Re: Orange Peel Theory

January 28, 2024 9:33 AM

In Vox, Alex Abad-Santos explains what TikTok’s true love test is all about: Would you dump someone if they didn’t peel you an orange? So far, everything I've read about this is specious, because nobody's specifying what kind of orange.

A cook, Justin Shelton, favors the Navel in Which Oranges Are Easiest To Peel? but food writer Emily Wong gives the Valencia the edge in Best Orange for Peeling, where she says the worst are "conventional" oranges.

posted by Rash (105 comments total)

I'm becoming convinced that TikTok is a special kind of brain poison above and beyond other previous kinds of brain poison. More ridiculous "trends" emerge out of there, and some of them are just stupid but others are actively harmful.

Anyway, aren't tangelos the easiest ones to peel? I seem to remember that somehow.
posted by hippybear at 9:41 AM on January 28 [26 favorites]

Are they taking the pith?
posted by zamboni at 9:41 AM on January 28 [121 favorites]

This whole orange-peeling debate has become something of a distraction from the underlying question: Do you even need to peel the orange?
And the answer is: No, you do not. You cut into quarters and bite into each piece, pulling the meat away from the peel. (Optionally, you can do Vito Corleone orange fangs if you wish to amuse any children, partners or yourself.)
Thus, we finesse the so-called "love test" simply by handing your beloved an orange quarter and letting them have at it.
posted by the sobsister at 9:43 AM on January 28 [14 favorites]

You cut into quarters and bite into each piece, pulling the meat away from the peel.

With this beard and mustache, I can only do that if I'm planning on taking a shower immediately after eating.
posted by hippybear at 9:45 AM on January 28 [5 favorites]

Or just eat the fucking peel like a normal person.
posted by grog at 9:46 AM on January 28 [62 favorites]

What would you do if I peeled you an orange?
Would you stand up and walk out on me?
Far as I know nothing else rhymes with orange
So it's just Navel gazing you see
posted by credulous at 9:47 AM on January 28 [53 favorites]

Or just eat the fucking peel like a normal person.

Finally someone is brave enough to say it.
posted by The Manwich Horror at 9:47 AM on January 28 [9 favorites]

”It seems like these tests aren’t that different from what you’d see in magazines like Cosmo. Like those, “Is he the one?” type of quizzes from junior high and high school. Do you think these social media tests are just newer, digital iterations of stuff that’s been around forever?”
posted by Freelance Demiurge at 9:50 AM on January 28 [9 favorites]

How does this fit with the "young women are going left/ young men are going right" article a few posts down?
posted by Saxon Kane at 9:56 AM on January 28 [6 favorites]

With this beard and mustache, I can only do that if I'm planning on taking a shower immediately after eating.

The trick is to suck as you bite, which, even as I write it, sounds terribly lubricious for a Sunday morning, but there you have it. This avoids orange juice spillage during the meat-detachment phase. Which sounds no better.
posted by the sobsister at 9:58 AM on January 28 [23 favorites]

I find these kinds of articles infuriating. The way they posture themselves as above what they're looking at.

The "orange peel theory" has the word theory on the end of it because when it was first spawned, it was a parable, a simile story explaining a form relationships should take. In the story, a woman's husband peels oranges for her without being asked, despite her clear ability to do it for herself, as an indication of the small ways that care and love for your partner can manifest. It was very obviously not about peeling oranges. Of course, a lot of people will take it literally, and then "high brow" media gets to come along behind and point and laugh.

In my circles, the theory is feminist-leaning. It points at male partners who only really like their female partners for sex and for status, and asks the women to consider whether their partner fits that mold. Does he listen to things that you value, does he know them and remember them? Does he put those things into practice and actually demonstrate his care and love, even if in a small way?
posted by Axle at 9:58 AM on January 28 [34 favorites]

The correct answer (for those of us with champagne tastes) is not in peeling an orange, but...

Peel me a grape, crush me some ice
Skin me a peach, save the fuzz for my pillow
Talk to me nice, talk to me nice
You've got to wine me and dine me
Don't try to fool me, bejewel me
Either amuse me or lose me
I'm getting hungry, peel me a grape
posted by Capt. Renault at 10:00 AM on January 28 [18 favorites]

Or just eat the fucking peel like a normal person.

