chocolate milk is better then spinach

November 20, 2005 6:45 PM

I want some m#%$fu#%in chocolate milk! [google video - course language] If he played with his mother, he'd never talk to her like that. Maybe the kid is addicted, maybe he's just a spoil sport.
posted by bigmusic (101 comments total)

*coarse (?)
posted by thirteenkiller at 6:50 PM on November 20, 2005

I need a T-shirt with that on it.
posted by Edible Energy at 6:51 PM on November 20, 2005

I'm sending that video to my mom. She deserves to know what a good kid I was.
posted by amro at 6:59 PM on November 20, 2005

Google video doesn't support playback in my country.
posted by Joseph Gurl at 7:01 PM on November 20, 2005

"It's best to have the spinach before the chocolate milk."

"I disagree. Chocolate milk is a refreshing opener; spinach is a digestif that goes much better after the chocolate milk, which has already settled the palate."

"So, you're saying that it's chocolate milk first, before the spinach?"

"Yes, chocolate milk is better, then spinach."

"Just so, old boy."
posted by interrobang at 7:02 PM on November 20, 2005

She should just get the kid some motherfucking chocolate milk like he asked. She said he could have anything he wanted and that's what he wants.

Bullshit, man.
posted by ColdChef at 7:05 PM on November 20, 2005

Bah google videos.. anyone have a direct link so I can download it? And that downloadgooglevideo.com don't work either, maybe it is because mplayer don't do FLV.

Lund
posted by lundman at 7:06 PM on November 20, 2005

I love how he throws in 'Mom, please get it', then follows it with 'BULLSHIT! YOU SAID YOU'D GET IT'.

This kid sounds like Cartman.
posted by anthill at 7:06 PM on November 20, 2005

This is what video games look like now? You can talk to people while playing? Who the hell would want to do that? Watching this makes me fondly remember the days of Super Mario Brothers. Those goombas never inspired such vulgarity.

Oh and coldchef, you forgot, she's a liar.
posted by loquax at 7:07 PM on November 20, 2005

You're right, man! She IS a liar. He doesn't want the Mountain Dew. Why can't she understand that?

Bullshit.
posted by ColdChef at 7:09 PM on November 20, 2005

I mean, c'mon. It was a clan match. It was a CLAN MATCH.
posted by cortex at 7:13 PM on November 20, 2005

Oh. It took most of the clip before I realized that the boy's voice activates the lip movement of the dude on the screen. Sort of surreal.

And why won't the dumb bitch just get some chocolate milk? Why will she only serve Mountain Dew? She wouldn't be so cocky if that were a REAL soldier asking for his motherfucking chocolate milk....
posted by Jesse H Christ at 7:14 PM on November 20, 2005

I dunno, chocolate milk is pretty good...
posted by Space Coyote at 7:21 PM on November 20, 2005

Does this now mean the chocolate milk lobby should be worried about Jack Thompson?
posted by id at 7:24 PM on November 20, 2005

That is

every

kid

you see online.

Lund
posted by shmegegge at 7:24 PM on November 20, 2005

All he wanted was a pepsi chocolate milk, just one pepsi chocolate milk, and she wouldn't give it to him, just one pepsi chocolate milk...
posted by hob at 7:25 PM on November 20, 2005

For some reason, this really reminds me of...

"I wanna cast magic missile!"
posted by Derive the Hamiltonian of... at 7:25 PM on November 20, 2005

Reminded me of this Penny Arcade Comic.
posted by anthill at 7:28 PM on November 20, 2005

As a parent, I can say this is probably one of the saddest and most pathetic things I've ever heard.

I feel sorry for the mom. And I wonder why/how he turned out that way.
posted by quietfish at 7:31 PM on November 20, 2005

Um, that kid really sucks. He had potential headshot like a million times. Unless that was his own teammate, in which case he still sucks for spraying the guy with random rifle fire.

Oh, and a tip for the mom: It's called the power cable. Yank it.

Also: It's called the back of your hand. Use it.
posted by Civil_Disobedient at 7:31 PM on November 20, 2005

He should have just asked her for a Pepsi
posted by Bighappyfunhouse at 7:34 PM on November 20, 2005

For fun, imagine this as an argument between the Prince and his father in Katamari.
posted by VulcanMike at 7:37 PM on November 20, 2005

Oh, whatever C_D. She told him she'd get him anything he wanted. He wanted chocolate milk. She won't get him chocolate milk.

