Hating Dick Cheney

August 13, 2004 11:12 PM

Hating Dick Cheney - Our vice president is so widely hated as being an evil puppeteer, but this seems to be far from the truth. He's really "a frazzled, heart attack survivor who's barely hanging on—to life, his job, his position, his sense of self-esteem."
posted by MrAnonymous (51 comments total)

Just a disclaimer: I'm a big fan of Dick Cheney.
posted by MrAnonymous at 11:13 PM on August 13, 2004

Oh, go fuck yourself...
posted by spilon at 11:21 PM on August 13, 2004

Metafilter: Proof 4 year olds shouldn't be allowed to vote.
posted by techgnollogic at 11:28 PM on August 13, 2004

"People respond to him the way Mermaid Man, the senile spoof superhero on Spongebob Squarepants, responds to wrongdoers: with a bellowing cry of "Eeeeevvviiillll!" "

It's true. I can't help but say it every time his visage passes my conscious eyes. As to the rest of the article, I think Nick has been drinking too much kool-aide.
posted by dejah420 at 11:31 PM on August 13, 2004

10.) Always vote incumbents out. CHANGE IS GOOD!


Hahahahahhahaha!
posted by Steve_at_Linnwood at 11:31 PM on August 13, 2004

Metafilter: Proof 4 year olds shouldn't be allowed to vote

Thanks for reminding us that y'all got nothin'.
posted by Space Coyote at 11:34 PM on August 13, 2004

Oh, go fuck yourself...

I'm sorry. Maybe you got the impression that this post was a positive commentary on Dick Cheney. I strongly disagree with the article, but I found it very interesting. Thus my disclaimer.
posted by MrAnonymous at 11:40 PM on August 13, 2004

Ummm.... wasn't spilon referring to this?
posted by ALongDecember at 11:51 PM on August 13, 2004

Apparently the satire inherent in the afformentioned comment is lost on MrAnonymous.

Although I am not a fan of Dick Cheney, I found both linked articles a bore.
posted by Eekacat at 11:55 PM on August 13, 2004

(By the way, very funny New Yorker piece about fictional events following the exchange between Cheney and Leahy)
posted by ALongDecember at 11:55 PM on August 13, 2004

The obvious can be so subtle. Or I'm an idiot.
posted by MrAnonymous at 11:59 PM on August 13, 2004

Insightful, but I think there's a bit of denial when he tries to act like it's business as usual for the Vice President to be profiting directly from a war. I mean, business as usual post-Ulysses Grant administration.
posted by inksyndicate at 12:04 AM on August 14, 2004

The best thing about this article is the Suck piece it links to. Have I mentioned lately how much I miss Suck?
posted by kjh at 12:06 AM on August 14, 2004

Yeah the writer seemed to be trying a little too hard to establish his independent creds.
posted by Space Coyote at 12:10 AM on August 14, 2004

it certainly showed a side of Cheney that I hadn't before seen.

If you believe his thin, probably satirical description, I guess. Of course, I'd love to believe that Cheney really is a maalox guzzling yes-man, but somehow I don't believe that the CEO of Halliburton fits that profile. And I agree with Inksyndicate, shameless war profiteering is not an "oh well, boys will be boys" issue.

I do believe that perhaps there is a tug of war over Bush's ear between Ashcroft and Cheney, each representing a segment of the administration that doesn't always have the same objectives (to say the least!). Powell, was knocked out of this contest in the qualifying round, btw.
posted by sic at 1:39 AM on August 14, 2004

The Suck link is hilarious:

"I'm proud to have sacrificed my own sacrifice so that others could sacrifce"!


This should be the tagline for all Iraq warbloggers!
posted by sic at 1:43 AM on August 14, 2004

Heh. MrAnonymous loves dick...
posted by insomnia_lj at 3:04 AM on August 14, 2004

"Powell, was knocked out of this contest in the qualifying round, btw."

And so was Rice, apparently.

Somehow, it's so much more comforting to hear what a bunch of old rich white men have to say if it's filtered through black conservatives.

It's like trying to discern the sound of a tuba being played in a moss-covered three-handled family gradunza... sure, nobody's ever seen one before in real life, but it sure makes the tuba sound different!
posted by insomnia_lj at 3:15 AM on August 14, 2004

I just had the thought, you know we've all been assuming that Cheney was some sort of puppet-master mastermind controlling every aspect of this administration's policies. But reading this, and thinking about it a little more made me realize that this is exactly how an administration would act if it was completely beholden to lobbyists and campaign contributors. Cheney isn't so much a cold, calculating schemer, rather he's the in-over-his-head yes man who is running around trying to keep all of the Republican party backers happy, not being able to tell any of them to settle down and have patience for the good of the party. We see all of the nastier aspec`ts of the republican base each getting their way all at once, something we hadn't seen before this, and perhaps it's only because Cheney and the rest are too weak to stand up to them.
posted by Space Coyote at 4:49 AM on August 14, 2004

He had me reading until I got to the line about my senator (Pat Leahy) being a "schmuck".
posted by paddbear at 4:55 AM on August 14, 2004

The best thing is the link to that Agnew ad. Wow. And I thought all those attack ads with sinister narrators that we have now are bad.

