She's sweet 16 and never been kissed! Never!
May 8, 2010 8:45 PM Subscribe
Pamela's Prayer: This heartfelt motion picture presents the highest standard of purity before marriage. Remember, a kiss isn't something you should just give away!
IMDB sez it was filmed in Colorado Springs. Boy oh boy, that's not surprising.
posted by barnacles at 8:51 PM on May 8, 2010 [2 favorites]
posted by barnacles at 8:51 PM on May 8, 2010 [2 favorites]
This is LOLXIAN and an extremely weak post.
posted by desjardins at 8:54 PM on May 8, 2010 [1 favorite]
posted by desjardins at 8:54 PM on May 8, 2010 [1 favorite]
Boy howdy, growing up in an environment where movies like that are taken seriously does a number on you.
I honestly had no idea such places existed until I saw these clips. Ironically, I didn't lip lock anyone till after high school--but of course, I was properly depressed about that.
posted by PhoBWanKenobi at 8:54 PM on May 8, 2010
I honestly had no idea such places existed until I saw these clips. Ironically, I didn't lip lock anyone till after high school--but of course, I was properly depressed about that.
posted by PhoBWanKenobi at 8:54 PM on May 8, 2010
Also, let me tell you: Pamela's Prayer does not in any way present the highest standard of purity. Pamela is clearly pictured throughout the film without any head-covering; a kiss from a boy would simply be a visible manifestation of the spiritually unprotected life she is already living. Bonnets 4 Life.
posted by verb at 8:58 PM on May 8, 2010 [16 favorites]
posted by verb at 8:58 PM on May 8, 2010 [16 favorites]
This is LOLXIAN and an extremely weak post.Yeah; it actually makes me want to put together something more comprehensive on the courtship/purity movement that's really got deep roots in the home schooling community. There's a lot more to it than kitschy movies, and I think it's interesting in the extreme. But, yeah, hard to avoid it turning into LOXIANS.
posted by verb at 8:59 PM on May 8, 2010 [1 favorite]
I attended a coworker's wedding, prior to which he'd explained how for months prior to the wedding (three or four, I believe), upon suggestion from a church leader, they refrained from kissing or touching in any way. It was explained to me that this was a way of bringing some manner of purity back to their relationship and ensuring that their wedding kiss would be particularly special.
The way he explained it I felt that it made sense for him, but I couldn't help but get the feeling that something it was somehow avoiding some actual issues or trying to find a way to grasp at hope that it would all work out.
posted by c0nsumer at 9:02 PM on May 8, 2010
The way he explained it I felt that it made sense for him, but I couldn't help but get the feeling that something it was somehow avoiding some actual issues or trying to find a way to grasp at hope that it would all work out.
posted by c0nsumer at 9:02 PM on May 8, 2010
This is LOLXIAN and an extremely weak post.
Wasn't my intent--I found it interesting mostly because of the campyness of the acting (esp. the dad) and the production values, although the message of extreme abstinence did seem to me to be . . . well, extreme.
posted by PhoBWanKenobi at 9:04 PM on May 8, 2010
Wasn't my intent--I found it interesting mostly because of the campyness of the acting (esp. the dad) and the production values, although the message of extreme abstinence did seem to me to be . . . well, extreme.
posted by PhoBWanKenobi at 9:04 PM on May 8, 2010
No post on having a wedding first kiss is complete without the fantastic kiss at the Duggar wedding.
posted by Stynxno at 9:04 PM on May 8, 2010 [2 favorites]
posted by Stynxno at 9:04 PM on May 8, 2010 [2 favorites]
There's a way that Pamela can always be close to the boys she likes, but never have to worry about kissing them at all. And that's if Pamela and the boys she likes are surgically refashioned into the human centipede.
well, I guess that's a little like kissing, now that I think about it
posted by kittens for breakfast at 9:20 PM on May 8, 2010 [15 favorites]
well, I guess that's a little like kissing, now that I think about it
posted by kittens for breakfast at 9:20 PM on May 8, 2010 [15 favorites]
I watched this on "Inspiration" or one of those channels probably 10 years ago. It's funnier than the most unintentionally funny Hallmark Hall of Fame by about 50%. Make time for it.
posted by Mayor Curley at 9:23 PM on May 8, 2010
posted by Mayor Curley at 9:23 PM on May 8, 2010
No post on having a wedding first kiss is complete without the fantastic kiss at the Duggar wedding.