Bullshit.
posted by graventy at 7:37 PM on November 20, 2005

Watching this makes me fondly remember the days of Super Mario Brothers. Those goombas never inspired such vulgarity.

Dude, you never played at my house. Motherfucking goombas got us so amped, Howard Stern would blush.
posted by fungible at 7:49 PM on November 20, 2005

If he doesn't make it on the video game circuit the kid has potential as a bond trader. I swear I used to hear this exact conversation going on in the boss's office every year around bonus time.
posted by Opposite George at 7:56 PM on November 20, 2005

Fandango_matt, reminds me of that recording of the soldier that called his mom from Iraq in the midst of an ambush/attack.

p.s. could someone explain the physics of that game as it didn't really make any sense to these old(er) eyes.
posted by shoepal at 7:57 PM on November 20, 2005

Obviously a young republican in training.

Stay the course, kid - stay the course.
posted by bashos_frog at 7:58 PM on November 20, 2005

You should see my GF playing Super Mario Sunshine. Such a happy, shiny game. So much swearing it'd make a dead sailor sit up and take detailed notes. Hell, I invented some of my best curses playing Super Mario 64.
posted by loquacious at 7:58 PM on November 20, 2005

Wow. The stastical median of Augustus Glut, Teevee Mike, and Veruca Salt.

If they had cast him the would have shaved 45 minutes off of that movie.
posted by sourwookie at 8:02 PM on November 20, 2005

Best.

Contraceptive video.

Ever.
posted by lalochezia at 8:06 PM on November 20, 2005

hmm i just wonder how i would be able to screech at my mother for chocolate milk, after my father rightly broke my little evil mouth with the back of his hand over and over , after i talked to his wife that way. i guess i'll never know.
posted by nola at 8:07 PM on November 20, 2005

*views video*

Of course, we never swear whinge and whine like that. I generally don't advocate child abuse, but that kid needs a paddlin'. And a time-out from the X-Box.

Hey, paddle him *with* the X-Box! That'll larn 'im. You could knock out an elephant with one of those things.

Poor mom sounds really haggard and beat.
posted by loquacious at 8:10 PM on November 20, 2005

"All I wanted was a Pepsi, and she wouldn't give it to me! Just one Pepsi, and she wouldn't give it to me!"
posted by zardoz at 8:14 PM on November 20, 2005

Oh, hob beat me to it.
posted by zardoz at 8:15 PM on November 20, 2005

What is so fucking awesome about this is when he yells,

"I wanted mountain dew, but now I want chocolate milk!"
posted by jmgorman at 8:17 PM on November 20, 2005

Oh, hob beat me to it.

It was my first intended post, but it was referenced twice before I got it out (hob, bighappyfunhouse).

So I had to come up with something new.
posted by sourwookie at 8:19 PM on November 20, 2005

I feel sorry for the mom. And I wonder why/how he turned out that way.

I hope that's sarcasm. Although there are exceptions, parents tend to reap what they sow. No discipline? You end up with a hooligan like that.

That said - the kid's a wanker. His vocabulary is rather limited.
posted by deborah at 8:24 PM on November 20, 2005

I feel sorry for the mom. And I wonder why/how he turned out that way.

I don't. She's likely the reason that he turned out that way.
posted by LittleMissCranky at 8:26 PM on November 20, 2005

Respect my authoritah!
posted by Joeforking at 8:32 PM on November 20, 2005

for those who didn't get it, the person's view we're seeing from in the game is NOT the kid. it is someone else on his team/clan who started capturing when after the conversation started, and then spent some time trying to find the kid's character. once found, the teammate just kept zooming into the kid's character's face so we could see his lips moving as he had his temper tantrum.

if you didn't realize that the first time, watch it again. it's so much better. soldiers with taciturn faces screaming i WANT SOME MOTHERFUCKING CHOCOLATE MILK!!!
posted by shmegegge at 8:34 PM on November 20, 2005

You guys stole all the good lines already.

