The Last of Us + Breaking Bad + A Bug's Life: The Porn Parody

July 15, 2024 2:41 PM

Hyper-sexual "zombie cicadas" that are infected with sexually transmitted fungus expected to emerge this year.

Some of Brood XIX and Brood XIII, the cicada broods that are both emerging this year in some parts of the US, are infected with a fungus, Massospora cicadina, which can replace the lower abdomen of the bug with a mass of fungal spores. The infected cicadas then infect other cicadas by simulating mating activity. The fungus also produces a substituted amphetamine alkaloid, cathinone, thought to give the infected insects extra energy.

posted by Halloween Jack (15 comments total)

Surely this...
posted by Phssthpok at 2:47 PM on July 15 [8 favorites]

Are you sure this isn't the premise of a new Geraldo Rivera show?
posted by Greg_Ace at 3:04 PM on July 15

Well, here's one way to deal with the Adderall shortage!
posted by mittens at 3:10 PM on July 15 [2 favorites]

breaking bug
posted by wmo at 3:29 PM on July 15 [3 favorites]

like a flying hot Pocket filled with Viagra and methadrine.
posted by clavdivs at 3:51 PM on July 15 [7 favorites]

Sure, why not? Seems perfectly on-brand with this summer so far.
posted by senor biggles at 3:57 PM on July 15 [10 favorites]

Pretty sure “Horny Zombie Cicadas” isn’t on my Apocalypse Bingo Card. Are write-ins accepted?
posted by omegajuice at 4:03 PM on July 15 [3 favorites]

The cicadas have already come and gone where I am. I looked for ones with fungus butt but never found any, which I think I'm pretty happy about.
posted by Kutsuwamushi at 4:16 PM on July 15 [3 favorites]

Almost all trees benefit from mycorrhizae and since massospora helps the trees cicadas attack as well as itself, and since the cicada sits around underground for 13 to 17 years in direct contact with mycorrhizae, it’s tempting to guess that massospora evolved from mycorrhizae, but it’s not clear to me what trees could do to directly help massospora,or what they could have done to help it evolve.

Cicadas probably boast a pretty good arsenal of antifungals, however, and Pharma doesn’t.
posted by jamjam at 4:50 PM on July 15 [2 favorites]

Sure, why not? Seems perfectly on-brand with this summer so far.

We all laughed at the "Hoch Tua" girl, and now look where it's gotten us.
posted by PlusDistance at 8:58 PM on July 15 [2 favorites]

Is this a different batch than previously?
posted by MtDewd at 6:26 AM on July 16

No, MTDewd, but the link in the FPP is dead (some of the links in the comments are fine), and the tags didn't help me find it.
posted by Halloween Jack at 6:53 AM on July 16

I take from this that Hollow Knight is real and the fungi are conspiring to keep Silksong from being released and revealing more of their secrets.
posted by kewb at 7:20 AM on July 16 [1 favorite]

Ever since reading "Pilgrim at Tinker Creek", I've been seeing posts on Mefi that I wish I could forward to Annie Dillard. And she would get such a kick out of this too!
posted by of strange foe at 7:41 AM on July 16

I'd just like to mention that after the previous post, I got together with an old friend who's now a drummer, and we named our band "The Buttless Cicadas"
posted by MtDewd at 2:18 PM on July 16 [3 favorites]