You know, it's funny. The Duggar clip makes the fact that they saved their first kiss for their wedding, well, maybe not romantic, but at least a decision made by two consenting adults and therefore right for them while still being pretty transgressive (plus--sound effects!). Whereas Pamela's Prayer makes it look like choosing not to kiss anyone till marriage just means lots of tearful talks with dad and chilly nights spent dashing off alone through the cold and dark. Plus, no sound effects. I think perhaps the writer should have hired the Duggars to pen this film if they wanted to be more convincing in their message.
posted by PhoBWanKenobi at 9:29 PM on May 8, 2010
You know, it's funny. The Duggar clip makes the fact that they saved their first kiss for their wedding, well, maybe not romantic, but at least a decision made by two consenting adults and therefore right for them while still being pretty transgressive (plus--sound effects!). Whereas Pamela's Prayer makes it look like choosing not to kiss anyone till marriage just means lots of tearful talks with dad and chilly nights spent dashing off alone through the cold and dark. Plus, no sound effects. I think perhaps the writer should have hired the Duggars to pen this film if they wanted to be more convincing in their message.
posted by PhoBWanKenobi at 9:29 PM on May 8, 2010
This is like a really chaste Twin Peaks.
posted by oinopaponton at 9:52 PM on May 8, 2010 [5 favorites]
posted by oinopaponton at 9:52 PM on May 8, 2010 [5 favorites]
Oral sex is still allowed though, right?
posted by Astro Zombie at 10:12 PM on May 8, 2010 [8 favorites]
posted by Astro Zombie at 10:12 PM on May 8, 2010 [8 favorites]
What mensches. L'chaim!
posted by not_on_display at 10:17 PM on May 8, 2010 [1 favorite]
posted by not_on_display at 10:17 PM on May 8, 2010 [1 favorite]
Am I the only one who found the dad creepy?
Dads whose daughters are involved in "purity" stuff are almost invariably creepy.
posted by maxwelton at 10:17 PM on May 8, 2010 [8 favorites]
Dads whose daughters are involved in "purity" stuff are almost invariably creepy.
posted by maxwelton at 10:17 PM on May 8, 2010 [8 favorites]
Wow. I found the first twenty minutes online, and it definitely does not make the dad look any better. That blonde girl Jessica evidently has the very low standard of "only dating guys who are Christians," which the creepy father lectures Pamela disapprovingly on, as Pamela has to wait for God (i.e. her dad) to find her husband *for* her (no dating Christians for her!), then when Jessica goes and sleeps with that Jerry guy (the one who lied about kissing Pamela), Pamela and her father have a heartfelt prayer session for her sitting in dim lighting on Pamela's bed. There are a lot of prayer sessions in dim lighting sitting on Pamela's bed. Jessica is also totally, totally distraught and guilty about the sex. Like, I wouldn't be surprised if Jessica ended up killing herself later in the movie.
The dad is only of moderate levels of creepy in short doses, but when literally 17 of the 20 minutes I just watched was him lecturing Pamela on purity and her wedding bed and how she can never, ever, under any circumstances ever let anyone kiss her, followed by him, um, kissing her (on the cheek, at least), the low level creepiness multiples into a much severer cumulative creepiness.
That said, while it was fun cackling at this, it probably would have been better as part of a more in-depth post. Now I'm going to go search for sections 3-5. Dammit.
posted by wending my way at 10:41 PM on May 8, 2010 [7 favorites]
The dad is only of moderate levels of creepy in short doses, but when literally 17 of the 20 minutes I just watched was him lecturing Pamela on purity and her wedding bed and how she can never, ever, under any circumstances ever let anyone kiss her, followed by him, um, kissing her (on the cheek, at least), the low level creepiness multiples into a much severer cumulative creepiness.
