“Bert, one step into animorphing into Ernie.”

May 16, 2024 12:48 PM

The Ugly Muppet Toy Pageant 2024.
posted by ellieBOA (9 comments total)

These toys are extremely upsetting in a way I can't explain and I can't tolerate looking at them. But I also can't look away. Thank you for the deeply unsettling post.
posted by OrangeDisk at 2:11 PM on May 16, 2024 [2 favorites]

This post unglued me entirely. I’m broken.
posted by Suedeltica at 2:25 PM on May 16, 2024 [4 favorites]

Regarding the winner: I remember that 90s trend of children's stuffed animals being made of that thin, silky, cold, medicinal, polyester parachute material. I don't know why that was ever a good idea.
posted by AzraelBrown at 2:31 PM on May 16, 2024 [4 favorites]

The color commentary cracked me up.
posted by larrybob at 2:58 PM on May 16, 2024 [3 favorites]

You go to hell. All muppets are beautiful. All of them.

I’m just realizing that I am emotionally attached to both muppets and dolls of nonconventional attractiveness.
posted by Abehammerb Lincoln at 3:45 PM on May 16, 2024 [4 favorites]

“This isn’t Scooter. This is his attic-dwelling secret brother Segway.”

😆
posted by Greg_Ace at 4:12 PM on May 16, 2024 [6 favorites]

“If you squint your eyes hard enough, you don’t have to see this anymore.”
-Wilson S

Stealing that.
posted by The otter lady at 7:38 PM on May 16, 2024 [6 favorites]

This is top notch snark. As a fairly internet-poisoned individual, it can be hard to make me actually snicker when reading, but these people absolutely succeeded.
posted by foxtongue at 9:09 PM on May 16, 2024 [2 favorites]

Great find, thanks for posting! The comments are GOLD.
“This Scooter listens to exactly two kinds of music: Ben Folds, and ska.”

Agree with hippybear above re: How the F did these get licensed?
posted by cinnamonduff at 7:23 PM on May 17, 2024 [2 favorites]