Angry webcam justice

August 22, 2004 9:17 PM

The most recent post on Brendan Grant's site is an unfortunate one: "For those who do not know, back on July 12th I had my house broken into." The full story is over here, but it has a upside: Grant recently picked up a used webcam that takes shots automatically when someone walks past, and caught the break-in.
posted by mathowie (29 comments total)

At least he has pictures (proof).

My bike was stolen from my front porch a few months ago (lock was clipped). I've since put up a video camera that captures clips when any motion is detected. So far it's been all birds, cats, and passing traffic (pedestrian and vehicular), but the next time some slimeball decides to snoop around on my front porch, I'll have footage of his sorry ass to take to the cops.

I've also made the camera quite visible in the window as an extra deterrant to any potential thieves.
posted by mrbarrett.com at 9:30 PM on August 22, 2004

How frustrating. But meaningless. But frustrating for the victim...
posted by volk at 10:02 PM on August 22, 2004

His little schpiel about how awful she is is a little (lot) over the top. I mean yes, it sucks she broke into your place mr webcam person, and it sucks she stole your $50 in spare change, but. She didn't exactly kill anyone.

Still, it's fun that his paranoid webcam thing pulled off.

Also, this is why all the people that buy shotguns for "home defense" scare me.

Lesson: petty crime is dumb, the payoff is not worth the possible repurcussions. Personally, my cutoff point is a single crime with a gross payoff of $10 million. That'd be worth it.
posted by kavasa at 12:03 AM on August 23, 2004

Let's see...repeat offender, multiple burglaries, tried to sic the cops on him to deflect attention from her own crimes... So what if he's pleased she's been caught? The dude seems to have kept a good sense of humor about the experience. Good for him. Money or not, B&E is an invasion of one's personal space. Even if she'd done nothing more than rifle through the sock drawer, the idea of anyone wandering freely through the house taking or doing whatever has got to be rather unnerving.

Is this motion-detection feature typical in webcams now? I didn't realize the technology had advanced to that point. Handy.
posted by nakedcodemonkey at 12:27 AM on August 23, 2004 [1 favorite]

This is when you can extort someone for a lot more than $50.
posted by lightweight at 1:22 AM on August 23, 2004

There are more than a few pieces of webcam software that do motion detection and capture, along with remote archiving, broadcasting, emailing on capture and more. It's not typically a hardware webcam function, usually it's a software function.

Many years ago I used a totally oldschool Connectix Quickcam, some webcam software I don't remember, and my old 486/66 to catch my nosy landlord rifling through my stuff.

Being a fair sport, I even had a sign hanging down just inside the door that read something like "Warning! Due to blatantly obvious disturbances and rifling of stuff, this apartment is now under automated video survellience beyond this point. These images are automatically sent to a remote location for safekeeping." - or something to that effect, basically noting: A) You're being surveilled. B) If you try to destroy/steal the computer to destroy the evidence, I'll have pics of you doing it. C) If you're going to burgle, at least have the decency and skill to not be a clumsy git about it.

The landlady-manager didn't seem to grasp that being manager didn't put her above California renter's law, such as at least 24 hours written or verbal notice before entering a property. (I had confronted her about it before. "Someone's been in my room. Was it you?" "Uh, err, noooo?"

She had the audacity to be pissed off at me for daring to set up survellience in my room. I had the audacity to move out ASAP and leave my place a mess for her.

I've recommended webcams and motion capture software to both family and friends for a variety of situations, from peeping toms to repeat vandals to theives and other social irritants. Like that guy who urges his dog to poop on your lawn repeatedly for whatever inexplicable reason.

It's also a great way to get goofy pictures of your pets and see how they amuse themselves while you're away.
posted by loquacious at 1:24 AM on August 23, 2004

Uff da, I'm not sure who I feel creepiest about in this scenario, or whom I should feel sorry for. This is very stalkerporn about someone who broke into one's home, which is certainly understandable to a point. I've had shit jacked before and its certainly not nice and you certainly feel violated, but I didn't set out to have anyone hung or crucified for the personal affront.

