 6:14 AM on March 21, 2023 [3 favorites]

Limgrave Tree Sentinel

I mean, he's like eight feet from the tutorial cave exit and very easy to accidentally aggro before you even have your magic horse buddy or the ability to summon a distraction. He's basically the game's way of signalling to players that discretion is the better part of valor.
posted by pullayup at 7:17 AM on March 21, 2023 [10 favorites]

I still have no idea where Malenia is.

A quick explanation with (hopefully) minimal spoilers:

The items you need

Haligtree Secret Medallion. There are two halves -- one is given to you by the last remaining sane Albinauric in the village underneath Moonlight Altar (look carefully, he's camouflaged), the other is guarded by the boss of Castle Sol in Mountaintops. While you're at it, you should also follow Gideon's advice and find the Albinauric woman.

Where to use 'em

Grand Lift of Rold is the place. Instead of raising the normal medallion, press Left or Right on the d-pad to change your action to "raise secret medallion". This will take you to the Consecrated Snowfields.

So where's Malenia?

Joke's on you, she's not here either. You have to go alllllll the way north to Ordina and use the waygate to the Haligtree, then fight your way through the whole Haligtree.

posted by neckro23 at 7:29 AM on March 21, 2023 [7 favorites]

I mean, he's like eight feet from the tutorial cave exit and very easy to accidentally aggro before you even have your magic horse buddy or the ability to summon a distraction. He's basically the game's way of signalling to players that discretion is the better part of valor.

And if you don't learn from him, Margit will be more than happy to make sure you get the memo.


I hate that rolypoly priest. That fucker has the worst gimmick in the game.

If you mean the Godskin Noble, as long as you're medium rolling you can generally dodge through him if you aim your roll at his head- you'll still make model to model contact, but dodging through his head will generally keep that short enough for your iframes to protect you.*

*I find this about 75% reliable but I now a lot of people don't so YMMV based on timing and positions etc
posted by Pope Guilty at 7:34 AM on March 21, 2023

Are people still naming kids stuff like "Aydun" and "Braiden" and "Elden"? Is that still A Thing?
posted by rum-soaked space hobo at 8:23 AM on March 21, 2023

TRY JUMPING
posted by dismas at 9:11 AM on March 21, 2023 [6 favorites]

I think my savegame, untouched for months, is probably sitting at the Malenia savepoint. Could not get past her. I've pretty much given up on the game.
posted by egypturnash at 9:17 AM on March 21, 2023 [1 favorite]

About having these hidden areas and bosses. You don't have to beat them to finish the main story; there's just 13 bosses required to get to the credit sequence, and Malenia is not on the list. They're there for a voluntary challenge, not as a gate. I mean if you want to get a certain ending, you may have to do something else, but that's a choice you make. In a sense, like 80% of the game is voluntary, as there are dozens and dozens of named bosses you can challenge if you want to, but otherwise you can just skip those areas/fights.
posted by seanmpuckett at 9:36 AM on March 21, 2023 [2 favorites]

The Haligtree is my favorite video game level in years. In classic FROM style, to find the one way into the level within the vast world of Elden ring, it requires a doing a one of a kind slightly frustrating stealth quest within a hidden area, and then you teleport in to the very top of this enormously messed up tree that echoes in an unsettling way the giant magical tree you've been seeing the whole game. There's no reason for the level to be there. It's a huge area. It could be a DLC. You start in the rotten upper branches, work your way through different parts of the city built into this huge tree, and you're told a whole story by the time you get to Malenia. Once you're there, you're hooked. Plenty of players are getting help and using guides, and it's a fun fight to throw yourself again and again, even though we can all agree that one move is sorta BS. Not surprised she's on here, as hidden as she is.
posted by Rinku at 9:53 AM on March 21, 2023 [2 favorites]

I am impressed that From sticks to their guns, but I would gladly pay them $10 to unlock easy mode with the agreement that I cannot say I beat the game. I loved Elden but only made it halfway through. I am too old and my time is worth more than the time spent on the muscle memory grind. Seriously, charge me for easier mode. I would pay it. Shit, I would probably pay for easier mode for each boss after I am on the verge of throwing the controller through the window. Reset to hard mode after I beat a boss and take my money after 43 tries.
posted by jasondigitized at 10:27 AM on March 21, 2023 [4 favorites]

I noped out at the Fire Giant. With the other bosses up until then, I felt like the game was (mostly) at least trying to play fair with me...and then it springs that on me.
posted by Mr. Bad Example at 10:47 AM on March 21, 2023

If you're stuck on a boss, I cannot recommend highly enough summoning other people for multiplayer. Elden Ring makes it easier than ever to find people to team up with and Jolly Cooperation^TM is one of the best parts of From games. For Malenia in particular, there's usually at least 5-10 people hanging out with their summoning signs specifically in front of her door looking to help you kill her, and there's usually at least one or two who want to replicate the Let Me Solo Her gimmick.