Sure, but then what do you do with the gross squishy middle part?
posted by aubilenon at 10:05 AM on January 28 [19 favorites]

So... am I crazy for thinking this is, um, not at all unreasonable?

Like, what kind of lame asshole partner won't even peel you a goddamn orange?
posted by kyrademon at 10:09 AM on January 28 [15 favorites]

> The trick is to suck as you bite

also de rigueur for gooey burritos and tacos you put too much sauce on, etc
posted by glonous keming at 10:12 AM on January 28

if you make your love jump through stupid hoops to prove their love, and they do it, then they pass the test, but YOU fail it.
posted by Clowder of bats at 10:16 AM on January 28 [39 favorites]

I am happily partnered and will not be performing this test, but I identify as the woman in the picture most of the way down the Vox article happily peeling her own orange, captioned: This woman peeled the oranges for herself. On TikTok she would be deemed a spinster.
posted by the primroses were over at 10:16 AM on January 28 [18 favorites]

I don't know why everyone gets so bent out of shape by these silly things.

If the orange peel test or bird spotting test ends your relationship, that's probably the best outcome.

No one is thriving in a relationship that's THAT tenuous and stupid, better to get it out of your system and move on. Let the kids speedrun their misery, it's fine.
posted by phunniemee at 10:28 AM on January 28 [11 favorites]

I'm with Axle, in that the way this manifested on my feed has been women talking about it as a theory, not a test. No one I saw talking about it was saying or even implying they need to be waited on hand and foot, just that how your partner would react to something as simple as "hey, can you peel me an orange?" can be illustrative. I don't ask my partner to peel oranges but I do ask him to, say, bring my laundry basket upstairs for me and he does it happily. That means something to me.

I did see one where a woman recorded herself asking her boyfriend to peel an orange for her and he devolved into ranting things like "you're not that special" within about 2 minutes so that's once instance where the test certainly revealed something. The video stays on the woman's face the whole time and you just hear the boyfriend in the background, and the way her face fell was heartbreaking.
posted by misskaz at 10:29 AM on January 28 [21 favorites]

Far as I know nothing else rhymes with orange

"Doorhinge", if you sort of drop the h (door'inge)
posted by Greg_Ace at 10:32 AM on January 28 [5 favorites]

(The "name a woman" trend mentioned in the article also showed up completely differently on my feed, in that answering with the name of their partner was NOT the point but in fact getting at "does this man ever think about women as people who aren't his immediate companion")
posted by misskaz at 10:35 AM on January 28 [1 favorite]

The 3 Oranges have a song full of rhymes for "oranges". [1m20s]
posted by hippybear at 10:36 AM on January 28

Plural makes it easy. Rhymes for oranges come out of people's pharynges all the time.
posted by aubilenon at 10:53 AM on January 28 [1 favorite]

I gotta say if my spouse asked me to peel an orange for him my reaction would be, sure, are you ok? Bc that’s a fucking bizarre thing to ask.
posted by bq at 10:55 AM on January 28 [12 favorites]

Use a knife to cut away the stem side of the peel so you can access the pith. Use the back of a soup spoon wedged into the pith to coax the peel away. You can run the spoon around the meat to pull it all off and if you’re practiced can get the peel off in one piece. This works for almost any orange except the most tenacious.
posted by seanmpuckett at 10:58 AM on January 28 [2 favorites]

Id say Tenacious Orange is my band name but it rinds me of a political figure. I typo'd 'rinds' there and I'm gonna leave it because I find it appealing
posted by The otter lady at 11:06 AM on January 28 [21 favorites]

Like, what kind of lame asshole partner won't even peel you a goddamn orange?

The ideal match for the kind of lame asshole partner who poses such idiotic acid tests?
posted by Thorzdad at 11:17 AM on January 28 [10 favorites]

This theory (or test, depending on personality and appetite for drama in one's personal life I suppose) seems totally at odds with the love languages theory. More than one way to peel the proverbial orange of love.

I guess if your partner habitually expresses love through acts of service, and they don't do the above-and-beyond service of peeling the orange, maybe there's something to it.

But like... wouldn't the people who know their partner's "love language" not even need the test/theory? Takes a certain amount of observing how your partner treats you & expresses their love to identify their love language, wouldn't it.