That said, while it was fun cackling at this, it probably would have been better as part of a more in-depth post. Now I'm going to go search for sections 3-5. Dammit.
posted by wending my way at 10:41 PM on May 8, 2010 [7 favorites]
I hate when a trailer gives away the whole movie.
posted by longsleeves at 10:46 PM on May 8, 2010
posted by longsleeves at 10:46 PM on May 8, 2010
Sorry for the double post. The Amazon reviews for this are too good...
"If you've ever thought about kissing..."
"my mom and dad were getting a little uncomfortable during the scenes leading up to the wedding, thinking that maybe we should send my daughters out of the room. But I reassured them...the movie *does not* show the wedding kiss."
"Finally, a film with good morals AND realistic dialogue. This is no 'Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen Visit Grandma's'" (I sure hope they were knocking the dialogue in MKA films, because in the grandmother one, the Olsens appear to be about six.)
From a negative reviewer - "This movie put ideas in [my kids'] heads that weren't there before... we show them this 'Christian' film and everything is down the toilet. all they talk about is kissing now!" (The kids in question are 13 and 7.)
posted by wending my way at 10:54 PM on May 8, 2010 [4 favorites]
"If you've ever thought about kissing..."
"my mom and dad were getting a little uncomfortable during the scenes leading up to the wedding, thinking that maybe we should send my daughters out of the room. But I reassured them...the movie *does not* show the wedding kiss."
"Finally, a film with good morals AND realistic dialogue. This is no 'Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen Visit Grandma's'" (I sure hope they were knocking the dialogue in MKA films, because in the grandmother one, the Olsens appear to be about six.)
From a negative reviewer - "This movie put ideas in [my kids'] heads that weren't there before... we show them this 'Christian' film and everything is down the toilet. all they talk about is kissing now!" (The kids in question are 13 and 7.)
posted by wending my way at 10:54 PM on May 8, 2010 [4 favorites]
Apparently I am a raging slut simply because I will happily make out with anyone over the age of 20.
posted by koeselitz at 10:56 PM on May 8, 2010
posted by koeselitz at 10:56 PM on May 8, 2010
Seriously, anyone. It's been a really long time.
posted by koeselitz at 10:56 PM on May 8, 2010 [9 favorites]
posted by koeselitz at 10:56 PM on May 8, 2010 [9 favorites]
It's only a matter of time before the fundamentalists start putting their daughters into burqas.
posted by quarsan at 11:07 PM on May 8, 2010
posted by quarsan at 11:07 PM on May 8, 2010
So, this is what Christianity has come to!
People watch these kinds of things, and tell themselves that makes them good God fearing folk. Really?
Don't they know this stuff is made-up stories? It's fiction, and that means lies. They should be reading there bible, not wasting time. Where will it end? I ask you, where will it end? With the devil, that's where
posted by Some1 at 11:14 PM on May 8, 2010
People watch these kinds of things, and tell themselves that makes them good God fearing folk. Really?
Don't they know this stuff is made-up stories? It's fiction, and that means lies. They should be reading there bible, not wasting time. Where will it end? I ask you, where will it end? With the devil, that's where
posted by Some1 at 11:14 PM on May 8, 2010
I'm saving kissing for marriage too. That's why I only engage in saddlebacking.
posted by NoraReed at 11:40 PM on May 8, 2010 [5 favorites]
posted by NoraReed at 11:40 PM on May 8, 2010 [5 favorites]
I would like to add that right after I first saw this movie I called the Christiano's about it. I can't recall if I talked to Rich or Dave, but whichever one it was, it was the rudest phone call I have ever experienced in relation to the movies. In essence, he told me that I was going to Hell for not agreeing with him that it is a sin for teens to kiss! He also insinuated that I didn't know enough about the movie business to evaluate the quality of his firm's movies.
posted by anazgnos at 12:45 AM on May 9, 2010
the costuming amazingly true to the era (the movie takes place between 1970 and present day)
Yes, I have never been so transported as I was by this film's presentation of characters wearing items such as pants, shirts, and dresses. Not an anachronistic hoop-skirt or laser hologram necktie to be seen anywhere.