That and spirit ashes, the Omenkiller, Mimic Tear, Greatshield Soldiers, and Black Knfe Tiche ashes in particular. Interestingly, if you summon somebody for a boss and they get killed, once they're out of your game you're able to use the Furlcalling Finger Remedy again to cancel participation in online play, so if you're on a boss that gives you some windows where standing still that long is possible, it's entirely possible to summon somebody, have them get killed, use the Remedy again, and then summon an ash to help finish the fight.
posted by Pope Guilty at 11:07 AM on March 21, 2023 [2 favorites]

I would gladly pay them $10 to unlock easy mode with the agreement that I cannot say I beat the game.

Easy mode is already in the game, it's called summoning other players or using your Mimic Tear.

There are also many items in the game (Mimic Tear, Rivers of Blood, Blasphemous Blade, Moonveil katana, Comet Azur, Rotten Breath, formerly Flames of the Redmane before they recently nerfed it into oblivion) that trivialize many/most encounters.
posted by neckro23 at 11:20 AM on March 21, 2023 [1 favorite]

Agreed, neckro23. Summoning other players to help with bosses is trivially easy. You do need to be connected online of course. I never had a problem or had to wait more than a couple minutes to summon help. Getting help doesn't mean instant win, but most of the people up for helping have killed the boss they are waiting by 100 times, so they know what they are doing.

There's a learning curve to these games. Even with summoning help, they are tough. But they are very, very fun, detailed and interesting. And lovely-gruesome.

The Subreddit for this game is tremendously nice and helpful. Souls games have a reputation of having asshole fans. I'm sure they are out there, but check out the Subreddit some time. People are really helpful and generally nice. They want to spread the love. There's even a another Subreddit where you can ask for help with specific bosses and areas. People will see the sign you put down and enter your code (it's a fairly easy to learn process, not going to spell it out here but it's simple to figure out) and they will show up in your game. All you need is a laptop near your console.

I played this on PS5, and while it's not graphically amazing, the art direction is stellar. Load times are fast. And there's a fast travel system.

You die a lot, but dying is part of the game. Everyone dies a lot. There's an in-game explanation as to why you resurrect.
posted by SoberHighland at 11:55 AM on March 21, 2023 [1 favorite]

I have tried to beat Malenia like 50 times and I still can't. I have leveled up summons and everything and mimic tear and I still can't. However because I was traumatized by bad WoW experiences long ago, I am TERRIFIED to do group co-op stuff. It makes my blood pressure go thru the roof to even think about.

I don't totally suck at the game, I got THIS far, but I just can't beat her! But since I want to ACTUALLY beat the game, maybe i'll try summoning a person. GAAAAAH SO SCARY THOUGH. maybe i'll check the subreddit. jfc i'm getting anxious even thinking about it right now!
posted by capnsue at 2:06 PM on March 21, 2023 [3 favorites]

A thing about coop in Elden ring, and all the Souls games, is that they can’t even talk to you. For boss fights, It’s just a gesture or two for courtesy and then into the fog and the fight. The cooperator returns to their world when the boss dies (or when they die, or you die). It’s very low commitment and transitory, which I love about it.

Summoning people out in the world is a little different, that’s more where you party up with your pals (who still get kicked out every time you defeat a boss because the system wasn’t really designed for coop in the way that other games are).
posted by rodlymight at 2:25 PM on March 21, 2023 [5 favorites]

14% FALL TO DEATH

The Architects are always the most deadly boss in a Bungie game.

(Any death to the physics engine + level geometry is attributed to 'The Architects' on the respawn screen.)

Making Elden Ring easy largely involves deferring progressing the story to power up. Once you know where everything is.
posted by snuffleupagus at 3:27 PM on March 21, 2023 [1 favorite]

The boss guarding entry to the capital city is the first blocking encounter you can't really roll over this way (and there are ways to cheese that at range, if needed.) In retrospect, this is one of the bigger divergences from the Dark Souls titles (though you could grind for power in those too, just much more monotonously.)
posted by snuffleupagus at 3:34 PM on March 21, 2023

Agreed, I ***hate*** trying to play with other people because ... social anxiety garbage .... but Souls games the co-op people know they are there to kick ass and not fuck about. You may get a gesture or one of the canned greetings, but you can ignore all that. You don't even have to gesture. Just wait till people show up then do your buffs then get in the fog gate and try not to get killed. If you win just spin in place and jump a few times then lock the bonfire. It's all good.
posted by seanmpuckett at 4:35 PM on March 21, 2023 [3 favorites]

Praise the Fun.
posted by snuffleupagus at 6:12 PM on March 21, 2023 [1 favorite]

The boss guarding entry to the capital city is the first blocking encounter you can't really roll over this way (and there are ways to cheese that at range, if needed.)

I hate that fight so much that even on characters that could probably win without undue effort I still cheese it by sneaking around behind it with the Poison Mist spell (and a book to read while the poison does its work). Just an obnoxious fight.
posted by Pope Guilty at 9:00 AM on March 22, 2023 [1 favorite]