Orange test is the free demo version of love languages?

I don't even know if the love language theory is particularly legit, but at least it involves more nuance
posted by Baethan at 11:19 AM on January 28 [1 favorite]

I have no doubt that my husband would peel me an orange if I asked him to. If there was no obvious reason he'd probably ask why, mainly just because it would be an odd request from me and he's a curious soul. But he'd do it as long as it didn't turn out to be some kind of prank or assholery on my part. Filming it to put on the internet as some sort of a "love test" would probably fall under one of the two in his estimation.

To be fair, if he out of the blue asked me to peel him an orange I'd also ask why. Mainly because I came of age during an era when it was common for men to expect to be waited on - "babe, get me a beer" - with the man just sitting there waiting to be served. So I'm a little sensitive to shades of that. But I'd totally do it otherwise, with the same caveat regarding pranks and assholery.
posted by Serene Empress Dork at 11:24 AM on January 28 [6 favorites]

This test is silly. Everyone knows the TRUE test is "will you break down a POMEGRANATE for me?"
Why, yes I am half Armenian. And also kidding.
posted by Larry David Syndrome at 11:29 AM on January 28 [20 favorites]

I'm reminded of Martha Stewart's method of working with a pomegranate which I believe involves tearing the fruit in half and then hitting the outside of the rind with a wooden spoon to make the seeds fall out.
posted by hippybear at 11:36 AM on January 28 [3 favorites]

So if you are really interested in someone, then what you need to do is peel an orange for them, and then they will have no choice but to fall for you?
posted by TedW at 11:40 AM on January 28 [2 favorites]

I’ve become quite fond of sumo mandarins, which are both tasty and easy to peel, and available for a much longer season than satsuma/unshiu mandarins (which I also love).
posted by mbrubeck at 11:41 AM on January 28 [9 favorites]

Meanwhile, that food “blog” from the "which oranges are easiest to peel” link seems to be machine-generated SEO spam. They have an article called “How Old is Cod?” whose text is actually about the video game Call Of Duty.
posted by mbrubeck at 11:46 AM on January 28 [16 favorites]

My wife and I peel oranges for each other all the time. Being presented with fruit ready to eat is a nice little surprise. And if she doesn't want it, more for me!
posted by The Manwich Horror at 11:47 AM on January 28 [14 favorites]

If God had meant for us to peel oranges for each other, he wouldn't have given us kitchen staff.
posted by mittens at 11:58 AM on January 28 [12 favorites]

> "The ideal match for the kind of lame asshole partner who poses such idiotic acid tests?"

I mean, OK, I get that, testing your partner is manipulative and simplistic litmus tests are a bad idea. But it's also, like, an orange? It's maybe one step up from, "Hey, could you pass me that sock?"

I wouldn't use it as a litmus test myself for the reasons already mentioned, among many others, but I've got to admit that if I ever happened to ask this for whatever reason and my partner said no without a decent reason of their own, I'd be pretty weirded out.
posted by kyrademon at 12:11 PM on January 28 [1 favorite]

Oranges Are Not the Only Fruit and of course here's La Banana
posted by chavenet at 12:20 PM on January 28 [2 favorites]

Of course the definitive treatise on peeling oranges was published in 1996 by Suzy Eddie Izzard.

… It’s like a very cheap round, isn’t it? "Go on, Satsuma for everyone!"
So Satsumas are great, eating’s a piece of piss, but you can’t do it with an orange. You go, "You want a bit of orange? I’ve got- fucking 'ell! Can’t fucking hell..." Cause inside an orange it’s like the film Das Boot in there! With Jürgen Prochnov going, "Don’t let them get in to the orange!"

posted by What is E. T. short for? at 12:23 PM on January 28 [1 favorite]

This test is silly. Everyone knows the TRUE test is "will you break down a POMEGRANATE for me?"

There's something to this. Cracking open a pomegranate isn't hard, but it is stressful.

