Greatest Americans

June 3, 2005 6:53 PM

The 100 Greatest Americans ? This Sunday night at 8:00, the Discovery Channel will begin a seven hour series that starts with the top 100 Americans nominated by an on-line poll and culminates in real-time election- style voting, as America selects one person to be named the "Greatest American." Dr. Phil vs. Oprah, Barbara Bush vs. Laura Bush, and Jacko vs. Madonna. Can you feel the excitement?
posted by Secret Life of Gravy (44 comments total)

That guy's commentary on the complete list kind of surprised me: very old-school... Malcom X "doesn't remotely belong" on the list and Martin Luther King Jr. sorta does? Maybe I'm kinda twentieth-century-centric, but wow.
posted by ITheCosmos at 7:01 PM on June 3, 2005

Brent Farve, Barrack Obama, Mel Gibson, Tom Cruise?!? My God, it's worse than I ever could have thought!
posted by SSShupe at 7:03 PM on June 3, 2005

Before we all start complaining about the list, do keep in mind that that is, in fact, precisely what it was designed for. This isn't an official tally. It's a conversation and controversy maker. It's supposed to make you upset.

That said, I'm not familiar with the Professor Bainbridge of the second link, but it says a lot about a man when he thinks that Martin Luther King, Harry S. Truman, Hariett Tubman, Neil Armstrong and Nikola Tesla are all horrible, offensive choices for even a top 100 list, but that Knute Rockne is a mind-boggling exclusion.
posted by Simon! at 7:06 PM on June 3, 2005

"Greatest" omission: "America I'm putting my queer shoulder to the wheel"

posted by Julie at 7:07 PM on June 3, 2005

Reagan's on there because he was an actor, right?
posted by dreamsign at 7:08 PM on June 3, 2005

Everything seems to be in order here...

Susan B. Anthony
Theodore Roosevelt
Thomas Edison
Thomas Jefferson
Tiger Woods

Really, though, this is a silly, silly idea. It should be the top 100 dead americans.
posted by BlackLeotardFront at 7:12 PM on June 3, 2005

Those are the greatest?
posted by xistboi at 7:12 PM on June 3, 2005

Tommy Douglas was voted #1 on The Greatest Canadian List and Sir Winston Churchill was # 1 on The Greatest Britons List.

Now, I realize this is a popularity contst, but RUSH LIMBAUGH!!!!!!!!! ARRRRRGGGGGGGG!!!!!!
posted by Secret Life of Gravy at 7:17 PM on June 3, 2005

The absence of JW Gibbs shows immediately how totally f'd up and pedestrian this list is.
posted by shoos at 7:23 PM on June 3, 2005

Pim Fortuyn was voted #1 on the Greatest Dutch List.

So YMMV.
posted by kika at 7:25 PM on June 3, 2005

How come I'm not... oh wait. There I am.
posted by Baby_Balrog at 7:26 PM on June 3, 2005

Barbara BUSH???? I mean, seriously, what the 'eff' has she done to be considered great, other than squatting out a halfwit who miraculously got elected president, twice??
posted by newfers at 7:51 PM on June 3, 2005

Barbara BUSH???? I mean, seriously, what the 'eff' has she done to be considered great, other than squatting out a halfwit who miraculously got elected president?
posted by newfers at 7:51 PM on June 3, 2005

Tiger Woods but no Louis Armstrong, Thelonious Monk, Leonard Bernstein or Yogi Berra? Are we talking about the same America?
posted by QuietDesperation at 7:55 PM on June 3, 2005

Who the hell is this Professor Bainbridge? His commentary is ridiculous! While I agree with some of the omissions he pointed out, and there are certainly way to many 20th century celebrities of no consequence, he highlighted (Excuse me while I put my feminist hat on for a second) not one woman on his list, and had Julia Child listed as the only woman on his list of omissions. Okay, so a female chef is fine and dandy, but no other women are worthy of being "Great Americans" In his book? Jesus Christ!

Also, there seems to be a strong anti-minority bias in the Professor's recommendations as well. I can't take his list any more seriously than the incredibly flawed main list put forth by the discovery channel.
posted by piratebowling at 8:08 PM on June 3, 2005

This would be much more interesting if it was a head to head single elimination tournament among the listed 100. I'd buy a ticket for Tesla vs Monroe.

Any idea who the 18th century equivalent to Hugh Hefner would be?
posted by skyscraper at 8:25 PM on June 3, 2005

No Louis Armstrong?? WT@#$%%^&*! is wrong with these folk?
posted by hortense at 8:29 PM on June 3, 2005

George H. W. Bush
Barbara Bush
George W. Bush


Laura Bush

So that means of all the Greatest Americans that ever lived ....
4%
are made up of Bush Family members.

Keepin' it real, dog!!
posted by celerystick at 8:29 PM on June 3, 2005

Actually, only 3.96%. The Wright Bros, you see.
posted by skyscraper at 8:36 PM on June 3, 2005

So, 11% of "Greatest Americans" are republo-fundamentalists types.