By the by, that loss was better hidden, more expensive and highly more personally dear (irreplaceable, actually, and representative of no small amount of personal drama) than a plain-in-sight coffee can full of change.

Clearly the perp needs some serious guidance counsuling as she is clearly in need of wholesome activites and some direction in her life. A/C bumping is clearly a hobby of hers -- she thought the place interesting and decided to go inside to take a look.

Note to Brendan: I don't think you are getting your change back, buddy.
posted by Ogre Lawless at 1:55 AM on August 23, 2004

I think he has the right to be pleased that he caught a neighbor breaking into his place, and if this is "stalkerporn", then what the hell is the Peterson trial of which we all have to hear every little detail on a daily basis? It almost sounds like you are blaming the victim for catching the perp and being happy about it. I say good for him for using his cam for security and catching her. I've set mine up that way a few times when both my husband and I were going to be away for a few days.

And yeah, you learn a lot about your pets by going through the pics. :D
posted by Orb at 2:18 AM on August 23, 2004

I've been trying this out: Webcam Monitor. Though at $50 USD its a bit much. However, if you can find one of these, you can set your surveillance to music, or at least customized sound effects.
posted by piskycritter at 5:34 AM on August 23, 2004

He sounds like kind of a dick, IMO. She's just a kid. "libeling me in the official record of the event and making such claims to a police officer"? That's just silly. The cop asked her a question and she answered it.
posted by jpoulos at 5:48 AM on August 23, 2004

Yeah, he is a bit of a dick. I'd personally chalk the $50 up to experience, well worth the fun of catching a thief. It was an interesting story, though.

The Dude: Do you find them much, these stolen cars?
Younger Cop: Sometimes! Wouldn't hold out much hope for the tape deck, though.
Older Cop: Or the Creedence.
posted by RylandDotNet at 6:28 AM on August 23, 2004

She answered the cop's question with a ridiculous excuse, jpoulos. She may be a kid, but she's a messed up one. Hopefully she'll be getting some court-ordered help. I can't blame the guy for being mad, though he didn't lose a significant amount of money.

I don't worry much about getting my place buglarized. Thieves look for cash, drugs, guns, electronics and jewellery, in that order. I never leave even a penny anywhere but in my wallet, which I always have with me. No thief is going to be interested in my no-name brand ibuprofen. I don't have any guns. I don't have a television. Nor a microwave. Nor a stereo. They won't bother to take the ghetto I bought at Cash Converters for $40, nor my computer, which is at least five or six years old (I bought it used three years ago for $300), nor my 20-year-old box camera. And I don't have a single piece of jewellery with a resale value of more than $20.

I figure they'll either smash the place up out of pique, or leave me some money out of pity.
posted by orange swan at 6:31 AM on August 23, 2004

but. She didn't exactly kill anyone.

She libeled him, saying she broke in because there was blood on the walls and he was doing drugs, ergo she stole $50. If someone smeared me like that, I'd... I'd publish her photo all over the internet is what I'd do!
posted by brownpau at 6:45 AM on August 23, 2004

What's the difference between this & many other burglaries?

He has camera.
posted by dash_slot- at 7:44 AM on August 23, 2004

Ogre Lawless: Interesting, considering your handle. Alignment = Chaotic?

But I agree on some level. Up to 10 years in a state prison for $50 bucks in loose change? I'm sure the whole prison culture experience will do wonders for her "rehabilitation" and teach her to always love and respect authority and the law.

However, that whole "he was in drugs" and "blood smeared on the walls" crap stinks to hell of something a tweaker or crackhead would say. (Or, say, the child of a tweaker or crackhead.) "BUT HE WORSHIP THE DEVIL! HE HAS HALF EATEN BABIES IN HIS FRIDGE! HE TOUCHED MY DOG INAPPROPRIATELY! I'M THE VICTIM!"

Though, I strongly disagree that she has an "A/C bumping" hobby. She probably has a pretty serious drug/alcohol/cash hobby. The place looked "interesting"? For fuck's sake, it's an occupied apartment, not a abandoned steel mill. Take a picture or ask nicely.

