Icahn seen clearly now the gains have gone

December 21, 2023 12:18 PM

Also: Consultants Consult, 'Sad' Goat, God-given Middle Finger, Orca Moms & more in The 2023 Headline of the Year Nominees [X, nitter]
posted by chavenet (20 comments total)

"British Museum asks public and experts to help recover stolen artifacts" is just too depressingly on-the-nose, but the Icahn headline is pure gold and I doff my punner's cap to whomever wrote it.
posted by smirkette at 12:33 PM on December 21, 2023 [2 favorites]

Bowling pun is a STRIIIIIIKE!
posted by lalochezia at 12:37 PM on December 21, 2023 [1 favorite]

As someone who briefly wrote headlines for a living:
You admire the artistry of the editor whose breadth of knowledge and wordsmithing skills delivers the "Icahn see clearly..." but even more so the brilliance and guts of the editor who sees the facts -- often buried or watered down in overly cautious reporting -- and writes a deadpan sledgehammer like that Ottawa consultants headline. Bravo, my friend!
posted by martin q blank at 12:50 PM on December 21, 2023 [6 favorites]

Police rush to reports of ‘ritual mass murder,’ but it was just a yoga class
--CNN, 8 September 2023

Porque No los Dos?
posted by srboisvert at 1:37 PM on December 21, 2023 [9 favorites]

I am impressed at the number of Canadian headlines that have been nominated.
posted by jb at 1:41 PM on December 21, 2023 [1 favorite]

Police rush to reports of ‘ritual mass murder,’ but it was just a yoga class

Of course they did. It's a chance to play soldier tough guy without any actual danger--maybe get the grenade launchers out of the shed.

"Ritual mass murder"? C'mon. That only occurs at the highest levels of government, not that I'd be against forcibly taking down republican legislatures...
posted by maxwelton at 2:04 PM on December 21, 2023 [3 favorites]

I am impressed at the number of Canadian headlines that have been nominated.

You've come a long way...
posted by chavenet at 2:09 PM on December 21, 2023 [2 favorites]

I am impressed at the number of Canadian headlines that have been nominated.

Impressed by the number of Canadian headlines nominated by the guy who is Canadian? I know we love to think someone has noticed us, but this may not be an entirely unbiased selection.
posted by ssg at 2:48 PM on December 21, 2023 [1 favorite]

Also, it's fun to see how many of the sources you can identify from font and other design attributes alone. I get CBC, Guardian, Globe & Mail, New York, FT, NYT and Global.
posted by ssg at 2:54 PM on December 21, 2023 [3 favorites]

My top 3:
Spare Relationship Causes Awkward Split (runaway winner)
Icahn Seen Clearly Now
See Ya Later
posted by azpenguin at 2:55 PM on December 21, 2023 [2 favorites]

How does one read twitter threads these days? A few weeks ago these thread links just go to one tweet. I have never had a Twitter account and these shenanigans are not going to get me to sign up now
posted by keep_evolving at 4:39 PM on December 21, 2023 [1 favorite]

Use the nitter link.
posted by Mitheral at 5:13 PM on December 21, 2023 [3 favorites]

Here's a Mastodon link.
posted by ob1quixote at 5:47 PM on December 21, 2023 [1 favorite]

“Buffalo Bills head coach Sean McDermott apologises for using 9/11 hijackers as example of teamwork”

We’ve all made that mistake.
posted by teece303 at 11:22 PM on December 21, 2023 [2 favorites]

issuing correction on a previous post of mine, regarding the terror group ISIL. you do not, under any circumstances, "gotta hand it to them"

From dril (obviously).
posted by Literaryhero at 12:15 AM on December 22, 2023 [3 favorites]

We've all made that mistake.

'you do not, under any circumstances, "gotta hand it to them"'
posted by Hermione Dies at 12:15 AM on December 22, 2023 [3 favorites]

Jinx!
posted by Literaryhero at 2:40 AM on December 22, 2023 [3 favorites]

Jinx!

That dril tweet was also my immediate thought on reading the Bills Coach headline.
posted by Navelgazer at 7:20 AM on December 22, 2023 [1 favorite]

I know we love to think someone has noticed us, but this may not be an entirely unbiased selection.

I didn't realize that. I was hoping we had international attention for our silly headlines.
posted by jb at 2:52 PM on December 22, 2023

I’m glad that the author followed up with voting statistics. It makes me feel better about not understanding what was either funny or odd about the Orca Moms headline, seeing it at the bottom of the rankings.
posted by neuracnu at 1:23 AM on December 23, 2023