The last internet citrus thing I remember was Eating Oranges in the Shower. I never actually tried it, but it seems better than doing secret competence checks on a partner. (Everyone makes fun of the epic bacon years, but at least people were trying to have fun back then on the internet. Now we're just kind of driving everyone crazy??)
posted by grandiloquiet at 12:34 PM on January 28 [1 favorite]

I can’t remember the last time I tried to peel an orange but clementines, you bet. They even come in cute little crates that stack great for storage. Also clementine juice is food of the gods.
posted by TWinbrook8 at 12:36 PM on January 28 [2 favorites]

I'm pretty sure there are many jerky men out there who wouldn't peel their own oranges, much less anyone else's. So I get the point of this original idea.

That said, I will never have the option to have anyone peel one for me except me, so, sigh.
posted by jenfullmoon at 12:46 PM on January 28

Or just eat the fucking peel like a normal person.

My grade school bus driver ate oranges whole while driving down the road. We were in the country, so I would be on a bus for over an hour every morning and afternoon with a giant-haired madwoman munching down whole oranges and wearing crazy giant sunglasses while booting down country roads at high speed. If you sat in the back of the bus you would get pretty good air as she flew over bumps in the road.
posted by fimbulvetr at 12:48 PM on January 28 [12 favorites]

I don't know how relevant this is but cousin's husband says that he knew my cousin was the one for him very early on. He asked her if he could buy her a drink and she said "Hey, please pull up a chair, but I have my own fuckin' job and will be buying my own fuckin' drinks."

I guess what I'm saying is relationships are built on different foundations. Of course proactive support is important, but there's also a lot of value in having a partnership where you can trust the other person to peel their own fuckin' oranges and not worry too much about it, you know?
posted by Phobos the Space Potato at 1:00 PM on January 28 [13 favorites]

> Like, what kind of lame asshole partner won't even peel you a goddamn orange?

How they handle refusing to is what defines whether ‘asshole’ applies. If they viscerally shiver and flinch away from you and refuse and then start apologizing but still refuse, that’s fine. If they turn hostile and ‘I’m unable to cope with my shit’, as apparently some do (see story above about two minutes of ranting!), then that’s not fine. So I want to carefully separate the pith from the peel here: it isn’t inherently an asshole behavior to refuse, but how you refuse to peel can reveal if you’re rotten underneath.
posted by Callisto Prime at 1:13 PM on January 28 [1 favorite]

If they do the trick where they make little fire squirt out of the peel you should marry them.
posted by poe at 1:19 PM on January 28 [4 favorites]

Oh Beulah? Peel me a grape.
posted by DirtyOldTown at 1:37 PM on January 28

if you make your love jump through stupid hoops to prove their love, and they do it, then they pass the test, but YOU fail it.
Clowder of bats

Now I feel like an asshole for asking my partner to bring me a Silmaril from the Iron Crown of Morgoth.
posted by star gentle uterus at 1:38 PM on January 28 [38 favorites]

that's a terrible pharmacy - you should get your silmaril from rite-aid or walgreens
posted by pyramid termite at 1:49 PM on January 28 [23 favorites]

There's something to this. Cracking open a pomegranate isn't hard, but it is stressful.

The key to breaking down pomegranates is to submerge the fruit in a bowl of water while pulling it apart. Just let the seeds fall into the water as they don’t float. The white membrane between the seeds does. Skim that off the top. Pour the water into a strainer and have at the jewels. Winter would be a lot long if Persephone knew this trick.
posted by vorpal bunny at 2:38 PM on January 28 [12 favorites]

It should now be mentioned that a vorpal bunny is NOT what we witness in the Cave of Caerbannog. That is singular beast, entirely different from the one that made this above comment.
posted by hippybear at 2:42 PM on January 28 [3 favorites]

You don't actually have to ask, you can do this as a thought experiment since you probably already know the answer. Or if you don't that tells you something too.
posted by donio at 2:48 PM on January 28 [3 favorites]

If it was Cosmo, the test would be "Can your partner get you off using just an orange?"

I would peel Mrs C an orange if asked. I have absolutely no idea why I've had such a wonderful partner for 36 years, so I'm not taking any risks.
posted by Artful Codger at 2:51 PM on January 28 [12 favorites]

I wouldn't use it as a litmus test myself for the reasons already mentioned, among many others, but I've got to admit that if I ever happened to ask this for whatever reason and my partner said no without a decent reason of their own, I'd be pretty weirded out.

The particular setting for it makes it so weird though. Just out of the blue apropos of nothing "Would you please go get me a peeled orange?"