posted by anazgnos at 12:58 AM on May 9, 2010 [7 favorites]
Yes, I have never been so transported as I was by this film's presentation of characters wearing items such as pants, shirts, and dresses. Not an anachronistic hoop-skirt or laser hologram necktie to be seen anywhere.
posted by anazgnos at 12:58 AM on May 9, 2010 [7 favorites]
Oh man. That Duggar's first kiss that stynxno included looks awful. There's a reason why most people have their first kiss before they're 18-- it's just too horrible to be something that should happen between adults.
stynxno's link
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EdYvt_XxPAU
skip to 5:45
posted by samthemander at 1:39 AM on May 9, 2010
stynxno's link
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EdYvt_XxPAU
skip to 5:45
posted by samthemander at 1:39 AM on May 9, 2010
This is just absurd.
Sex and associated behaviors, to me, are not just a way of sharing (one of) the deepest and closest form of emotional intimacy that human beings have access to. It's also a physical skill. Like all physical skills, one gets better at it with practice.
Wanting to marry someone who is a virgin, to me, is somewhat analogous to specifically going out to drive across country, a long and potentially dangerous trip, with someone who has never driven a car before. Even worse, intentionally not taking lessons oneself, just so you and your co-driver can have the experience of learning together. Even worse, being against the idea of reading driver's educational manuals.
Now, there aren't really other people on that road, unless you want there to be, and if this is your plan, it's safe to say you don't ... when you set out ... but there may be later. And it's unlikely your fumbling attempts will actually do you harm. There are medical emergency room stories about penile fracture, and vaginal injuries of various kinds inflicted by "size mismatch", but these are rare. And if the "Gama Su!, Gama Su!" joke has any basis in fact, it'll be figured out soon enough.
Nobody's going to suffer from your inexperienced and therefore subcompetent techniques but you and your partner. But it just seems absurd to treat it as anything desirable. Show me a man who wants a virgin bride, and I'll show you a man who is crap in bed and wants someone who doesn't know the difference. Show me a woman who wants a virgin husband, and I'll show you a woman who has huge attractiveness insecurity issues.
posted by aeschenkarnos at 2:55 AM on May 9, 2010 [1 favorite]
Sex and associated behaviors, to me, are not just a way of sharing (one of) the deepest and closest form of emotional intimacy that human beings have access to. It's also a physical skill. Like all physical skills, one gets better at it with practice.
Wanting to marry someone who is a virgin, to me, is somewhat analogous to specifically going out to drive across country, a long and potentially dangerous trip, with someone who has never driven a car before. Even worse, intentionally not taking lessons oneself, just so you and your co-driver can have the experience of learning together. Even worse, being against the idea of reading driver's educational manuals.
Now, there aren't really other people on that road, unless you want there to be, and if this is your plan, it's safe to say you don't ... when you set out ... but there may be later. And it's unlikely your fumbling attempts will actually do you harm. There are medical emergency room stories about penile fracture, and vaginal injuries of various kinds inflicted by "size mismatch", but these are rare. And if the "Gama Su!, Gama Su!" joke has any basis in fact, it'll be figured out soon enough.
Nobody's going to suffer from your inexperienced and therefore subcompetent techniques but you and your partner. But it just seems absurd to treat it as anything desirable. Show me a man who wants a virgin bride, and I'll show you a man who is crap in bed and wants someone who doesn't know the difference. Show me a woman who wants a virgin husband, and I'll show you a woman who has huge attractiveness insecurity issues.
posted by aeschenkarnos at 2:55 AM on May 9, 2010 [1 favorite]
If we accept that virgins are full of inexperience and subcompetent techniques, and that one should not want to marry a virgin because they are full of inexperience and subcompetent techniques, why should anyone want to have sex with a virgin at all
They cure AIDS. Duh.
Sincerely,
Mayor Curley
South African Minister of Health, Emeritus
posted by Mayor Curley at 4:34 AM on May 9, 2010 [1 favorite]
They cure AIDS. Duh.
Sincerely,
Mayor Curley
South African Minister of Health, