Statistically, Arnold Schwarzenegger is better than Sylvester Stallone

September 8, 2024 1:34 AM

Who's the Greatest Actor in Movie History? A Statistical Analysis

See also: The Fall and Rise of Nicolas Cage: A Statistical Analysis

posted by chavenet (18 comments total)

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posted by tommasz at 3:43 AM on September 8 [2 favorites]

Who is the greatest American Hollywood film industry actor, FTFY
posted by GallonOfAlan at 3:53 AM on September 8 [5 favorites]

I was surprised when we got to the final list, which had only one woman on it, that they hadn’t gone “heck, maybe Box Office needs to be weighted or something.” “Greatest,” to me at least, suggests a degree of timelessness, and Box Office is a measure of popularity at a moment in time. Many high-grossing films from the past aren’t watched much anymore, and broadcast rights, media sales, streaming figures, etc should probably be added in for a sense of persistence, maybe divided by years the film’s been available. Also, adjusting Box Office for inflation would have kept older films on the chart. A wider Award net would have reduced the impact of the notoriously idiosyncratic Oscar process.

TL;DR: they needed to do more work to get on the “Greatest Statistical Analysis” chart.
posted by GenjiandProust at 4:22 AM on September 8 [6 favorites]

Thanks, I hated it… in that I thought the exercise was about as wrongheaded as it’s possible to get, but it was presented knowingly enough that I didn’t mind it, and it turned out to be somewhat thought-provoking. I did find myself evaluating my own personal criteria for acting, and though I didn’t reach any particular conclusions, it was fun to think about.
posted by Kattullus at 6:51 AM on September 8 [4 favorites]

Aw, man. I remember liking "stop! or my mom will shoot" as a kid. I didn't know it was a flop.

The rivalry aspect I had no idea about is also pretty amusing.
posted by howbigisthistextfield at 7:10 AM on September 8 [2 favorites]

To achieve our final result, we'll stack-rank every actor according to our three criteria and then take an average of these rankings

I don't have many big pet peeves, but averaging rankings is one.

You CANNOT do this. Rankings are ordinal variables and taking a mathematical mean of them is meaningless.
posted by yellowcandy at 7:21 AM on September 8 [18 favorites]

Throughout this analysis, I was often struck by the absurdity of quantifying something so personal, human, and deeply subjective: What's incredible about Meryl Streep's performance in Sophie's Choice, Heath Ledger's Joker, or Leonardo DiCaprio's breakout in Titanic cannot be quantified. So, what was the point of this entire exercise? In my opinion, it's the discourse, not the destination, that matters.

I think Parris acknowledges in the main link that this is a thought exercise, and that any methodology for a statistical analysis of "best actor" is going to be flawed. That is really all I ask of data nerds tackling these kind of questions, and it is a bar many of them cannot clear, so I'm not going to complain about the methodology.

Also, agreed that I love a petty Hollywood fued, especially between leading men, and was unaware of this one, so it was worth reading for that alone.
posted by the primroses were over at 8:50 AM on September 8 [2 favorites]

Also, agreed that I love a petty Hollywood fued, especially between leading men, and was unaware of this one, so it was worth reading for that alone.

It didn't stop them from going in on Planet Hollywood together, though.
posted by Navelgazer at 9:43 AM on September 8 [1 favorite]

Neither Arnold nor Stallone should be on any great actors list imo. Low bars? But what about Trump in Apprentice, is that award material too?
posted by nofundy at 10:13 AM on September 8 [2 favorites]

Trump in HOME ALONE 2.
posted by brundlefly at 12:29 PM on September 8 [1 favorite]

if only Lionel Barrymore acted in Alice doesn't work here anymore
posted by clavdivs at 2:36 PM on September 8 [1 favorite]

pffft -- not even a mention of Charlton Heston
posted by philip-random at 4:02 PM on September 8 [1 favorite]

I was expecting this clip of Charlton Heston's awesome acting.
posted by kirkaracha at 5:33 PM on September 8 [3 favorites]

Not surprised to see Brad Pitt way up there.

I had my own revelation a while ago. I consider myself a Dean Martin fan, yet I think much of his work is *terrible* (in TV, film, *and* song). OTOH, if asked, I would say I do not like Brad Pitt. Yet I like a large swath of his movies (and he's really good in them!).

I'm not sure what my point is but.
posted by mazola at 6:07 PM on September 8 [2 favorites]

Yes yes yes. This is fantastic. Yeah... Showing leadership capability. First you get the physique. Then you get the showcase. Then you get the blockbuster. Then you get multiple blockbusters. Then you get California. Let me tell you, this is my bag.
posted by ishmael at 7:09 PM on September 8 [1 favorite]

Aw, man. I remember liking "stop! or my mom will shoot" as a kid. I didn't know it was a flop.

Flashback to when I was 12 or 13 and our class got to watch a movie so a committee of responsible students went to rent the VHS over lunch. Everyone else wanted to rent Point Break but I wasn't sure that would be appropriate so I vetoed it and we ended up renting Stop! Or My Mom Will Shoot, and let's just say it was a good thing I was already very unpopular.
posted by Alvy Ampersand at 8:55 PM on September 8 [5 favorites]

"...lies, damn lies, and statistics."
posted by Ben Trismegistus at 11:08 AM on September 9 [1 favorite]

This is what you get when you can't measure something, so you measure something else instead.
posted by zompist at 1:51 PM on September 9 [4 favorites]