And I walked right out the Door...

October 3, 2004 5:48 PM

Nominee for the #3 position at the CIA is an "expert" in 5 finger discounts
posted by drezdn (17 comments total)

Maybe he's being brought on board to help crack down on, South American Theft Groups.
posted by drezdn at 6:00 PM on October 3, 2004

Goss picked Kostiw, a former lobbyist for ChevronTexaco Corp ...

The man to trust.
posted by hoskala at 6:14 PM on October 3, 2004

Awaiting comments about a band of crooks in 5...4....3....2....
posted by rough ashlar at 6:20 PM on October 3, 2004

*furtively conceals lamp in pants*
posted by quonsar at 6:31 PM on October 3, 2004

I think the real issue isn't that he shoplifted. It's that he got caught. Clearly not fit to run with current crowd who never get caught in lies and wrongdoing...oh wait ...
posted by srboisvert at 6:31 PM on October 3, 2004

Oh Pleeeeeeeeeeeeaze. Give it a rest.

This reminds me of the Alice's Restaurant Massacre, with full orchestration and five part harmony and stuff like that, like twenty seven eight-by-ten color glossy pictures with circles and arrows and a paragraph on the back of each one. Does this really mean that he is not moral enough to join the CIA, burn women, kids, houses and villages after being a shoplifter?
posted by caddis at 6:56 PM on October 3, 2004

The XDirector job has the comptroller's function for the Agency. It is passing strange that a man canned from the CIA for stealing from the company store would now come back as the supervisor of the Agency's wallet.
posted by rdone at 7:00 PM on October 3, 2004

caddis: no matter how badly someone may want to complete a crossword puzzle,
stealing a paper is akin to father rape.

Now kindly tell that Kostiw kid he is not fully rehabilitated, and that he needs to get back
to that Group W bench and sit down.
posted by Smart Dalek at 7:58 PM on October 3, 2004

I don't think he stole a paper. I think the headline is intended to mean that a US Paper reported that Kostiw had been caught shoplifting, which lead to his resignation from the CIA.
posted by drezdn at 8:49 PM on October 3, 2004

I have it on good authority that he was copying music files.

Onto paper tape.
posted by mr_crash_davis at 9:17 PM on October 3, 2004

One does have to wonder about the judgement of someone who would go shoplifting in the CIA building. That being said, what's up with this Administration and big oil lobbyists? It's at the point where they should put up a big sign on the White House lawn advertising a big jobs clearinghouse for people in that particular line of work.
posted by clevershark at 10:58 PM on October 3, 2004

I think Kostiw is eminently qualified to look after US oil interests in Iraq. He can work with Jim Woolsey to ensure that - amidst the rising mayhem and spreading insurgency - that Iraqi oil exports keep flowing.

But as for Kostiw's misdemeanor shoplifting arrest - I'm sure his heart was in the right place. He must have been practicing his stealthiness.

I bet he never gets caught shoplifting aymore and - besides - he's wised up and moved on to government sanctioned theft, as practiced currently in the oil biz. He can now study with the best :

"Five finger Cheney" is the master.
posted by troutfishing at 3:33 AM on October 4, 2004

You would expect differently from a Bushwhacker? Sounds like a perfect fit with the current cabal.
posted by nofundy at 5:30 AM on October 4, 2004

First Mankiw , now Kostiw...what ethnic group has names that abruptly end with 'iw'?
posted by goethean at 9:28 AM on October 4, 2004

goethean???


I hope he doesn't get clearance, but won't be surprised if he does. Meanwhile, why is Porter Goss getting to appoint people anyway? We have an election in a month.
posted by amberglow at 10:01 AM on October 4, 2004

Update: Goss Choice Will Not Take Head CIA Post
Kostiw Withdraws Name From Consideration as Executive Director, Citing Heartless Ridicule of MetaFilter Members
posted by soyjoy at 1:34 PM on October 4, 2004

Tuh. It's "walk right THROUGH the door."
posted by juniper at 1:44 PM on October 4, 2004