Can you imagine a Kerry commercial just showing Cheney with the Star Wars imperial theme? Or a soundtrack of people whimpering?
posted by CunningLinguist at 5:08 AM on August 14, 2004

The best thing is the link to that Agnew ad. Wow. And I thought all those attack ads with sinister narrators that we have now are bad.

I agree. MOMI is an awesome resource. What an ad.

Can you imagine a Kerry commercial just showing Cheney with the Star Wars imperial theme? Or a soundtrack of people whimpering?

I can imagine that circumstance, never mind a commercial.
And don't forget, Kerry's pattern of running a race is to keep positive most of the way, then at the end pile on the blows thick and fast. I have faith he'll keep to that pattern.
posted by Busithoth at 7:32 AM on August 14, 2004

It's hard to read that article and not come away with the opinion that its author is a dull-minded simpleton whose understanding of relatively complex issues never quite seems to penetrate the surface. Seriously, how uninformed is:

the ongoing flap about Kerry's service record shows that even doing a hitch in Vietnam is no unambiguous plus

Gillespie can't see past the Rove inspired-spin of the Swift Boat Veterans for "Truth", and basically carries water for the Administration he pretends "not to be a fan of" but moronically rephrasing their talking points. What a waste of time. If I want this kind of insight I'll watch the local news.
posted by psmealey at 7:55 AM on August 14, 2004

Agreed, the Agnew link is priceless. Politics should be more negative like this all the time...I'm tired of candidates pretending like they're shocked that the other side is insulting them. Turning the race into a contest to see who is most "optimistic" is lame.
posted by inksyndicate at 8:25 AM on August 14, 2004

He had me reading until I got to the line about my senator (Pat Leahy) being a "schmuck".

Patrick Leahy is the biggest schmuck in Congress. If I could pick one person, out of all 435, to kick out of Congress it would be Leahy. Even over Ed Kennedy.
posted by MrAnonymous at 9:34 AM on August 14, 2004

i could help him with that self-esteem issue. no really. honest.
posted by quonsar at 9:40 AM on August 14, 2004

Sure, Cheney exudes the paunchy, late-middle-age menace of a stereotypical businessman villain...

...and he lives in an underground bunker. ok, maybe this is all appearance, but by all appearances he is evil. He looks like a villain, lives like a villain, talks like a villain, and is associated with some things that appear to be evil.

Why should it seem strange that people think he's evil?

Also, not mentioned are his assertions of a non-existent al Qaeda/Iraq tie, he made the call to take down the hijacked planes while Bush read "My Pet Goat", or Halliburton's ties dealing with Iran.

...behind every great fortune is, if not a crime, then some sort of shady, dubious, or semi-embarrassing dealings, ranging from ambulance-chasing...

Suing companies that make a drain that rips the intestines out of a 6 year old girl is ambulance chasing? This article is awful.
posted by destro at 10:20 AM on August 14, 2004

I think Metafilter needs to be more sensitive towards Cheny.

Oh wai...
posted by tapeguy at 5:27 AM on August 15, 2004

If I could pick one person, out of all 435, to kick out of Congress it would be Leahy. Even over Ed Kennedy.

Well, gee. Coming from a "big fan" of Cheney, that's a shocker. That is just one too many stunning revelations for a single FPP to be allowed to have.
posted by psmealey at 5:30 AM on August 15, 2004

"this intense reaction has always puzzled me ...
Make no mistake: There's plenty to find detestable."

NEXT!
posted by anser at 7:19 AM on August 15, 2004

Just when I think I've seen it all an article asking me to feel sorry for Cheney.... Give me a break. This guy is despicable for too many reasons to list.
posted by xammerboy at 8:19 AM on August 15, 2004

Dick Cheney is a BIOOTTTCHH
posted by mikojava at 8:44 AM on August 15, 2004

This guy is despicable for too many reasons to list.

Can I get one? Maybe even two? Seriously.
posted by MrAnonymous at 9:15 AM on August 15, 2004

I like Cheney, he scares me and I like that. We need more fear and less namby-pamby in our foreign policy.

I saw John Edwards little bus/caravan passing by the other day and it did not seem very vice-presidential to me.
posted by clavdivs at 11:11 AM on August 15, 2004

Just a disclaimer: I'm a big fan of Dick Cheney.

The obvious can be so subtle. Or I'm an idiot.

If I could pick one person, out of all 435, to kick out of Congress it would be Leahy. Even over Ed Kennedy.

This guy is despicable for too many reasons to list.

Can I get one? Maybe even two? Seriously.

Do you have any idea what you are even talking about? Ed Kennedy? Having no idea about one of the biggest stories (go fuck yourself) of your sweetheart in years? Being bewildered at even possible reasons people would think Cheney was evil?

I'm going to have to go with the "you're an idiot" you posted above.

You're either a first class troll or a third rate citizen. Educate yourself and then come back and sit at the adults table.
posted by Ynoxas at 12:09 PM on August 15, 2004

Ed Kennedy?