Readers of Viz magazine will no doubt be reminded of this character. A character I thought, until today, could never possibly exist in real life.
posted by uncanny hengeman at 8:35 PM on November 20, 2005

Hey, at least he didn't get quite as worked up as this guy.
posted by Stauf at 8:37 PM on November 20, 2005

I couldn't even watch the whole thing. Now I want to go next door and beat the shit out of the fat fuck of a son my neighbours have, who is equally demanding and spoiled.
posted by solid-one-love at 8:41 PM on November 20, 2005

What the fuck kind of parent gives her 9 year old kid Mountain Dew? Jesus christ, that's preteen like crystal meth.
posted by tristeza at 8:44 PM on November 20, 2005

Is he really 9?

Crikey, they grow up fast.
posted by uncanny hengeman at 8:46 PM on November 20, 2005

The last half just gets funnier every time I view it.
posted by sourwookie at 8:51 PM on November 20, 2005

Bitch needed to cough up the chocolate milk is all.
posted by Justinian at 8:54 PM on November 20, 2005

If that was my kid he wouldn't get any mutherfuckin' chocolate milk till he turned 18, moved out and bought his own.
posted by fshgrl at 8:58 PM on November 20, 2005

You know, I was in the city today and I saw some cute kids and some really cute babies. And I thought to myself, y'know maybe I should I reconsider the whole "I'm not going to have any kids and spend the money I save on a Nintendo Revolution or something" thing. Maybe being a mom would be fun and fulfilling, I thought.

And then I saw this video.

...

Fuck kids. I'm having my tubes tied.
posted by kosher_jenny at 9:08 PM on November 20, 2005

I would yank the XBOX and sell it. The kid would be smacked a good one for being a little dick. I am not advocating physical abuse but that kid is way beyond a time out.
posted by bratcat at 9:09 PM on November 20, 2005

tree



acorn
posted by stirfry at 9:15 PM on November 20, 2005

"The kid would be smacked a good one for being a little dick."

What about the mom? Kids don't start screaming for their motherfuckin' chocolate milk overnight, you know. They have to get away with that sort of crap for a while. If you're gonna smack the kid around, save a couple of nice hard slaps for the parents.
posted by jscalzi at 9:16 PM on November 20, 2005

jscalzi, very true. I think the parents of kid lost it a long time ago.
posted by bratcat at 9:37 PM on November 20, 2005

Well, to be fair about it, she did say that she would get him something to drink and didn't follow through. All the child psychology books say that you shouldn't make promises that you aren't going to keep so perhaps she should either make fewer promises or just bring him the motherfucking chocolate milk.
posted by leftcoastbob at 9:38 PM on November 20, 2005

We are so overdue for a malevolent alien invasion.
posted by interrobang at 9:45 PM on November 20, 2005

You can tell the mom is a pussy coz there was her 'count down to an ultimatum' thang going on there… and when she reached zero nothing happened and the argument continued.
posted by uncanny hengeman at 9:47 PM on November 20, 2005

...so this game doesn't have a pause button? Is he that in the zone that he can't just go grab--

Never mind. I have attention deficit disorder anyway.
posted by deusdiabolus at 9:52 PM on November 20, 2005

Well, to be fair about it, she did say that she would get him something to drink and didn't follow through.

Not really the case, as far as I can tell from watching the video. He asked for Mountain Dew. He got Mountain Dew.

This looks like a dysfunctional example of the kind of struggle that takes place in many families, where children attempt to assert their needs and wants as being more important than anyone else's. This process is actually quite normal, and in a functional family, children are taught / socialized over time to understand that there are boundaries and consequences. That can take a huge amount of strength and self-discipline on the part of the parent(s), particularly when faced with the kind of unalleviated tantrum a 9-year-old can muster as punishment for non-compliance. And that's exactly what this kid is doing. He's trying to demonstrate to his mother that he's in control (and doing a damn good job of it). Ask for one thing, change your mind when that thing is delivered, punish the parent for being unwilling to comply with constantly revised demands.

I agree with others -- yanking the power on the Xbox, and maybe even giving it to a friend or relative to look after for a period of time would be a good place to start. But, bet your bottom dollar, that would only be the beginning of a nightmare parenting experience for this woman.
posted by planetthoughtful at 10:31 PM on November 20, 2005

and in a functional family, children are taught / socialized over time to understand that there are boundaries and consequences

And in families where they do not learn these valuable social lessons, only the White House awaits.
posted by Civil_Disobedient at 10:40 PM on November 20, 2005

If I was that kid, once I got the chocolate milk, I would dump it all over the the mother's head, just to drive my point home.
posted by Falconetti at 10:57 PM on November 20, 2005

The second my kid pulls this shit, he's getting the Xbox shoved up his ass. Lubricated by chocolate milk and montain dew.
posted by c13 at 11:04 PM on November 20, 2005

This is actually just one of about four videos recording this kid arguing with his mom.