Like... not sick, or buried under four dogs, or otherwise indisposed? I'm just sitting somewhere else and not walking towards the kitchen? Why not just... get your own orange? What's wrong?
posted by GCU Sweet and Full of Grace at 2:52 PM on January 28 [8 favorites]

I'll peel you a tangerine any time...
posted by jim in austin at 2:53 PM on January 28

somehow I originally got the impression that you were supposed to conduct this experiment like a real shit test, ie you don't say you want the orange peeled

Explicitly asking for a peeled orange is more in the normal range of small impositions (assuming no extra burden, special circumstances, etc etc). Still kinda weird but less than what I thought
posted by Baethan at 3:06 PM on January 28

somehow I originally got the impression that you were supposed to conduct this experiment like a real shit test, ie you don't say you want the orange peeled

Just keep setting the orange in front of your partner with an incrementally increased amount of exasperation at your unvoiced desire not being met? Like maybe 10 attempts that begin with just a bit of side-eye when they fail and the final boss mode is you attempting to break their nose with the orange while screaming into their face about how they are an inattentive, imperfect mate doomed to incel status?

I don't know if there's a final move where you tear out their spine. I might have lost the plot.
posted by hippybear at 3:12 PM on January 28 [3 favorites]

You know, I was just thinking about the Roman Empire. They had bitter oranges and citrons, but not the nice sweet oranges that were introduced to Europe much later. Wait, what were you asking me?
posted by caviar2d2 at 3:18 PM on January 28 [23 favorites]

You know, I was just thinking about the Roman Empire.

Funny, someone reading this thread just lost The Game.
posted by hippybear at 3:19 PM on January 28 [9 favorites]

My vote for the definitive treatise on oranges and love goes to MFK Fisher. I can’t find it online, but the essay about warming each section on the radiator, and when you find an extra inner section, the secret kiss, you save it for…
posted by clew at 3:27 PM on January 28 [1 favorite]

The orange thing bothers me because I have had partners use my willingness to do small tasks to take advantage of me. Like, here is such a simple request, how can you even say no? And then there is another one a little later. And another, and another. The more often you say yes, the harder it gets to say no. And pretty soon, it's just what you do, and if you don't want to do the small thing, why not? It turns into a conflict. And you explain your feelings, and they agree to ask less from you. And then a week later, they are doing it again. And you end up feeling like you are crazy, because the tasks are really not that big, and everyone says you can just say no, its not a big deal.

Obviously not everyone asking a partner to peel an orange is going to do this, but for me personally it feels like something I need to watch out for because of how I can fall into this pattern.
posted by eruonna at 3:29 PM on January 28 [8 favorites]

I’ve become quite fond of sumo mandarins,

>sumo peel me a mandarin

SYNTAX ERROR
posted by straight at 4:05 PM on January 28 [15 favorites]

Turns out I'd much rather peel an orange my own damn self.
posted by MrVisible at 4:25 PM on January 28 [1 favorite]

Obviously not everyone asking a partner to peel an orange is going to do this, but for me personally it feels like something I need to watch out for because of how I can fall into this pattern.

That's...fine?

I mean, I gather from your tone that this is not reciprocal and that's really the issue. I totally do this but then so does my partner. And we've talked about it before so we're good and we'll probably talk about it again if either of our feelings change.

It does make me think that before we ask our partners to peel and orange for us, we should consider if we would do the same for them?

I'm going to assume that every ask.me of someone asking for romantic relationship advice for at least the next week will be doing so as a result of a request to peel an orange.
posted by VTX at 4:36 PM on January 28

I peel ruby red grapefruits for my wife occasionally. I even tear all the membranes off the juicy pithy parts, so they are similar to "supremes" except there's no knife involved. This is an amazing thing to eat and it takes some time to complete.

