[Muffled]Aaaaahhhhhhhhhhhh[Muffled]

November 6, 2024 1:51 AM

Pillows to scream into, rated
posted by NotMyselfRightNow (43 comments total)

Pillows, freed
posted by chavenet at 3:02 AM on November 6 [8 favorites]

.

but also, we are not going back.
posted by bitslayer at 4:42 AM on November 6 [3 favorites]

America neither wants nor needs me. I am here against its will.
posted by East14thTaco at 5:08 AM on November 6 [9 favorites]

thanks, I needed that.
posted by heyitsgogi at 5:14 AM on November 6

Existence is Resistance. Be the community those people's kids will escape to.
posted by rikschell at 5:17 AM on November 6 [13 favorites]

@East14thTaco My heart is breaking right now. I don’t think people realize just how much we all need each other.
posted by heyitsgogi at 5:17 AM on November 6 [7 favorites]

Awoke this morning, saw news, actually threw up. Took a long walk in the rain sadly looking at lawn signs. Cycling in and out of nausea now. Cannot focus. Fear news of any kind.

This is what shock and grief feel like.

I’m just an isolated old childless cat lady. My heart goes out to those whose loved ones are even more profoundly affected. I cannot imagine their pain.

Other than lung-punishing amounts of weed and excessive attention given to my bird and cats (even they are starting to back away) I just don’t know how to deal.

Love to you all and thank you for just being out there.
posted by kinnakeet at 5:47 AM on November 6 [35 favorites]

I'm looking forward to this month's Giving Tuesday. I've lined up the recipients for my charitable donations for this year. I'm leaning heavily into food banks. I think they'll be needed.
posted by SPrintF at 5:52 AM on November 6 [4 favorites]

The advice for after Burning Man or coming down from taking ayahuasca:

Don't make any big decisions for the next 72 hours.
posted by AlSweigart at 6:02 AM on November 6 [24 favorites]

"The Cure For 2024 Election Anxiety". WSJ gated link, but here's the gist:

Remember that America has been through a lot, and if you think 2024 is a time of peak anxiety, you must be too young to remember 1968, with its riots and assassinations of Martin Luther King Jr. and Robert Kennedy. Yet the country made it through, and the same will be true this time, no matter who wins the White House. If the politically tumultuous past nine years have proved anything, it’s that America’s democratic institutions are strong and resilient.

Please let that be correct.
posted by Dean358 at 6:07 AM on November 6 [8 favorites]

"The Cure For 2024 Election Anxiety". ungated
posted by chavenet at 6:16 AM on November 6 [2 favorites]

“…you must be too young to remember 1968”.

I'm a baby boomer and have to say this is peak baby boomer perspective. In light of the Supreme Court ruling on the legality of all presidential orders, the US is now a vassal kingdom of Putin's Russia.
posted by brachiopod at 6:18 AM on November 6 [11 favorites]

Mod note: One comment removed. Yes things are grim, but let's avoid doomerism, thanks.
posted by Brandon Blatcher (staff) at 6:34 AM on November 6 [3 favorites]

Just wanted to share that I, too, am sick to my stomach. It’s a weird kind of grief — different than 2020 but also kind of the same. I am heartened, though, by the good and kind people who can see outside of themselves, and who we all need to cling to. Stay together, build community, take solace in how many other millions of people are mourning, and who truly want to make the world a better place. We must.
posted by knownassociate at 7:45 AM on November 6 [3 favorites]

Can I dream of Biden taking full advantage of the Supreme Court's decision re: Presidential Immunity to just do big things for the next 2 months. Send massive arms to Ukraine, send what you were going to send to Israel to Ukraine instead. Enact every immigrant protection you're capable of. Make Trump work to undo your good.
posted by drossdragon at 8:13 AM on November 6 [14 favorites]

If the politically tumultuous past nine years have proved anything, it’s that America’s democratic institutions are strong and resilient.