I didn't find them funny, though, just depressing. I have a parenting role to three kids with emotional development issues and this is so similar to their daily attention outbursts. You can't argue with them, like this mom did -- you can't engage them in debate. That just brings you onto their playing field. You have to tell them, flat out, "This is not an argument" and make it stick.

The kids need to have their meds, though, and this gives them an angle. When they have pills to take, they know they can play any kind of game they want. Then you have to resort to techniques like mirroring and perpendicular arguments.

Wish I could give that mom some pointers. She's gonna have him running her life for a long time yet.
posted by dhartung at 11:51 PM on November 20, 2005

And in families where they do not learn these valuable social lessons, only the White House awaits.

I pondered this sentence for some time, and I'm still not sure what you mean. I experimented with "only a life in politics and possibly the Presidency awaits", but that doesn't seem to fit the context.

And there's something to be said for contemplating the phrase, "We are not all Americans." I live in this entirely fictional country called "Australia", which is allegedly not part of the US. Yet. Any 9-year-old Australian for whom the White House awaits probably implies some form of distinguished career in diplomacy, or perhaps even tourism.
posted by planetthoughtful at 12:12 AM on November 21, 2005

As obnoxious as this boy was, let me be the first to give him the benefit of the doubt. You see, when it comes to online play and particularly the clan match, there are complex social rules at work. This is unlikely evidence of addiction.

Even in regular online play, the gamer is likely playing with and against up to 8, 16 or 32 others. The departure mid-game of a player is frowned upon, as it upsets the balance and gives one side the advantage. You're not just turning the machine off, but potentially messing up the game for a number of others.

With a clan match, it's your organised team against another. The result really counts for something. Reputations are at stake. Whatever social rules are at work before you can factor tenfold. Turning off your XBox really is not an option: you shouldn't have started what you couldn't finish. You're letting the side down, and gifting the other clan, who have been pompusly mouthing off about their superiority, the victory.

With a clan match, it's not his own fear of missing the end of the game that prevents him from turning the machine off; it's the duty to his clan that sees him desperately try every trick in the book to keep that machine on. Did he handle it well? Hell no. But show me a teenager in the world that can't lash out when backed into a corner about something they *really* care about.

If you have doubts that a videogame is worth caring about, I should add that along with the social rules that come with online play, it often is a rewarding social experience. Friendships, crushes, platonic relationships all occur. What might appear to be a mindless shooting game to the uninitiated can have complex strategies, counter-strategies, social hierarchies and complex, sensitive human problems. In short, there is educational value here above and beyond any amount of targeted "edutainment" software.

Yeah, I'm going to give the kid the benefit of the doubt.

Metafilter just don't understand.
posted by nthdegx at 12:31 AM on November 21, 2005

I live in this entirely fictional country called "Australia", which is allegedly not part of the US.

Allegedly. So far your only visible protests against being occupied / co-opted has been in insisting that Marmite/Vegemite are edible and that Foster's is drinkable.

Remember Crocodile Dundee? You should have nuked us for that. We would have done the same to you.

Though you did recently lob this one over the ocean. Well done. I haven't been able to sleep well ever since.
posted by loquacious at 12:39 AM on November 21, 2005

nthdegx,
Are you being sarcastic? Because if you aren't, your comment is beyond idiotic. What is wrong with you? Benefit of the doubt? Metafilter just don't understand? News Flash: I, and probably many people here, have played a number of online FPSs. I understand the team element, and the importance of not abandoning your team, but nothing gives a 9 year old the right to act like this, especially towards his mother. It's a sign of a serious deficiency in the parenting, or the environment, or something, because no child should be acting like this. You seem to be saying that the interaction of an online game excuses this kid's acting like a complete ass. If you can't see the problem with that, there is something wrong with you. Benefit of the doubt? Ridiculous.
posted by Sangermaine at 12:50 AM on November 21, 2005

nthdegx: Erm. No. Nice try, though. That kid needs a boot enema. Critically.