My wife usually can't eat the whole thing, so I do this for her as well as myself.
posted by SoberHighland at 5:03 PM on January 28 [3 favorites]

Is zesting the next step? Juicing? Ponzu sauce?
posted by fluttering hellfire at 6:03 PM on January 28 [1 favorite]

I do await the next TicTok trend based on the word "zesting".
posted by hippybear at 6:14 PM on January 28

Eating the peel is the sort of thing a psychopath would do in a movie to show they're unmoored to any conventional human buoy
posted by Sebmojo at 6:58 PM on January 28 [8 favorites]

Me: “will you peel me an orange?”
My partner: “is this an internet gimmick?”
posted by mai at 7:02 PM on January 28 [8 favorites]

Him, two minutes later: “well, now that we’ve been talking about it I kind of do want an orange but I have to keep icing my shoulder. Will you peel me one?”
posted by mai at 7:05 PM on January 28 [6 favorites]

I continue to be stuck on the idea that when I was living in Germany I learned that "peel an egg" was a colloquialism for either take a shit or let off a fart.

Such as "Ich pell mich ein Ei" meant to go lay a log?

But I can't back this up because searching has become less possible these days.

Anyway, "eating the peel" should be in with "suck as you bite" and "meat-detachment phase" as being far to suggestive for a Sunday.
posted by hippybear at 7:07 PM on January 28

Like, what kind of lame asshole partner won't even peel you a goddamn orange?

Yeah, I don’t know, like, I’m not sure if my partner would peel an orange for me because it’s not something I would ever ask for, but I know if I asked for like, sixteen glasses of water from the kitchen he would get them for me every time without complaining and if I asked for extra ice cubes he would get them. I just feel like the orange thing would seem like a weird test.
posted by corb at 7:27 PM on January 28 [1 favorite]

“Honey, will you cut me some cheese” doesn’t count either.
posted by waving at 7:29 PM on January 28

I’ve been single for so long that at this point I am skeptical that anyone in a long-term romantic relationship is enjoying themselves.
posted by rhymedirective at 7:30 PM on January 28 [6 favorites]

Oh goodness, it should be "Ich pell mir ein Ei."

#GrammarNa, er um... #GrammarStrictPerson
posted by hippybear at 7:34 PM on January 28 [1 favorite]

Peeling a lil cutie is part of the fun of eating em. A partner peeling it before handing it over would be robbing you of joy.
posted by GoblinHoney at 7:44 PM on January 28

this one's easy, Vito Corleone.
posted by clavdivs at 7:46 PM on January 28

Yeah, I rolled my eyes hard at this article. Everyone wants to look down their nose at people posting videos for fun, because its on TikTok and because its women doing the trend.

These types of tests have always been around. The first thing that popped in my head on reading the headline was this quote from A Bronx Tale (1993):

Sonny: Alright, listen to me. You pull up right where she lives, right? Before you get outta the car, you lock both doors. Then, get outta the car, you walk over to her. You bring her over to the car. Dig out the key, put it in the lock and open the door for her. Then you let her get in. Then you close the door. Then you walk around the back of the car and look through the rear window. If she doesnt reach over and lift up that button so that you can get in: dump her.

Calogero: Just like that?

Sonny: Listen to me, kid. If she doesnt reach over and lift up that button so that you can get in, that means shes a selfish broad and all youre seeing is the tip of the iceberg. You dump her and you dump her fast.
posted by bluloo at 7:47 PM on January 28 [5 favorites]

A colleague forgot her lunch once and her husband brought it in for her, and had included a little baggie with a peeled orange in it and I thought it was possibly the most romantic and somehow sexy thing I had ever witnessed. My lesbian ass fair swooned for it. I mentioned it to another colleague and she said "omg that's so controlling?!" and had the squick. Different strokes I guess.
posted by Iteki at 7:48 PM on January 28 [5 favorites]

We don’t usually keep oranges in the house, but my partner brought a bunch home from a friend’s place a couple weeks ago. He peeled a few for himself, and I’m the one who pointed out it’d be easier to eat them “soccer style” (cut into wedges, but sixths rather than quarters). Though I agree with his initial impulses— I’d rather eat unpeeled segments than cut open wedges.

Today I asked him to clean the microwave (after he had done the dishes and cleaned other kitchen surfaces), and he did it gladly. I think that’s a decent substitute for the TikTok test for us. Not that I needed it. He makes me a snack at least twice a week, and always slices the apple into 12 pieces, just like I like or.
posted by itesser at 8:12 PM on January 28

far too suggestive for a Sunday

terribly lubricious for a Sunday morning

did I miss some kind of memo about Sundays?
posted by cabbage raccoon at 8:39 PM on January 28 [1 favorite]

did I miss some kind of memo about Sundays?

I also don't like oranges. (If someone asked me to peel one they're getting a glass of juice at best, or more likely a ragged blob that used to be a fruit.)
posted by maxwelton at 8:54 PM on January 28 [1 favorite]

why is this on metafilter and why the Christ does it have 82 comments
posted by Bwentman at 9:21 PM on January 28 [2 favorites]

why is this on metafilter and why the Christ does it have 82 comments

Everyone knows that the Blue and orange are complementary colors. (I have found this whole discussion to be really interesting!)
posted by eponym at 9:43 PM on January 28 [4 favorites]

Everyone wants to look down their nose at people posting videos for fun

They're not posting videos for fun. They're posting videos for attention.
posted by Cardinal Fang at 9:55 PM on January 28 [6 favorites]

As Kurt Vonnegut pointed out, the internet has given us the answer to the old question 'Will a million monkeys banging on a million typewriters eventually produce the complete works of Shakespeare?'

Now, social media - and in particular TikTok - has given us the answer to another old question: 'If your friends told you to jump off a cliff, would you do it?'
posted by Cardinal Fang at 10:05 PM on January 28

And AI answers the question, 'If a million monkeys banging on a million typewriters eventually produce the works of Shakespeare, will people pre-order the sequel?'
posted by MrVisible at 11:29 PM on January 28 [1 favorite]

why is this on metafilter and why the Christ does it have 82 comments

Your right.
orange shirts will be issued tomorrow
posted by clavdivs at 11:39 PM on January 28

They're not posting videos for fun. They're posting videos for attention.

And? Human beings want to interact with other human beings. The way you attract other human beings to interact with is to get their attention. This fucking snobbish way of looking down on anyone who posts anything on social media is so tiring. And the thing is, so many of these comments are people who don't even use the platform in question. If you did, you'd know that the vast vast vast majority of videos posted on TikTok will get maybe 200 views and 1 or 2 likes. Oh no! So much attention! You see the handful that go viral enough to get an article written about them a month after the trend passed and think it's all like that, or that everyone is aiming for virality. But sometimes it's just fun to create something and put it out there in the world. (Let me guess, you don't think making a TikTok video is creative... fine, then sometimes it's just fun to participate in something other people are participating in, or learning a new skill like editing videos.)
posted by misskaz at 4:34 AM on January 29 [9 favorites]

Turns out I'd much rather peel an orange my own damn self.

I've never heard that particular euphemism before, but given the quality of the dating pool at the moment I think a lot of cis het women have reached the same conclusion. (That's kind of the point of the whole test.)
posted by The Bellman at 7:37 AM on January 29

Anybody try the tiktok thing where you cut the ends off an orange, then a cut down the side and then it just unrolls? It works pretty well, but it wastes a lot of fruit. So if your partner doesn't care about food waste, I recommend it.

Also supposedly the peel is full of fiber, if you can stomach it. Orange peels are super bitter. So is grape skin. The skin of a grape actually tastes terrible. That's fruit you should peel.
posted by The_Vegetables at 7:57 AM on January 29

it feels almost like every week there's another one of these tests and all i can think of is "are the straights okay? why are people with each other if it's just constant gender-based testing that seems to have a weird tinge of disdain?"

i don't remember if it was before or after i saw the "orange peel test" but there was the "ketchup on counter clean-up test" and before that was "name a woman/man test" and for the love of your partner if you're going to do small shit tests like this are you recording the data and putting them on a "no man/woman left behind" sort of kpi metric?
posted by i used to be someone else at 8:04 AM on January 29 [4 favorites]

are you recording the data and putting them on a "no man/woman left behind" sort of kpi metric?

Please someone go find the ancient thread about that date ranking app everyone (predictably) lost their minds about. I want to say it was called Lala or Lulu or something like that. I tried searching and couldn't find :(
posted by phunniemee at 8:22 AM on January 29

Please, please never let my wife see this.

In the past year I have made my wife something north of 365 margaritas. I don't make her one absolutely every day, but damn near, and many days I will make her multiples and if I travel out of town I will put some in a thermos so she has them while I'm away. If we're going on a road trip the thermos also gets filled so she can enjoy them while taking in a view of the countryside (she doesn't drive; we call these "cargaritas"). I have squeezed so many limes that I have had to start taking precautionary measures in order to avoid phytophotodermatitis.