I'd love to hear more about this because from my perspective they have proven terrifyingly weak and precarious, often propped up only by tradition, not law.
posted by GoblinHoney at 8:14 AM on November 6 [20 favorites]

I went for a run this morning and the rage really made it a good run, and it burned off enough of the anxiety that I could clear my head enough to start thinking of next steps, who I want to help and support, how I want to do that, etc.

Now I’m laying around and the darkness is taking over again. I want to go run again but I know my body breaks easily, and I don’t want to end up trying to work through my anger on an elliptical in the gym — it really doesn’t have the same effect.

So if you can, go for a run.
posted by antinomia at 8:22 AM on November 6 [3 favorites]

This country, man. I just... fuck.
posted by Greg_Ace at 8:26 AM on November 6 [5 favorites]

Or a walk. I went down to the park near my house and cataloged birds for a bit while my backbrain worked through some ways to make things easier for my students.

Came back home, showered, implemented the ideas I had. Slowly working through some grading; if I get half of it done today I'll call that good.

I can't do much, but I can relieve a little stress for a few people.
posted by humbug at 8:32 AM on November 6 [7 favorites]

I'm scheduled to get some bloodwork done today...let's hope it doesn't come out boiling and frothy.
posted by Greg_Ace at 9:25 AM on November 6 [13 favorites]

Hope is a choice. Despair is how they win.
posted by gottabefunky at 9:28 AM on November 6 [6 favorites]

Today is a day to go outside and find something beautiful. Squeeze a pet, or if you’re lucky enough a person. Eat ice cream on the couch. Listen to Aretha sing “Amazing Grace.” More than anything, tell people you love them.
posted by gottabefunky at 9:30 AM on November 6 [3 favorites]

If you have Good Tea for special occasions, today is such an occasion. Break out the Good Tea.
posted by Too-Ticky at 9:38 AM on November 6 [5 favorites]

Fascism thrives on hopelessness. They cannot win unless they can convince normal people that their total victory is inevitable. Even in victory, they don't have the numbers to actually put their idiotic plans into motion unless right thinking people lay down in despair and allow them to. We all have a choice of whether to give this to them, or not.

And I hate to say it, but it's time to recognize that a DNC that can't beat the dumbest, most corrupt, most venal, most callow presidential ticket in American history doesn't deserve to be the official opposition. It's time to start making plans for something better, because this ain't it.
posted by 1adam12 at 9:51 AM on November 6 [9 favorites]

I appreciate everyone sharing positive messages today.
posted by Glinn at 9:54 AM on November 6 [6 favorites]

A plumbing issue arose mid-morning in my kitchen. Fortunately my plumber pal had a cancellation so he came right over.

Normally this would stress md out. Today I was grateful for the distraction. Problem was quickly addressed after which he and I commiserated and I realised he was even more upset than myself. “We just have to keep doing what we do well!” he said and gave me a hug and now I feel just a teensy bit better.

One gay friend declared stoically, “well, we aren’t starving, and bombs aren’t falling, yet. But this isn’t how I imagined spending my senior years.”
posted by kinnakeet at 9:56 AM on November 6 [5 favorites]

A $14.88 MyPillow: 0 stars
posted by farlukar at 9:56 AM on November 6

Childless Cat Lady who doesn't even have her own cat here.

I went for a slow walk, and even didn't think about the election - for a minute or two at a time - this morning.

I visited my dad in the nursing home and we talked a little about the usual nothings, and he held my hand for 40 minutes.

I finally managed to down a bowl of watery Cream of Wheat at about half past noon, and I think it will stay down.

I need to disconnect for a day or two or...

I am thinking about what somebody suggested recently: Do what you can for those most vulnerable.

Still breathing. Have not screamed yet.
posted by jaruwaan at 9:56 AM on November 6 [6 favorites]

Unfortunately arthritis chose yesterday to screw up my left knee. Otherwise I might have taken a mental health day off work today and gone for a walk around my favorite lake with some soothing music on the earbuds, or maybe just the sound of birds and the wind in trees.