Family > Game+Clan+Onlinewhatever+Deathbox.

Family > Ego boosted by silly ladder rankings.

Speaking as a once-dedicated ex-FPS gamer. It's a fucking game. He steps out. He behaves like a rational human being. His squad (maybe) loses a round. His squad (maybe) loses a ladder ranking. The opposing squad will see the individual drop out and realize deep down that it was a hollow victory, regardless of whatever trash talking happens.

His squad maybe rips him one, but the whole fiasco just gives them something more to strive for.

Besides, he's fucking 9 years old or so. What valuable lessons is he learning? Killing people is lots of fun? Teamwork? Being there for the team and taking orders no matter what? No matter the perspective of his mom standing there cracking and breaking up like an experimental rocketplane on a lake bed with the sheer frustration of having erroneously bred such a hideous monster, and feeling the weight and burden of always wondering why and how she got there?

Yeah, he's learning, all right. Learning about the future, the future of a boot stamping on a human face forever.
posted by loquacious at 12:52 AM on November 21, 2005

Sangermaine, *everyone* agrees with you. Is there not room in this thread for one contrary opinion without you implying I have problems?
posted by nthdegx at 12:53 AM on November 21, 2005

And at no stage did I say it was okay for the kid to act like that. Read my post again, but unclench a little this time. I'm just looking beyond lazily attributing this behaviour to videogame addiction.
posted by nthdegx at 12:56 AM on November 21, 2005

Sorry. No, that's not necassarily video game addiction, you're correct there.

But if I unclench all the marbles will fall out.
posted by loquacious at 1:00 AM on November 21, 2005

I was talking more to Sangermaine, but you have to love a thread where someone trying to actually understand the kid gets accused of having problems whilst talk of violence goes unchecked. Only in America, I guess.
posted by nthdegx at 1:08 AM on November 21, 2005

So far your only visible protests against being occupied / co-opted has been in insisting that Marmite/Vegemite are edible and that Foster's is drinkable.

Fosters is a joke Australia is playing on the rest of the world. We won't drink the stuff, and we're amazed you haven't caught on. Maybe it was too subtle, for a country not known for its subtlety.
posted by planetthoughtful at 1:16 AM on November 21, 2005

nthdegx: I agree with you. I'm mainly talking about proverbial-metaphorical violence, or the laying down of the smack. Unplugging the X Box would be a good start.

But I do know if I ever talked to my natural Dad like that - the one who never, ever laid a mean hand on my brother and I - he'd either put his foot so far up my ass we could trim his toenails with our teeth or he'd break down crying and wonder where he fucked up.

If I ever even thought of talking to my step dad like that he'd have backhanded me right into the bronze age.

Anyways, the kid is obviously old enough to shoot up virtual people all day long and swear like a soldier with a gut wound. I'm pretty sure he can handle a right proper spanking.
posted by loquacious at 1:21 AM on November 21, 2005

Metafilter just don't understand.

Whats to understand?

The game is important to him. The chocolate milk is important to him. He's been brought up to believe that if he whines long and hard enough, he'll get what he wants.

It's time to put in a call to Rick Strawn.
posted by PeterMcDermott at 1:37 AM on November 21, 2005

Why is a nine year old kid playing an R rated, gory, first-person shooter? I guess his mom thinks it's suitible. In which case... give him his motherfucking chocolate milk you lying bitch!
posted by DrDoberman at 2:29 AM on November 21, 2005

there's something to be said for contemplating the phrase, "We are not all Americans."

You will be... you will be.
posted by Civil_Disobedient at 4:16 AM on November 21, 2005

Uh, yeah. Left unstated in nthdegx's plea for clan understanding is the the question: What the hell is a nine-year-old doing playing an online game that's rated "T" or "M" in the first place? And we're back to the task of slapping around the parent for being a moron.
posted by jscalzi at 4:28 AM on November 21, 2005

"What the hell is a nine-year-old doing playing an online game that's rated "T" or "M" in the first place?"

That's a perfectly reasonable question but not necessarily relevant to the point I was making.
posted by nthdegx at 4:45 AM on November 21, 2005

jscalzi writes " 'The kid would be smacked a good one for being a little dick.'"