If this had happened to me, I'd directly inject the unholy fear of C'thulhu into her carapace through the wonders of advanced technology and superior firepower. Nothing a little Japanese terrorcore death noise rock turned up to eleven and a half wouldn't fix. Maybe a little Tetsuo: The Iron Man on an AB loop, or some Negativland "Car Bomb", or some Merzbow or Milk Cult or Marafura Fufunjiru. Maybe some Halfer Trio or Nurse with Wound.

I don't think I'd post her pic and whinge on the internet about $50 bucks in loose change stolen by a crackbaby, though. At least not like that. I mean, seriously. Get creative if you're going to do this kind of stuff. Fill her room with pennies or something. Pennies that have been partially digested by a large, stinky land-mammal.
posted by loquacious at 8:29 AM on August 23, 2004

Loquacious, you've thought about this way too much.
posted by Ethereal Bligh at 8:34 AM on August 23, 2004

EB? Is that your shortest post ever, or what?

I do occasionally live up to my namesake. I'm barely hitting my stride, homeslice.

Maybe I have thought about it a bit. I like creative solutions to problems, I've lived most of my adult life in one semi-ghetto or another, and have seen an amazingly diverse array of social irritants do their thing. There are many legal and quasi-legal direct action steps people can take to empower and protect themselves without being violent or pestering the (usually useless) constabulary.
posted by loquacious at 9:14 AM on August 23, 2004

No.
posted by Ethereal Bligh at 11:06 AM on August 23, 2004

[meta]

Can I just say that this

you've thought about this way too much.
posted by Ethereal Bligh

absolutely cracked me up?

[/meta]
posted by Vidiot at 11:45 AM on August 23, 2004

It's really scary coming from me, huh? No, what I meant was that loquacious has perhaps spent a tiny bit more time formulating intricate and obscure revenge fantasies than is perhaps healthy.

Not really, though. I'm just funnin'. Revenge fantasies are a-okay with me. Not as much fun as actual revenge, but you gotta make your own entertainment, am I right?
posted by Ethereal Bligh at 11:57 AM on August 23, 2004

I've also made the camera quite visible in the window as an extra deterrant to any potential thieves.

Sure hope you are uploading these images to a web server or something. Otherwise what happens when the thief breaks the window and steals the camera?
posted by terrapin at 12:10 PM on August 23, 2004

i just thought the entire thread was stupid and boring. it's pepsi blue for memocam.
posted by quonsar at 12:10 PM on August 23, 2004

I kid because I like.
posted by Vidiot at 12:13 PM on August 23, 2004

"Otherwise what happens when the thief breaks the window and steals the camera?"

As he yanks the cord from the computer, it sucks the incriminating evidence with it, thus erasing the proof of his insidious crime?
posted by Ethereal Bligh at 12:20 PM on August 23, 2004

what happens when the thief breaks the window and steals the camera?
So the webcam was offline last night. Because someone broke in and stole it. It was this guy.
(Scroll down to 19 Jan)
posted by George_Spiggott at 1:13 PM on August 23, 2004

EB: Remember, I go through 10^64th clock cycles for each one of yours, which is to say I didn't spend that much time on it at all. Besides, this kind of nutty problem solving comes naturally. My whole family has a very bizarre and active sense of humor. My brother and I used to spend days and weeks constructing improbably pointless Rube Goldberg contraptions.

I mean, I write stuff like this when I'm sleep deprived in the wee hours of dawn in one go without editing. (And yeah, I know the title is from Monty Python. The title alone set the gears rolling... right outta my head and down the street never to be seen again.)
posted by loquacious at 1:43 PM on August 23, 2004

First, it was $15 not $50. Second, I think I would act like kind of a dick to the person that burglarized me.
posted by bob sarabia at 3:02 PM on August 23, 2004

First, it was $15 not $50...

Victim says $50; perp says $15.
posted by dash_slot- at 4:30 PM on August 23, 2004

Lucky for me, I'm massively parallel so my single clock cycle has your 10^64 beat. Not to mention that you've failed to define how fast your clock is, so, really, you could be taking like, forever to think about it.

you do know how absurdly large 10^64 is, right?
posted by Ethereal Bligh at 1:42 AM on August 24, 2004