The People's Avengers
October 27, 2009 3:47 AM Subscribe
tlhIngan tach 'el wa' tera'ngan. A Terran goes into a Klingon
chech ghaH. bar. He is drunk. He shouts
HochvaD jach <tlhInganpu', SaparHa'qu'! to everyone "I love you Klingons!
SuvwI'na' vImoj vIneHbej. I want to become a real warrior.
chay' 'e' vIta'laH?> How can I do this?"
jang chom <SuvwI'na' DamojmeH wej The bartender answers "To become
Qu' Data'nIS. a true warrior, you must carry out
Qu' wa': cha'vatlh ben HIq HIvje' three tasks. First, you must drink
naQ DatlhutlhnIS. an entire glass of 200 year old
Qu' cha': chemvaH tlhab DaSuvnIS. ale. Second, you must fight a wild
Qu' wej: tlhIngan be' DangaghnIS. chemvaH. Third, you must make love
Qu'meyvam Data'chugh, vaj SuvwI'na' to a Klingon woman. If you
Damojbej.> accomplish these tasks, you will
<lu'> jatlh tera'ngan. be a real warrior."
chomvo' cha'vatlh ben HIq HIvje' "OK" says the Terran. The human
tlhap Human 'ej nom Hoch tlhutlh. takes a glass of 200 year old ale
chechqu'choH ghaH. from the bartender and drinks it
<tugh jIchegh!> jach 'ej mej. down. He becomes very drunk. "I
nI'pu'DI' poH chegh tera'ngan. will return!" he shouts, and leaves.
HIq tlhutlhta'mo' chechqu'taH. A long time later, the Terran
SutDaj pe'lu'chu' 'ej DIrDajDaq returns. He is still very drunk
machbogh QIH law' lutu'lu'. from the ale. His clothes are torn
loQ regh. and his skin has many small injuries.
jach Human <Ha', cha' Qu' He's bleeding a little. The human
vIta'ta'! cries out "All right! I've finished
DaH, nuqDaq ghaH tlhIngan be''e' two of the tasks! Now, where's
vISuvnISbogh?> that Klingon woman I'm supposed to
fight?"
posted by netbros at 4:22 AM on October 27, 2009 [29 favorites] Ah, the sounds of a sweet Klingon choir...
posted by typewriter at 4:24 AM on October 27, 2009
posted by typewriter at 4:24 AM on October 27, 2009
That was disturbing. What human race/nation were Klingons supposed to represent? Japan?
posted by DU at 4:41 AM on October 27, 2009
posted by DU at 4:41 AM on October 27, 2009
Let a thousand nerds swoon.
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 4:44 AM on October 27, 2009
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 4:44 AM on October 27, 2009
I'm not sure it's supposed to represent any human race or nation. The YouTube comments speculate it's a teaser for the upcoming Star Trek Online multiplayer roleplaying game, where presumably you can opt to choose the Klingon side, if you're not some cowardly smooth-foreheaded gagh-spurning pahtk.
posted by TheophileEscargot at 4:55 AM on October 27, 2009 [3 favorites]
posted by TheophileEscargot at 4:55 AM on October 27, 2009 [3 favorites]
That was disturbing. What human race/nation were Klingons supposed to represent? Japan?
It seems to draw inspiration from the propaganda of the Soviet Union and People's Republic of China, it's the propaganda of a stereotypical totalitarian/communist state/empire. Although there is an Iwo Jima like moment just after the minute mark.
I imagine that if others are released we'll see a slick Starfleet propaganda piece more resembling the kind that emanates from the United States, couched in terms of freedom and universal values, that kind of thing. More subtle, less obviously imperialistic, no less insiduous.
posted by knapah at 5:09 AM on October 27, 2009 [1 favorite]
It seems to draw inspiration from the propaganda of the Soviet Union and People's Republic of China, it's the propaganda of a stereotypical totalitarian/communist state/empire. Although there is an Iwo Jima like moment just after the minute mark.
I imagine that if others are released we'll see a slick Starfleet propaganda piece more resembling the kind that emanates from the United States, couched in terms of freedom and universal values, that kind of thing. More subtle, less obviously imperialistic, no less insiduous.
posted by knapah at 5:09 AM on October 27, 2009 [1 favorite]
I actually meant who were the Klingons supposed to represent *originally* but with an eye to figuring out if this video had moved them to Japan or China.
posted by DU at 5:14 AM on October 27, 2009
posted by DU at 5:14 AM on October 27, 2009
The Russians.
posted by TheophileEscargot at 5:16 AM on October 27, 2009
posted by TheophileEscargot at 5:16 AM on October 27, 2009
I thought the Romulans were the Russians. Oh wait...Romulans...Rome. I GET IT NOW
posted by DU at 5:22 AM on October 27, 2009 [1 favorite]
posted by DU at 5:22 AM on October 27, 2009 [1 favorite]
I considered posting this, for it is awesome, but the jury's still out on whether or not we're looking at a case of KlingonBlue or not at this time. TrekMovie has a pretty good investigative thread going right now, but no concrete findings whether this is homebrew or viral marketing.
posted by EatTheWeek at 5:25 AM on October 27, 2009
posted by EatTheWeek at 5:25 AM on October 27, 2009
No wait, I was semi-right. The Klingons were racially supposed to be Japanese, but functionally Russian:
In the original television series (TOS), Klingons were typically portrayed with bronze skin and facial hair suggestive of Asian peoples, and possessed physical abilities similar to humans (in fact, Coon's only physical description of them in his "Errand of Mercy" script is "oriental" and "hard-faced".) The swarthy look of Klingon males was created with the application of shoe polish and long, thin moustaches; budget constraints would not allow any further creativity.[3] The overall look of the aliens, played by white actors, suggested orientalism, at a time when memories of Japanese actions during World War II were still fresh.[4]posted by DU at 5:25 AM on October 27, 2009
The Klingons took on the role of the Soviet Union in opposition to the United States' future counterpart, the United Federation of Planets.[6]
It seems to draw inspiration from the propaganda of the Soviet Union and People's Republic of China, it's the propaganda of a stereotypical totalitarian/communist state/empire.
The first thing that came to my mind was North Korea. Bit of all of them, I guess.
The Russians.
I always thought the Klingons made lousy Russians. Maybe they were smarter in ToS, but by TNG they were just lumbering apes ("Eaten any good books lately?”). Substitute them into a Tom Clancy novel and it just doesn’t work.
I think Cardassians make the best Russians. But what do I know.
posted by Garak at 5:40 AM on October 27, 2009 [6 favorites]
The first thing that came to my mind was North Korea. Bit of all of them, I guess.
The Russians.
I always thought the Klingons made lousy Russians. Maybe they were smarter in ToS, but by TNG they were just lumbering apes ("Eaten any good books lately?”). Substitute them into a Tom Clancy novel and it just doesn’t work.
I think Cardassians make the best Russians. But what do I know.
posted by Garak at 5:40 AM on October 27, 2009 [6 favorites]
All I know is that whoever had the idea to put a Ferengi in a Hawaiian shirt in whatever episode of TNG that was completely saved the entire species.
They were such a disastrous fail on their original appearance, with the laser whips and the pathetic toadying. Complete waste of an alien race. But make them sleazy con men and they worked. Sleazy con men in Hawaiian shirts, to be precise. They went from complete embarrassment to Quark in DS9, who was actually a well-realized and useful character.
posted by Naberius at 6:49 AM on October 27, 2009 [2 favorites]
They were such a disastrous fail on their original appearance, with the laser whips and the pathetic toadying. Complete waste of an alien race. But make them sleazy con men and they worked. Sleazy con men in Hawaiian shirts, to be precise. They went from complete embarrassment to Quark in DS9, who was actually a well-realized and useful character.
posted by Naberius at 6:49 AM on October 27, 2009 [2 favorites]
Someone nerdier than I has translated the URL at the end. There are wallpapers for download, so I'm going to go ahead and say this is kinda Pepsi Blue.
Fun fact: Klingon is a supported language in Blu-ray.
posted by infinitewindow at 7:33 AM on October 27, 2009
Fun fact: Klingon is a supported language in Blu-ray.
posted by infinitewindow at 7:33 AM on October 27, 2009
Someone far, far nerdier than I has translated the entire voiceover (from the TrekMovie comments):
[...]the grammar is… creative. It seems like someone translated English into Klingon on paper, read that paper for the voice over, and then typed the paper for the subtitles (introducing more errors). Here’s my very loose ‘translation’ of what it’s roughly trying to say:
We’re Klingon Imperials
Many dozens of star systems have argued with us
and this expansion reaches many more every day.
You can influence the planet, but how?
C’mon, let’s go! Join up!
Contribute to the pleasures of the Klingon Homeworld,
the Empire is prosperous to everyone:
Wealthy and ancient civilizations;
Competitions;
and good eats!
Our Klingon ‘yeni cheri’ (Turkish for ‘new troops’)
are many, fair, and brave.
Take spoils from conquered species;
and many soldiers get in it for the Empire.
The Klingon empire powerfully protects an important planet
that was a slit and decaying dictatorship or some crap.
Put down your puny weapons,
open your hearts and minds,
join the Klingon Empire now!
Get ready to conquer!
Gain justice now!
Also, the music is apparently a Turkish children's song.
posted by Vectorcon Systems at 7:40 AM on October 27, 2009 [2 favorites]
[...]the grammar is… creative. It seems like someone translated English into Klingon on paper, read that paper for the voice over, and then typed the paper for the subtitles (introducing more errors). Here’s my very loose ‘translation’ of what it’s roughly trying to say:
We’re Klingon Imperials
Many dozens of star systems have argued with us
and this expansion reaches many more every day.
You can influence the planet, but how?
C’mon, let’s go! Join up!
Contribute to the pleasures of the Klingon Homeworld,
the Empire is prosperous to everyone:
Wealthy and ancient civilizations;
Competitions;
and good eats!
Our Klingon ‘yeni cheri’ (Turkish for ‘new troops’)
are many, fair, and brave.
Take spoils from conquered species;
and many soldiers get in it for the Empire.
The Klingon empire powerfully protects an important planet
that was a slit and decaying dictatorship or some crap.
Put down your puny weapons,
open your hearts and minds,
join the Klingon Empire now!
Get ready to conquer!
Gain justice now!
Also, the music is apparently a Turkish children's song.
posted by Vectorcon Systems at 7:40 AM on October 27, 2009 [2 favorites]
Sorta cute, but wouldn't it make more sense to use Fascist imagery for the Klingon Empire than North Korean communist imagery? And the recurring children are way too placid and spiritual, they should be tearing each other apart with their teeth in ritual combat.
posted by Nelson at 7:50 AM on October 27, 2009
posted by Nelson at 7:50 AM on October 27, 2009
Hmm. The cat licking the dagger (about 1:26) seems obviously modeled on John Colicos as Kor ("it would have been glorious") from Errand of Mercy.
Interesting that, cos everyone else in the thing looks pretty generic.
posted by Herodios at 7:56 AM on October 27, 2009
Interesting that, cos everyone else in the thing looks pretty generic.
posted by Herodios at 7:56 AM on October 27, 2009
I really, really hope if this is anything that it is an advance viral for the next movie, and not the online game.
Also, as a viral for the online game this wouldn't really work, as it's setting is post Nemesis, and the ships are modified TOS era designs. Plus, Klingons were Federation allies by then. And Kor, shown at the end, died in DS9 at a pretty advanced age.
...what?
posted by Kellydamnit at 8:03 AM on October 27, 2009
Also, as a viral for the online game this wouldn't really work, as it's setting is post Nemesis, and the ships are modified TOS era designs. Plus, Klingons were Federation allies by then. And Kor, shown at the end, died in DS9 at a pretty advanced age.
...what?
posted by Kellydamnit at 8:03 AM on October 27, 2009
Needs more footage of Kim Jong Il riding a horse.
posted by TheWhiteSkull at 8:29 AM on October 27, 2009
posted by TheWhiteSkull at 8:29 AM on October 27, 2009
Sorry, fail. I cannot imagine a Klingon propaganda piece that would have children singing, and people eating, etc. Way way to pastoral.
There would be blood, guts VICTORY, fighting, blood guts and VICTORY. And many shots of the VICTORIUS STRONG RACE THAT WILL WIN THROUGH FORCE!
Just MHO, take it for what it is worth.
posted by Antidisestablishmentarianist at 9:11 AM on October 27, 2009
There would be blood, guts VICTORY, fighting, blood guts and VICTORY. And many shots of the VICTORIUS STRONG RACE THAT WILL WIN THROUGH FORCE!
Just MHO, take it for what it is worth.
posted by Antidisestablishmentarianist at 9:11 AM on October 27, 2009
From Earth responds.
"People say the guys don't give good H.E.D. but I do!"
posted by Wet Spot
meta-eponysterical!
posted by humannaire at 9:32 AM on October 27, 2009
"People say the guys don't give good H.E.D. but I do!"
posted by Wet Spot
meta-eponysterical!
posted by humannaire at 9:32 AM on October 27, 2009
Appreciation and Confusion at Metafilter.
posted by ChurchHatesTucker at 10:07 AM on October 27, 2009
posted by ChurchHatesTucker at 10:07 AM on October 27, 2009
>
Also, as a viral for the online game this wouldn't really work, as it's setting is post Nemesis, and the ships are modified TOS era designs. Plus, Klingons were Federation allies by then. And Kor, shown at the end, died in DS9 at a pretty advanced age.
I think that it's supposed to be "classic"-era Klingon propaganda--they're still wearing TOS uniforms, and their forehead ridges aren't that pronounced, meaning that the Augment virus effect hadn't been completely reversed yet--in the same way that the Soviet-style propaganda that this is based on stopped being used well before the end of the Cold War. Kor doesn't look that old, for one thing.
posted by Halloween Jack at 10:22 AM on October 27, 2009
Also, as a viral for the online game this wouldn't really work, as it's setting is post Nemesis, and the ships are modified TOS era designs. Plus, Klingons were Federation allies by then. And Kor, shown at the end, died in DS9 at a pretty advanced age.
I think that it's supposed to be "classic"-era Klingon propaganda--they're still wearing TOS uniforms, and their forehead ridges aren't that pronounced, meaning that the Augment virus effect hadn't been completely reversed yet--in the same way that the Soviet-style propaganda that this is based on stopped being used well before the end of the Cold War. Kor doesn't look that old, for one thing.
posted by Halloween Jack at 10:22 AM on October 27, 2009
Ah, never mind--I see your point, Kellydamnit.
However, Antidisestablishmentarianist:
>Sorry, fail. I cannot imagine a Klingon propaganda piece that would have children singing, and people eating, etc. Way way to pastoral.
Klingons are well-known for their cuisine and classical music.
posted by Halloween Jack at 10:28 AM on October 27, 2009
However, Antidisestablishmentarianist:
>Sorry, fail. I cannot imagine a Klingon propaganda piece that would have children singing, and people eating, etc. Way way to pastoral.
Klingons are well-known for their cuisine and classical music.
posted by Halloween Jack at 10:28 AM on October 27, 2009
I think Cardassians make the best Russians. But what do I know.
posted by Garak at 5:40 AM on October 27 [3 favorites -] Favorite added! [!]
After all, you are just a plain, simple tailor!
posted by PhoBWanKenobi at 2:17 PM on October 27, 2009 [3 favorites]
posted by Garak at 5:40 AM on October 27 [3 favorites -] Favorite added! [!]
After all, you are just a plain, simple tailor!
posted by PhoBWanKenobi at 2:17 PM on October 27, 2009 [3 favorites]
Would you believe that I am a dealer in kivas and trillium?
posted by Ruthless Bunny at 6:26 AM on October 28, 2009
posted by Ruthless Bunny at 6:26 AM on October 28, 2009
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