You Need to Start Beating Your Kids
posted by Deathalicious at 4:55 AM on November 21, 2005

Fogey time.

I've never played any of these games and this was my first experience watching what it must be like. Yikes. This is what 9-year-olds are growing up with these days? I am deeply scared now.
And what lalochezia said re contraception.
And thanks to shmegegge for 'splaining what the fuck was going on with the lip movements.

/fogey time
posted by CunningLinguist at 5:05 AM on November 21, 2005

"jscalzi writes 'The kid would be smacked a good one for being a little dick.'"

I didn't write that. Bratcat did. I was the one opting for smacking around the mom.

Although to be clear, if my kid popped off like that, there would be trouble. However, we're pretty vigiliant regarding parental disrespect. I can't imagine letting our kid get to that point.

nthdegx: If we posit that a nine-year-old shouldn't be wasting other online avatars in a T or M rated game to begin with, it becomes precisely relevant, since we're seeing a pattern of neglectful parenting playing out. The kid ought not be in a clan at all and etc.; if he's got a video game addiction, the cause of it traces back to good ol' mom, and her actions (or lack thereof).
posted by jscalzi at 5:14 AM on November 21, 2005

but you have to love a thread where someone trying to actually understand the kid gets accused of having problems whilst talk of violence goes unchecked. Only in America, I guess.

No, it happens elsewhere, as well. For example, in Austral... Ah, dammit, I've made this point already, haven't I?
posted by planetthoughtful at 5:31 AM on November 21, 2005

I used to not have a computer at home, so in order to check my email, I'd step over to this "internet cafe" down the block. Only it wasn't a cafe. It was a basement lined with black light posters and thirty or so PCs.

If you went there during the day, you'd find a dozen or so kids skipping school and playing network Half-Life or some such business. They all screamed at each other across the room, a constant stream of explosions and gunfire and swear words in english and spanish. No adults in the room at all, except me.

One day, just to see what would happen, I fired up the Kazaa on one of the terminals and found a treasure trove of hardcore child pornography.

They finally shut it down a few months ago. If they weren't selling drugs there, they should've been. What a dump.
posted by fungible at 6:19 AM on November 21, 2005

Obviously a young republican in training.
Stay the course, kid - stay the course.

I really expected this sort of comment much earlier in the thread. 29th? Metafilter is slipping.
posted by DWRoelands at 6:22 AM on November 21, 2005

Yeah, I don't think you mean treasure trove, do you, fungible?
posted by nthdegx at 7:02 AM on November 21, 2005

There are FOUR of these videos, and no one has thought that possibly this is fake? Much like the fabled "Leeerrrooy Jennnkikns" of World of Warcraft fame?

I'm calling hoax. I think this was staged. If this was one video, I might believe it, but four? My skeptical-sense is tingling.
posted by FritoKAL at 7:28 AM on November 21, 2005

nthdegx: Thank you for your insight into the gaming world.

Did he handle it well? Hell no. But show me a teenager in the world that can't lash out when backed into a corner about something they *really* care about.

This is a good point. The mom should find out a) if the game is appropriate for a nine-year-old; and b) if she thinks that it is, rules should be set. Make him responsible for the consequences. "You may play the game until x o'clock. If you are not finished by that time, don't start playing or you will be responsible for letting down your team." Maybe put limits on the times that he can play and if he goes around the rules, then take his game away for an agreed-upon time. Make the kid responsible for following the rules.

That is, of course, if she truly believes that this game is age-appropriate for the little tyke.
posted by leftcoastbob at 7:59 AM on November 21, 2005

I think we should all relax and listen to some chocolate milk.
posted by anthill at 9:33 AM on November 21, 2005

showpal wrote: p.s. could someone explain the physics of that game as it didn't really make any sense to these old(er) eyes.

The game is called Rainbox Six: Black Arrow and he is playing on his Xbox over something called Xbox Live. Xbox Live allows players to hook their internet connection to the Xbox and play others online (as long as the game has online play). He is playing in a multiplayer match of the game; one team vs the other team.

The view that we see is not the kid talking, but a teammate (and the person who recorded the film), and he can't kill his teammate as they have apparently disallowed "team killing". It is still annoying to have someone shoot you (even though it doesn't hurt you here), and he keeps doing it to try and get the kid's attention.

