To edify and amuse the hive: The worst medical study I've seen in years
August 30, 2023 5:25 PM Subscribe
Courtesy of a British radiologist: Sword Swallowing And Its Side Effects
There was an absolutely AMAZING year-long blog thing by someone who had done one of those "sideshow freak boot camps" where you learn circus skills and then do a performance for your family and friends at the end of the class. The blog writer did sword-swallowing ended up perforating their esophagus during the end-of-class talent show and spent months in the hospital having to relearn how to swallow.
I wish I could find that blog again. It was horrifying and also fascinating.
posted by infinitywaltz at 6:00 PM on August 30, 2023 [7 favorites]
I wish I could find that blog again. It was horrifying and also fascinating.
posted by infinitywaltz at 6:00 PM on August 30, 2023 [7 favorites]
The sword swallowing paper previously on Metafilter:
A very BMJ Christmas
IgNobility 2009
living by the sword
You're not going to give me the umbrella, are you?
posted by zamboni at 6:01 PM on August 30, 2023 [3 favorites]
A very BMJ Christmas
IgNobility 2009
living by the sword
You're not going to give me the umbrella, are you?
posted by zamboni at 6:01 PM on August 30, 2023 [3 favorites]
My expression the entire time I read TFA.
We excluded cases in which injury was related to swallowing items other than swords, such as glass, neon tubes, spear guns, or jack hammers.
what
five had swallowed more than 10 at a time, and one had swallowed 16 swords together
WHAT
posted by Greg_Ace at 6:05 PM on August 30, 2023 [8 favorites]
We excluded cases in which injury was related to swallowing items other than swords, such as glass, neon tubes, spear guns, or jack hammers.
what
five had swallowed more than 10 at a time, and one had swallowed 16 swords together
WHAT
posted by Greg_Ace at 6:05 PM on August 30, 2023 [8 favorites]
Wait we get a medical study by a radiologist and it's not full of x-rays of swords down people's throats?
posted by thecjm at 6:42 PM on August 30, 2023 [13 favorites]
posted by thecjm at 6:42 PM on August 30, 2023 [13 favorites]
@infinitywaltz that might have been my blog! At least, I hope I'm the only sideshow-school casualty out there. I spent a month or so in the hospital after my own act went horribly awry.
I made the acquaintance of the co-author of this study, Dan Meyer, after my very brief sword-swallowing career. He really saw other performers as being part of a grand tradition and was was very intent on connecting performers with each other. Meeting other members of Dan's Sword Swallowers Association International (SSAI) reaffirmed something I'd learned first-hand earlier - in sword-swallowing, everyone gets hurt eventually.
posted by Transmissions From Vrillon at 6:48 PM on August 30, 2023 [69 favorites]
I made the acquaintance of the co-author of this study, Dan Meyer, after my very brief sword-swallowing career. He really saw other performers as being part of a grand tradition and was was very intent on connecting performers with each other. Meeting other members of Dan's Sword Swallowers Association International (SSAI) reaffirmed something I'd learned first-hand earlier - in sword-swallowing, everyone gets hurt eventually.
posted by Transmissions From Vrillon at 6:48 PM on August 30, 2023 [69 favorites]
@infinitywaltz that might have been my blog! At least, I hope I'm the only sideshow-school casualty out there. I spent a month or so in the hospital after my own act went horribly awry.
HOLY CRAP! It WAS your blog! Small world (and I'm so glad I found this blog again)!
posted by infinitywaltz at 6:50 PM on August 30, 2023 [15 favorites]
Wow, that is beautiful synchronicity.
posted by Dip Flash at 7:25 PM on August 30, 2023 [3 favorites]
posted by Dip Flash at 7:25 PM on August 30, 2023 [3 favorites]
No one underwent thoracotomy, although one had a breadknife removed transabdominally.