I am also in charge of washing the dishes in our home so every margarita also adds six items which need washing (glass; knife; cutting board; measuring spoons; bowl for holding the lime juice so I can dip the rim if the glass in it; plate for holding the Tajin in which I dip the juiced rim).

I grew up the oldest of three and was in charge of looking after my younger siblings. She grew up the youngest of three and her older sisters were in charge of looking after her. When we started dating we almost immediately fell into a pattern where anything I did for her once just sort of became my job. I'm not mad about it; I have the sort of mind that cannot shut up unless I'm doing something productive and she gives me a lot of opportunities to be productive. She had been drinking beer and noticed margaritas have a better booze to calorie ratio so since I enjoy kitchen stuff I made her a margarita without taking into consideration that it would be something I'd be doing daily for the rest of my life. Since I'm also in charge of scheduling doctors' appointments it at least means I'll never have to make an appointment for scurvy on her behalf.

This is a long way of saying that I don't want to peel an orange for her because then I'm the orange peeler forever.
posted by Parasite Unseen at 9:59 AM on January 29 [10 favorites]

Every married person knows to do this test in reality, you first lay down for bed, get real comfortable and warm and ready to drift off to sleep, and then the question comes.
posted by The_Vegetables at 11:13 AM on January 29 [4 favorites]

Chez nous the question starts out "Nicky?" because that's how Nora Charles asks for midnight scrambled eggs.
posted by clew at 12:12 PM on January 29 [5 favorites]

Parasite unseen, save washing 365 dishes with this one weird trick: Between cutting the lime and squeezing it, you can just rub it on the rim of the glass to get the salt (or tajin whatever) to stick. Then just juice it directly into the glass.
posted by aubilenon at 12:44 PM on January 29 [2 favorites]

I did not even realize asking for 365 margaritas was an option. Wish me luck while I test my relationship.
posted by mittens at 12:48 PM on January 29 [18 favorites]

Maybe space them out a bit, rather than asking for all of them at once.
posted by Greg_Ace at 3:30 PM on January 29 [6 favorites]

"person drowns in bathtub full of margaritas"
posted by pyramid termite at 3:33 PM on January 29 [1 favorite]

Upside: no hangover!
posted by Greg_Ace at 4:04 PM on January 29

Maybe space them out a bit, rather than asking for all of them at once.

They're just li'l margaritas. It's not like they're... margaronas? margonas?
posted by GCU Sweet and Full of Grace at 4:33 PM on January 29 [1 favorite]

misskaz, you're fully entitled to that. Of course people can, and do, post for fun. I do apologise for the generalisation.
posted by Cardinal Fang at 5:43 PM on January 29 [1 favorite]

They're not posting videos for fun. They're posting videos for attention.
...
And? Human beings want to interact with other human beings. The way you attract other human beings to interact with is to get their attention. This fucking snobbish way of looking down on anyone who posts anything on social media is so tiring.

I think it's quite normal actually to dislike things done only for attention or people who only do things for attention. It's not everything on social media that is done for attention, but when something specifically is, I don't like it. Doing something for the sake of doing the thing is pretty awesome and cool to watch. Doing something for the attention of other people is not interesting.

People share things for alot of different reasons - I have an instagram and facebook because I live far away from my family, not because I want all my friends/followers to give me their attention for whatever BS I want to post (and sorry but after the first few orange peel test videos and some satire versions, everything else is just BS that wants attention)

(The people who are really good are the ones who are doing it for attention, but make it seem like they're doing it for the sake of doing the thing. That is an art and a skill.)
posted by LizBoBiz at 6:29 PM on January 29

I think it's quite normal actually to dislike things done only for attention or people who only do things for attention.

Right, so the great thing about the internet is, you don’t have to engage with it! If it’s not your thing, that’s cool, just means it’s not for you. Roll your eyes and move on. But one doesn’t need to leave a snarky comment on something (not referring to anyone in this thread, just in general!) and they certainly don’t need to write an entire article about it.

In short, don’t yuck on someone’s yum.
posted by bluloo at 6:43 PM on January 29