Oddly enough, there are only 3 people online for this match, and they are all on the same team thus there aren't any enemies to kill at the moment (but they can connect at any time). They are "camping" a spot that is frequently used by the other team. When someone "camps" in a FPS (First Person Shooter - first person meaning the view at which you see the game), they are waiting in an advantageous spot for unaware enemies to run by. Even though it is a valid tactic, it is seen as dishonorable and generally a sign of a lacking of gameplay skills. A "griefer" will camp as often as possible, and the younger the player, the more they want to win at any cost.

When the view turns green he's using night vision and when it turns circular it means the guy has pressed a button to look through the gun's scope. He is trying to get a perfect shot through the grating to hit anyone on the floor beneath when they appear.

In the more modern FPS online multiplayer games, the avatar's mouths move if someone is using "team-speak" (a form of online voice chat used in games).

Oddly enough, I don't own an Xbox and have never played the game.
posted by cleverusername at 10:00 AM on November 21, 2005

No, it happens elsewhere, as well. For example, in Austral... Ah, dammit, I've made this point already, haven't I?
posted by planetthoughtful

PlaneThoughtful wins.
posted by Outlawyr at 11:33 AM on November 21, 2005

"Oddly enough, there are only 3 people online for this match"

Well that rather diminishes the margin for doubt I referred to in my first response, disappointingly enough.
posted by nthdegx at 11:57 AM on November 21, 2005

Thanks cleverusername. I appreciate the explanation. I was indeed perplexed by the apparently ineffectual bullets being fired at the guy, but now it makes (some) sense.
posted by shoepal at 12:00 PM on November 21, 2005

Wow. I, uh, suddenly feel MUCH better about my ability to be an effective parent.

The trick is, how will I teach my kids to deal with kids like this?

What nonsense.
posted by davejay at 1:23 PM on November 21, 2005

It grieves me to think that this is yet another person being groomed for the adult world with such little regard for basic civilitude.

Quite aside from whatever was promised and not delivered, or whatever was being played, whether he was oversugared or undermedicated...there is simply NO excuse to speak to your mother that way. When you're 9, there is really no excuse for you to speak to ANYONE that way.

All other considerations fade to relative insignificance compared to the outrageous, egregious misbehavior that is, in my opinion, simply beyond the pale.

I wouldn't advocate the boot up the ass that I'd be so tempted to deliver. But I'd surely take away the Xbox. And there would be no choco OR 'dew for a long, long time...
posted by darkstar at 1:34 PM on November 21, 2005

I'm calling hoax. I think this was staged.

Controversial.
posted by uncanny hengeman at 5:27 PM on November 21, 2005

Yeah, I don't think you mean treasure trove, do you, fungible?

Why, no! I love child porn! OK, I was being ironic.
posted by fungible at 9:00 PM on November 21, 2005

I'm calling hoax. I think this was staged.

Cough. Would it be any less depressing if it was? Consider the alternatives - you either have a 9 year old boy with extreme behavioral problems, or you have someone who thinks it's "funnee" to have a 9 year old boy pretending to have extreme behavioral problems, complete with supporting cast in the role of "Verbally Abused Mother". Seriously, in what world would that be a better outcome?
posted by planetthoughtful at 9:44 PM on November 21, 2005

Hoax-wise, dhartung, or anybody, what's the story with the 4 videos? Are you saying there are 4 separate videos taken by different shooters?
posted by tula at 10:06 PM on November 21, 2005

All he wanted was a pepsi chocolate milk, just one pepsi chocolate milk, and she wouldn't give it to him, just one pepsi chocolate milk...
posted by hob at 9:25 PM CST on November 20 [!]

hob wins.

Also, if that were my son, I would, sincerely, beat him to within an inch of his life and dare him to ever say anything to me with that tone again for the remainder of his days.

He also would not own an xbox anymore. Nor a computer, nor a television nor a telephone.

A perfect example of spoiling a child. To spoil means to ruin.
posted by Ynoxas at 9:53 PM on November 23, 2005

Fun fact, Leroy Jenkins is the kid's dad.
posted by drezdn at 10:14 AM on November 25, 2005

cleverusername writes "Oddly enough, I don't own an Xbox and have never played the game."

A great explanation, regardless.
posted by OmieWise at 10:47 AM on November 25, 2005