A Pubmed "similar" article, 2010's Management of sword-swallower injuries
& this "cited by," 2014's The Ethics of Ironic Science in Its Search for Spoof
posted by Iris Gambol at 7:26 PM on August 30, 2023 [2 favorites]
A Pubmed "similar" article, 2010's Management of sword-swallower injuries
& this "cited by," 2014's The Ethics of Ironic Science in Its Search for Spoof
posted by Iris Gambol at 7:26 PM on August 30, 2023 [2 favorites]
Metafilter: Oh you mean my 2009 blog about a truncated career as a sideshow performer?
posted by thisiscolossal at 6:55 AM on August 31, 2023 [17 favorites]
posted by thisiscolossal at 6:55 AM on August 31, 2023 [17 favorites]
VFP/(D)ROU Breadknife Removed Transabdominally
posted by rhamphorhynchus at 7:10 AM on August 31, 2023
posted by rhamphorhynchus at 7:10 AM on August 31, 2023
The article mentions: The first endoscopy by Adolph Kussmaul in 1868 used mirrors and a gasoline lamp in a sword swallower, but rigid instruments, with their high rate of perforation, have largely been replaced.
In the unlikely event that anyone's even remotely interested, the stage name of the sword swallower who assisted in those early endoscopy demos was "Iron Henry".
(I'm editing a book that includes the history of endoscopy tubes.)
posted by Jody Tresidder at 7:23 AM on August 31, 2023 [10 favorites]
In the unlikely event that anyone's even remotely interested, the stage name of the sword swallower who assisted in those early endoscopy demos was "Iron Henry".
(I'm editing a book that includes the history of endoscopy tubes.)
posted by Jody Tresidder at 7:23 AM on August 31, 2023 [10 favorites]
A Seaman Ingested 35 Knives. This is What Transpired in His Colon. Dr. Rohin Francis of MedLife Crisis spoofs Chubby Emu in this "Old English Journal of Medicine" account of a sailor who swallowed thirty-five knives before finally seeking medical attention. Excruciatingly funny and tragic at the same time. Eight minutes.
If you find this clip interesting, try "Injecting Cocaine into the Spine for Science".
posted by effluvia at 7:49 AM on August 31, 2023 [1 favorite]
If you find this clip interesting, try "Injecting Cocaine into the Spine for Science".
posted by effluvia at 7:49 AM on August 31, 2023 [1 favorite]
I've averted my eyes from Dan Meyer's performances many times at the annual Ig Nobel awards ceremony.
I think there was one year when they set a world record for most Nobel Laureates drawing a sword from a sword swallower, but I can't confirm anything because I obviously didn't watch it.
posted by RonButNotStupid at 7:51 AM on August 31, 2023 [1 favorite]
I think there was one year when they set a world record for most Nobel Laureates drawing a sword from a sword swallower, but I can't confirm anything because I obviously didn't watch it.
posted by RonButNotStupid at 7:51 AM on August 31, 2023 [1 favorite]
I remember Jim Rose (of JR Circus Sideshow fame) finished up in hospital once because he'd chewed up and swallowed too many lightbulbs that day.
posted by Paul Slade at 8:13 AM on August 31, 2023 [1 favorite]
posted by Paul Slade at 8:13 AM on August 31, 2023 [1 favorite]
They rarely sought medical advice.
"Hello, as a medical professional, I'm trained to respond to all patients in a completely non-judgmental way. How can I help you today?" Thirty seconds later: "You are a complete and utter idiot! What the hell were you thinking?"
posted by Mr.Know-it-some at 8:22 AM on August 31, 2023 [5 favorites]
"Hello, as a medical professional, I'm trained to respond to all patients in a completely non-judgmental way. How can I help you today?" Thirty seconds later: "You are a complete and utter idiot! What the hell were you thinking?"
posted by Mr.Know-it-some at 8:22 AM on August 31, 2023 [5 favorites]
sword swallowing
jack hammer
rigid instruments
seaman
I'll just be over here, awaiting reports on some careless web searching.
posted by Halloween Jack at 8:34 AM on August 31, 2023 [2 favorites]
jack hammer
rigid instruments
seaman
I'll just be over here, awaiting reports on some careless web searching.