So instead it's the heating pad, the soothing music, tea, and crying while I debug code. I may need a Steven Universe rewatch marathon after my shift though.
posted by Foosnark at 10:06 AM on November 6 [2 favorites]

it's time to recognize that a DNC that can't beat the dumbest, most corrupt, most venal, most callow presidential ticket in American history doesn't deserve to be the official opposition
Yes and no. Pretty sure it's the enormous amounts of wealth, power, long-simmering anger and longterm planning behind this ticket. Their willingness, even glee, to cheat and lie and deny. Are we supposed to become that? I don't think so, but.
posted by Glinn at 10:13 AM on November 6 [5 favorites]

Mine came out, pretty much all unbidden, while searching for stuff in the fridge. Can't recommend it, hardly any muffling at all, and the carrots don't like being screamed at.
posted by aesop at 11:05 AM on November 6 [5 favorites]

the carrots don't like being screamed at

I would think they don’t carrot all.
posted by bendy at 11:21 AM on November 6 [24 favorites]

My county’s now on fire, so nature has also made its thoughts known.
posted by ovenmitt at 11:26 AM on November 6

I’m leaning into community care and small acts of kindness today. My gym will also be seeing a lot of me for…a while.
posted by sugarbomb at 12:13 PM on November 6 [1 favorite]

Working on processing this morning. I thought I was calm, centered and ready for what came. And I was, a little, but there seems to be an indigestible core of denial, fear, but mostly, I think, sadness rumbling down below.

There are a few thoughts bouncing around in there:

They are strong, I am weak. This sounds hopeless, defeatist, but it's not. I am one person. Alone, I am no match for a well organized group of angry, organized and extremely well financed people hungry for power and change. I can't take them on by myself, there is no exhaust port I can shoot just like Womp Rats in Beggars Canyon, so: Don't beat myself up for not single-handedly fixing this mess.

We are stronger together. The companion to thought one is, I am not alone. To make the world better, we're going to need to organize in a thousands of ways, local, national to make positive change in a darkening landscape. But, in a nod to thought one, I can't join (or more to the point, join and be useful to) a thousand organizations. I have to use whatever skills I have, pick the places where those skills can be of good use, and don't try to shoulder the entire burden.

Don't take worry out on credit. Things are going to suck. Don't assume all the things are going to suck at the same time, or to the same degree. Work on the areas I know to be at risk, but try to minimize the amount of unproductive worry that eats energy that I could use to otherwise be used to put something good into the world.

Community, community, community. I flirted with prepperism most of my adult life (I grew up in the cold war, of course i did), until one day I read a fantastic article, lost to the mists of time and the vagaries of digital information storage, from a prepper who traveled to South America, and talked with people in various stages of societal dysfunction. His conclusion was pretty simple: When the shit hits the fan, you are going to be no match for the angry, well-trained guys with a guns. The only way to create some sense of safety in the midst of chaos is to be part of a strong community. It doesn't make me safe (the whole fantasy of Prepping), but it makes everyone safer. And happier. Talk to neighbors, make eye contact, help neighbors when they need help. Become someone in your local community that people turn to with certain problems. Make someone dinner, help install a wheelchair ramp, help someone mend a work uniform. Or just be a good listener. Whatever skills I have, use them locally.

It's a marathon, not a sprint. The future is unknowable. Maybe the collapse of hypercapitalism and the dawn of a green utopia is right around the corner, but the view from here is that we're a long way off. So, I must pace myself. There will be times where sprinting is necessary, and I'll need energy for those moments.

Don't forget to laugh at people in power when they need laughing at.

Support local libraries; rough times ahead.

From a friend in 12 step: Put your own oxygen mask on before helping others. I can't be of service to others if I'm a dysfunctional mess. Self-care is critical.

Everyone in the country, regardless of how they voted, is reacting to the same circumstances (even if our bubbles and biases portray them in different lights). Income inequality, hypercaptitalism eating the world (and burning it). The enemy is not everyone. Break out of the bubble. Fuck Zuckerberg and Musk, talk to people face-to-face. Changing people's minds on the internet is not working.

