Well, I'm Sorry, Timmy, but I don't dip that way.

February 2, 2008 8:51 AM

Hey George, Timmy was right! A new study [PDF] by the Department of Food Science & Nutrition at Clemson University confirms that double dipping is just plain gross. “The way I would put it is, before you have some dip at a party, look around and ask yourself, would I be willing to kiss everyone here? Because you don’t know who might be double dipping, and those who do are sharing their saliva with you,” food microbiologist Prof. Paul L. Dawson says.

Other Clemson “Food Myths” studies [all PDFs]: Five-Second Rule Article | Hand Washing Article.

posted by ericb (39 comments total)

“That's like putting your whole mouth in the dip!”
posted by ericb at 8:53 AM on February 2, 2008

Also, try not to touch anything anyone else does. Or breathe. Have fun!
posted by hackly_fracture at 8:53 AM on February 2, 2008 [6 favorites]

They will be making antibacterial chips and Purell-brand self-disinfecting salsa soon.

I work with a number of control-freak germaphobes, including a woman who tries to touch nothing that is not required by her job (printouts, yes--doorknobs, no). When I watch them fumble about, I wonder if they ever saw the last story in Creepshow. In the end, we all burst with the pollutants we try to hide from. George's double dipping should be the least of your problems.
posted by Admiral Haddock at 9:04 AM on February 2, 2008

Wow, hand sanitizers remove less bacteria than rinsing your hands without using soap.
posted by grouse at 9:06 AM on February 2, 2008

IANA doctor, but I feel like interacting with more organisms and letting your immune system recognize and be prepared for them might be more effective at keeping your health rather than avoiding all possible contacts with unknown microbes.
posted by localhuman at 9:15 AM on February 2, 2008

... before you have some dip at a party, look around and ask yourself, would I be willing to kiss everyone here?

Well, sure, that's kind of the point. Wait, what kind of parties do you go to?
posted by dgaicun at 9:16 AM on February 2, 2008 [4 favorites]

I currently have a terrible flu, and feel like shit; however, it's the first time I've been sick in well over a year, and I am by no means germophobic (I live by the five-second rule, for example). My girlfriend is terrified of germs, and she gets sick about once every three weeks.

QED, bitches!
posted by shakespeherian at 9:18 AM on February 2, 2008 [1 favorite]

That's why you're supposed to use a corner of the chip that hasn't been in contact with your mouth.
posted by furtive at 9:19 AM on February 2, 2008

Last year he published a paper on the five-second rule, which states that food dropped on the floor can be safely eaten if you pick it up before you can count to five. The rule turned out to be false.

I seem to recall that at least one study confirmed the x-second rule, the amount of germs depending on the time food remained on the floor.
posted by Brian B. at 9:25 AM on February 2, 2008

> IANA doctor, but I feel like interacting with more organisms and letting your immune system recognize and be prepared for them might be more effective at keeping your health rather than avoiding all possible contacts with unknown microbes.

A certain level of exposure to germs is good for you, even your baby.
posted by you just lost the game at 9:29 AM on February 2, 2008

I recall a study that confirmed the findings of the link above with regards to bacterial transmission occurring within five seconds, but also found that there generally weren't any bacteria living on the floor anyway.
posted by TheOnlyCoolTim at 9:29 AM on February 2, 2008

Double-dipping? Pffft.

When someone farts and you smell it, you're actually breathing in particles that were in their ass.
posted by mr_crash_davis at 9:37 AM on February 2, 2008 [1 favorite]

> Wait, what kind of parties do you go to?

Lucky me, I was invited to a Karo party last night. But it was actually kind of yucky, I think maybe we did something wrong.
posted by jfuller at 9:41 AM on February 2, 2008

When You Want... the Flavor of Bacon... in a DIP!
posted by porn in the woods at 9:45 AM on February 2, 2008

Food microbiologists are probably about as much fun at dinner as week-old shrimp. These are the kind of people who cook their beef to an internal temperature of 165 - and then feel good about it.
posted by Justinian at 9:49 AM on February 2, 2008

The supposed benefits of exposing people to pathogens are seriously overstated in the popular mind. If you want to expose yourself to some bacteria, have a fucking yogurt.
posted by grouse at 9:50 AM on February 2, 2008 [2 favorites]

Do people slobber all over the tortilla chips and the like when they dip, then? Or put the dipped bit in and snap the rest off, like I do?

I don't think the bit left in my hand has necessarily touched my lips half the time. Of course, I may have scratched my arse, moved the dip with my hand and coughed all over it, but hey, as long as the little bit of savoury didn't touch my lips, we're not going to die, right?



(note: Apologies for the poor humourous level of this post, but I was going to go for the 'kissing everyone at a party is normal, duh!' bit, Some bastard beat me to it.)
posted by Brockles at 9:53 AM on February 2, 2008

The Mythbusters tested the 5-second rule. As I recall, the time isn’t nearly as much a factor as is the moistness or stickiness of the food.
posted by ijoshua at 9:56 AM on February 2, 2008

If this is gonna be that kinda party I'm gonna stick my dick in the mashed potatoes.
posted by goatdog at 10:16 AM on February 2, 2008

It's a good thing I'll kiss anyone!
posted by arcticwoman at 10:19 AM on February 2, 2008

No one living remembers the Great Bean Dip Plague of 1890 that killed eleven partygoers at a church social in Winona, Minnesota, but to this day locals still won't bring anything buy Jello salad to the Saturday Night Pot Luck.
posted by briank at 10:36 AM on February 2, 2008

If you are so fussy about diseases and eating, why do you brush your teeth in the bathroom?
posted by Postroad at 10:41 AM on February 2, 2008

Study Says Many Studies Suck.
posted by furtive at 10:44 AM on February 2, 2008

If you are so fussy about diseases and eating, why do you brush your teeth in the bathroom?