posted by Halloween Jack at 8:34 AM on August 31, 2023 [2 favorites]
Never mind--I've gotten to the end of the article, and there are a couple of paragraphs (from the following article) regarding an extremely improbable alleged medical procedure called the "umbrella test." Can't top that! (sad the actress to the bishop)
posted by Halloween Jack at 8:38 AM on August 31, 2023
posted by Halloween Jack at 8:38 AM on August 31, 2023
Huh. All my life I thought it was a trick and they were using some kind of collapsible sword. You mean people are actually sticking a sword down their throat? That’s nuts!
posted by TWinbrook8 at 9:12 AM on August 31, 2023 [3 favorites]
posted by TWinbrook8 at 9:12 AM on August 31, 2023 [3 favorites]
in sword-swallowing, everyone gets hurt, eventually
How do they not get hurt immediately, considering they (as it turns out) actually swallow a sword?
How does this thing gets out of the swallower's system- do they poop it out?!
Because if they do - it might be it's own sideshow, overshadowing the initial one. Or a sequel, with twice as bigger audience (and money)
posted by Green-eyed grenade at 11:02 AM on August 31, 2023
How do they not get hurt immediately, considering they (as it turns out) actually swallow a sword?
How does this thing gets out of the swallower's system- do they poop it out?!
Because if they do - it might be it's own sideshow, overshadowing the initial one. Or a sequel, with twice as bigger audience (and money)
posted by Green-eyed grenade at 11:02 AM on August 31, 2023
> How do they not get hurt immediately, considering they (as it turns out) actually swallow a sword?
The article actually has a very informative description of how training is accomplished, with a very specific identification of precisely which muscles they need to learn to relax. This section of the paper also distinguishes the gag reflex from the retching reflex, which I guess makes sense, but... jesus.
Apparently they are actually getting the end of the sword all the way down into their stomachs? I guess I too assumed there was some fakery going on.
posted by vibratory manner of working at 11:54 AM on August 31, 2023
The article actually has a very informative description of how training is accomplished, with a very specific identification of precisely which muscles they need to learn to relax. This section of the paper also distinguishes the gag reflex from the retching reflex, which I guess makes sense, but... jesus.
Apparently they are actually getting the end of the sword all the way down into their stomachs? I guess I too assumed there was some fakery going on.
posted by vibratory manner of working at 11:54 AM on August 31, 2023
How does this thing gets out of the swallower's system- do they poop it out?!
Apologies if I’m missing the joke here but they retrieve the sword in short order the same way it went in. It doesn’t go all the way in.
posted by atoxyl at 12:19 PM on August 31, 2023
Apologies if I’m missing the joke here but they retrieve the sword in short order the same way it went in. It doesn’t go all the way in.
posted by atoxyl at 12:19 PM on August 31, 2023
The sword swallower injury studies bring up some related case studies you also might not want to know about (yes, it’s a sex injury).
posted by atoxyl at 12:25 PM on August 31, 2023 [1 favorite]
posted by atoxyl at 12:25 PM on August 31, 2023 [1 favorite]
yes, it’s a sex injury
Jesus - what is that guy's dick made of?
posted by Paul Slade at 12:43 AM on September 2, 2023
Jesus - what is that guy's dick made of?
posted by Paul Slade at 12:43 AM on September 2, 2023
Mod note: [btw, Transmissions From Vrillon's comment and this post have been added to the sidebar]
posted by taz (staff) at 3:23 AM on September 2, 2023 [2 favorites]
posted by taz (staff) at 3:23 AM on September 2, 2023 [2 favorites]
@vibratory manner of working - Your assumption is correct. At my best, I was able to swallow two 24" blades, and I could feel their points touch the bottom of my stomach. Very odd sensation.
If anyone has questions about sword-swallowing, I'm happy to try to answer them here or in a MeFi mail.
posted by Transmissions From Vrillon at 9:12 AM on September 3, 2023 [2 favorites]
If anyone has questions about sword-swallowing, I'm happy to try to answer them here or in a MeFi mail.
posted by Transmissions From Vrillon at 9:12 AM on September 3, 2023 [2 favorites]
« Older This is a solar-powered website, which means it... | Finally a killer AI Newer »
This thread has been archived and is closed to new comments
And the BMJ’s Christmas Issue. posted by zamboni at 5:50 PM on August 30, 2023