Kick Leahy out of congress?
posted by PinkStainlessTail at 12:19 PM on August 15, 2004

(Wait, that looks stupid. Leahy is in congress, but he's one of 200 senators, not 435 congressmen. You actually have 635 to choose from is what I'm saying.)
posted by PinkStainlessTail at 12:24 PM on August 15, 2004

Sorry, Pink, it's only 100 Senators.
posted by scottymac at 12:53 PM on August 15, 2004

We need more fear and less namby-pamby in our foreign policy.

Yeah, because fear cultivates respect and obedience rather than cultivate more resentment and outrage. Good call there, guy.
posted by psmealey at 1:36 PM on August 15, 2004

He's really "a frazzled, heart attack survivor who's barely hanging on—to life, his job, his position, his sense of self-esteem."

This stuff happens to evil villains too.
posted by destro at 2:32 PM on August 15, 2004

Well, Julius Caesar said "Let them hate, so long as they fear" and Machiavelli said "It is better to be feared than loved."
But Machiavelli also said best of all is to be loved AND feared.

Right about now, we've got very little love, and insufficient fear to make up for that fact. I'm hoping Kerry will start the process of changing that, on both counts.
posted by bashos_frog at 2:44 PM on August 15, 2004

Our vice president

Our?
He's not my Vice President. He's the USA's.
And any one from the USA who admired him is a complete idiot. I can't imagine a person more unfit for the White House or any position of power, and that includes your President (but don't get me wrong, Dubya would be high up the "unfit for power" list as well).
posted by tomcosgrave at 2:53 PM on August 15, 2004

Conventional Wisdom in 2000: ... When Bush aides talk about Cheney as "a leadership pick" and as someone who represents the "integrity" and "civility" of a pre-Clinton-Gore era in Washington....The Cheney brand stands for quiet counsel...

Conventional Wisdom in 2004: The most obvious reason for Bush to dump Cheney is that it would help him with swing voters. Cheney is a polarizing figure. More than anyone else in the Bush administration, it is Cheney (and his aides) who acted like hot dogs in the run-up to Gulf War II. It was Cheney who insisted, based on "stovepiped" raw intelligence, that Saddam was on the verge of building nuclear weapons. It was Cheney who opposed more firmly than anyone else all attempts to bring the United Nations on board. It was Cheney who insisted, more loudly than anyone else, that Iraq was linked to 9/11 and urged Powell to present unpersuasive evidence on this point to the United Nations. It was Cheney who, as Chatterbox demonstrated yesterday, usurped the president and made the final decision to go to war. It is officials working in Cheney's office who reportedly are the likeliest White House aides to be indicted for leaking, for political purposes, the identity of CIA employee Valerie Plame. (On another front, it's also Cheney who told Treasury Secretary Paul O'Neill that we learned from the Reagan administration that deficits don't matter.)
posted by amberglow at 3:10 PM on August 15, 2004

deficits don't matter... as long as you bring in a fiscal conservative (i.e.: a Democrat) to clean up the fiscal mess of a Republican administration. There was a thread on here a long time ago where someone said that Dick Cheney was one of the most intelligent men alive. That claim still somehow manages both to annoy and amuse me.
posted by psmealey at 3:18 PM on August 15, 2004

Sorry, Pink, it's only 100 Senators.

Wow. Instant karma totally reamed me.
posted by PinkStainlessTail at 4:12 PM on August 15, 2004

Don't take it so hard, Pink, I can't tell you how many times I have heard from some genuinely intelligent people over the years that there are 52 states in the Union.
posted by psmealey at 4:22 PM on August 15, 2004

Kick Leahy out of congress?

I meant to type 535, not 435. I meant Congress as a whole. My mistake.

Ed Kennedy?

Oddly enough, Ted Kennedy's name is Edward. Goodness.

Just to irritate you further, Ynoxas, I educate myself by listening to Rush Limbaugh and Sean Hannity and by reading Jonah Goldberg and George Will. I well know of Cheney's cursing. I guess I was unprepared for spilon's non-sequitur. But I have to ask: do work at being an ass or does it come naturally?
posted by MrAnonymous at 4:44 PM on August 15, 2004

I dunno about Ynoxas, but you, Mr.Anonymous must have natural talent when it comes to being an ass - only an ass would bother coming on to MeFi and deliberately bait people...haven't you got anything better to do?
posted by tomcosgrave at 5:06 PM on August 15, 2004

only an ass would bother coming on to MeFi and deliberately bait people...haven't you got anything better to do?

That's all MeFi is anymore. Or at least liberals pandering to liberals. I do have better things to do than hang around here. See ya.
posted by MrAnonymous at 6:41 PM on August 15, 2004

I educate myself by listening to Rush Limbaugh and Sean Hannity and by reading Jonah Goldberg and George Will.

An ass and a fool. Good riddance.
posted by psmealey at 7:16 PM on August 15, 2004

The new batch are getting weaker. Perhaps trolls who don't believe in darwinism don't benefit from it either.
posted by Space Coyote at 3:02 AM on August 16, 2004