Because that's where the toothbrush is.
posted by goatdog at 11:12 AM on February 2, 2008

Hmm. I can think of a few differences between kissing someone and picking up a few of their mouth bacteria through a dip. But maybe that's just me.

Paranoia...is taking over the world. We're all so goddamned afraid we might die we FORGET TO LIVE!!!

Ahem.
posted by miss tea at 11:19 AM on February 2, 2008

nice random Winona reference, briank! You ever been there? The bean dip memorial museum is grand..
posted by localhuman at 11:28 AM on February 2, 2008

When someone farts and you smell it, you're actually breathing in particles that were in their ass.
posted by mr_crash_davis at 9:37 AM on February 2

Even when you don't smell it. I'm pretty sure whenever you use a public bathroom, you're breathing in particles from the asses of hundreds of people.
posted by vacapinta at 11:58 AM on February 2, 2008

Throughout my first 30-some years of life, I ate many scoops of dip and hardly ever got sick. Then I had a child, and never had the chance to go out to parties or eat dip anymore, but got sick all the damn time.

If you want to be well, never ever procreate or have contact with small children. But eat all the goddamn dip you want.

(my wonderful child barfed on me last night...we've been sick this year from November through January with, I think, 2 viruses, a flu, and possibly some teething. Bring on the dip, I say!)
posted by emjaybee at 12:44 PM on February 2, 2008 [1 favorite]

I just spit in the dip. Solves the problem handily.
posted by disclaimer at 12:48 PM on February 2, 2008

You know, when you smell dog crap or rotting food or some other nastiness, actual particles from said nastiness are actually going inside your nose. Literally.

Would you enjoy shoving cat scat up your nostrils? Ever consider packing some burnt hair upside your head?

I didn't think so.

So never smell anything. Ever. It's a dangerous world out there.
posted by Rhaomi at 1:04 PM on February 2, 2008

SMELLING IS BAD, MKAY?
posted by Brockles at 1:30 PM on February 2, 2008

Rhaomi - You know how secondhand smoke is bad mmmkay? I've met someone who thought this applied to how smokers smell after they've smoked. That was disorienting.
posted by Pronoiac at 1:35 PM on February 2, 2008

So, what you're trying to say is it's not common behavior to kiss everyone at the party? Huh. Oddly enough, I keep getting invited back!

I know a few people who won't eat snack food from bowls, due to fears of contamination - but at least one of them kissed me...and I kissed everyone at the party...so....
posted by The Light Fantastic at 2:27 PM on February 2, 2008

I know a few people who won't eat snack food from bowls, due to fears of contamination...

And others who avoid the after-dinner "pee mints" on the way out of the restaurant.
posted by ericb at 2:31 PM on February 2, 2008

do I have to imagine kissing all the boys, or can I just assume that they've previously all been kissed by at least one of the girls?
posted by russm at 8:08 PM on February 2, 2008

arcticwoman writes "It's a good thing I'll kiss anyone!"

Someone make sure to invite articwoman to the Calgary meetup.
posted by Mitheral at 9:42 PM on February 2, 2008

I know a few people who won't eat snack food from bowls, due to fears of contamination...

I am certainly one of those, but it's not fear - just common sense. Have you ever watched to see how many - and they type of - people who put their hands into bowls of pretzels and peanuts in bars?

By the way, having worked in a few restaurants and bars over the years, I can tell you that many food handlers - and I do mean MANY, even at so called upscale establishments - recycle unused snack for (including plates of bread you get served with dinner).

The same problem goes for bags of chips that get passed around between people. It's completely rude to stick one's hand in a bag of food that others eat from.
posted by janetplanet at 1:38 AM on February 3, 2008

Every time I hear a study like this- putting your purse on the floor coats it with germs, bowls of M&Ms are full of other peoples' germs, kid's toys are covered with germs, etc etc, I have to wonder... just how many of those germs are actually HARMFUL, and of those that are, how many of them are there, and what chance do they have of actually making me sick? I've always assumed that the chances are so minimal that it doesn't matter WHAT I do.

In third grade, I did that science project where you stick tape on household objects and apply the tape to agar, and watch the bacteria grow. My findings:

1. Everything is COVERED in bacteria. EVERYTHING.
2. I handle bacteria-coated stuff every hour of every day, and I'm still alive.

Thus:

3. Fuck it.
posted by showbiz_liz at 12:25 PM on February 3, 2008

I've always assumed that the chances are so minimal that it doesn't matter WHAT I do.

This is not correct. It does matter what you do. For example, washing your hands is clinically proven to reduce transmission of infections. I'm not saying you need to avoid party food, but it's silly to claim you have no influence on whether you get sick or make other people sick.

Everything is COVERED in bacteria. EVERYTHING.

A human mouth is considerably more likely to be contain human pathogenic bacteria than a random surface.
posted by grouse at 1:07 PM on February 3, 2008