Finally, even in a dark timeline, there is room for joy. Be a joyful warrior.

Be safe out there.
posted by chromecow at 12:25 PM on November 6 [19 favorites]

Also unable to focus and my abdominal pain is off the chart. My brain is still fighting to remain in a weird dissociative fugue, but my body is working so hard to maintain that protective state that I’m about to fall asleep. Thank the universe I am the worst puker or I would be asleep in the bathroom with my head on the toilet seat and toast vomit in my hair.
posted by tingting at 12:46 PM on November 6 [2 favorites]

Sorry to hear that, tingting. Hope you get some relief.
posted by Glinn at 1:33 PM on November 6 [1 favorite]

Finding whatever solace I can. Right now, this poem by Tony Hoagland is working for me. There was also a beautiful article Ben Collins posted about Thoreau that got me through the morning.

Stay safe out there. As Tony says, our survival is their failure.
posted by sedimentflux at 1:52 PM on November 6

If you have a PC, and you are looking for a nice, calm, soothing game, which might take your mind off things, may I recommend Tiny Glade? It's really more of a toy, so it's probably not going to suck you in for hours, or prevent you from taking whatever actions you need to take, but I bought a copy last night and I found that it occupied my mind just enough... The effect was not unlike a pleasant walk in the woods (which I also very much recommend!) Unfortunately there's no mac version, but there are a million billion youtube videos.

I would be interested in hearing about similarly pleasant games.
posted by surlyben at 1:58 PM on November 6 [1 favorite]

Surlyben
I really enjoy entanglement, you can find it here: https://entanglement.gopherwoodstudios.com/en-US-index.html (also I find the music soothing).

I visited my dad in the nursing home and we talked a little about the usual nothings, and he held my hand for 40 minutes.
Jaruwaan, this is one of the few things today that made me happy*, thank you for sharing it.

*along with my wonderful 15 year old daughter telling me "love you" as I dropped her off at school this morning
posted by BigHeartedGuy at 2:22 PM on November 6 [5 favorites]

I think I can contribute something to this discussion.

On "cozy" games, these are a few I have played myself:

Townscaper is about drawing villages. It's like a simplified version of Tiny Glade.

Dorfromantik is about building a landscape with tiles.

Abzu is about swimming in the sea in different biomes. It has a short storie, and there are some scary segments avoiding enemies, but it is beautiful, and it has a "meditation" mode where you can simply swim with colorful fishes.

My Time at Sandrock is a building game: your character is "Builder" in a remote village in the desert, and your task is to build things for your neighbors, create strong bonds with them and make the village a better place to live . There is some easy combat, and the tasks you carry out for your neighbors are time limited, so it's entertaining and charming, but not always relaxing.

There are other building games, like Satisfactory and Dyson Sphere Program, where the difficulty can be lowered, so that the emphasis is on building things. I find it very calming, a bit like playing with lego.

And to everyone in this discussion: please, take care of yourselves and your loved ones. From the other side of the Atlantic, I wish you all the best in these times.
posted by LaVidaEsUnCarnaval at 1:35 AM on November 7 [1 favorite]

I've posted this before but it seems to fit here.

Here is my list of ten things that give me satisfaction. This is not a 'must do all of these every day' list. This is an 'if I'm in need of something that makes me feel better, these are good options' list. Maybe you'll find it useful too.

1) Make something (can be very small or simple, can also be music or written words)
2) Learn something new (can also be very small; for example, a new word)
3) Repair something or fix a problem
4) Find a proper place to keep something and put it there
5) Clean something that needs cleaning (maybe pick up some trash on a walk?)
6) Help someone to do something
7) Surprise someone (for example, send them a card)
8) Spend time with an animal or do something for them (feed birds?)
9) Do something that you know future you will appreciate
10) Do something that's good for your health
posted by Too-Ticky at 8:46 AM on November 7 [5 favorites]

Looks like it's time for me to break out this shirt again...
posted by Greg_Ace at 2:18 PM on November 7 [2 favorites]