• Arnold Schwarzenegger
• Barbara Bush
• Colin Powell
• Condoleezza Rice
• George H. W. Bush
• George W. Bush
• Laura Bush
• Mel Gibson
• Richard Nixon
• Ronald Reagan
• Rush Limbaugh

Strange, though, that they would overlook the greatest American of all time:Jesus
posted by Davenhill at 8:43 PM on June 3, 2005

I don't quite understand why he thinks Neil Armstrong does not belong, but John Glenn and Charles Lindbergh do. The man was the first human being to step in the fucking moon, for crying out loud. In my book he belongs even in "Greatest Humans" lists...
posted by nkyad at 8:47 PM on June 3, 2005

Well, although Arnold, Powell, and Nixon are Republicans, I don't think they're fundamentalists, even in the political context.
posted by Lord Chancellor at 8:50 PM on June 3, 2005

So, 11% of "Greatest Americans" are republo-fundamentalists types.

well it should be 50% but due to the liberal bias in the media thats what they got
posted by nervousfritz at 8:55 PM on June 3, 2005

No Walt Whitman? No William S. Burroughs? No Edward Kennedy Ellington (the Duke)? No John W. Coltrane?

Screw you guys, Ah'm goin' home.
posted by beelzbubba at 9:34 PM on June 3, 2005

Thurgood Marshall was a glaring omission. I mean, his was one of the few names I (as a non-American) recognised from Bainbrigde's additional list. His, and Julia Child, of course, who I think is terrific but not exactly in the same league as Thurgood Marshall.

Bainbridge is right about too many in the list being simply actors or celebrities, though Maya Angelo may have more staying power than he thinks she does.
posted by jb at 10:31 PM on June 3, 2005

Who the hell is "Brent Farve"?
posted by spock at 10:44 PM on June 3, 2005

Dr Phil's there, but Seth MacFarlane is not. It's a topsy-turvy world.
posted by Wataki at 10:56 PM on June 3, 2005

Where's Norman Borlaug?
posted by unsupervised at 11:03 PM on June 3, 2005

No one has yet pointed out that some of the people on this list of "Greatest Americans" are not even, erm, American. Albert Einstein? Who's great and who's not-- fine, that's a matter of taste-- but you'd think they'd be competent enough to not allow in people (no matter how great) who categorically cannot be a Great Americans.
posted by mowglisambo at 11:24 PM on June 3, 2005

OK, Albert Einstien is not an American, no matter how much we would like it.

I'm votong for Baby_Balrog.
posted by Balisong at 2:13 AM on June 4, 2005

Einstein was naturalized in 1940, so that doesn't bother me. I don't get why John Edwards is on the list, but John Kerry isn't.

I would have to agree on Neil Armstrong too...in 1000 years, assuming people are still around, I bet that the only two humans from the 20th Century that most people will know the names of are Yuri Gagarin and Neil Armstrong.
posted by stupidcomputernickname at 4:20 AM on June 4, 2005

in 1000 years, assuming people are still around, I bet that the only two humans from the 20th Century that most people will know the names of are Yuri Gagarin and Neil Armstrong.

Gagarin and Armstrong might be on a larger list -- lucky them -- but I don't see how it would ever be the case that all the rest (Lenin, Einstein, Hitler, Gandhi, Churchill, Stalin, Roosevelt, Mao, Henry Ford, T.S. Eliot, Pablo Picasso, etc.) would be forgotten and a couple of rocket drivers would be remembered.

Of course, propaganda can make a difference. If millions of people are told over and over again about Columbus discovering America, it doesn't matter whether it was true, people will remember the name. Maybe kids will memorize a silly rhyme like

In nineteen hundred sixty-nine,
Neil Armstrong landed on the mine
we used to call the moon before
we found that it was made of ore.

posted by pracowity at 5:06 AM on June 4, 2005

So, do the finalists have to sleep with Paula Abdul?
posted by briank at 6:07 AM on June 4, 2005

Tom Hanks and Tom Cruise, but no William Katt? Of any actor, he surely can lay claim to being the Greatest American....
posted by googly at 9:02 AM on June 4, 2005

culminates in real-time election- style voting

So we can expect to see months of recounts followed by a decision by The Supreme Court: It's Brett Favre! Suck On That, America!
posted by Fuzzy Monster at 9:02 AM on June 4, 2005

Brett Favre? Walter Payton should be there before him.
posted by SisterHavana at 10:20 AM on June 4, 2005

Tom Cruise belongs on the list simply because he's a horrendously wooding and distinctly untalented actor, yet he has much so much money and won so many accolades for acting. It's not that he's great, he really just symbolizes so much of our culture.
posted by psmealey at 11:44 AM on June 4, 2005

> No one has yet pointed out that some of the people on this list of "Greatest Americans" are not even, erm, American.

As I started reading the list, my first take was that it was satire... 3 of the first 7 fall into the category of "Great People From Other Countries Who Came to America".

Albert Einstein
A.G. Bell
Arnold Schwartzenegger

Scratch the great for Arnold though.
posted by stp123 at 12:56 PM on June 4, 2005

Darwin is on the British list (rightly so), but Stephen Jay Gould isn't on the American list.

And if the American list is going to contain Hollywood celebrities, Matt Groening should be on there, too.
posted by fossil_human at 1:58 PM on June 4, 2005

Whoa, whoa, whoa...Nikola Tesla doesn't even remotely belong?! He was the first one I looked for.
I can only hope this guy has no idea who he is. The AC power distributions system and AC motors?! Radio?! *sigh* At least he didn't bold that hack Edison on top of it...
posted by nTeleKy at 6:57 PM on June 4, 2005

Isn't Mel Gibson Austraaalian?
posted by feelinglistless at 4:43 AM on June 5, 2005

So it's pretty much Lincoln vs. Franklin, huh?
posted by Smedleyman at 12:54 AM on June 8, 2005

it's not righ...belushi should be on that list
posted by ronenosity at 12:43 AM on June 13, 2005

it's not right...belushi should be on that list
posted by ronenosity at 12:43 AM on June 13, 2005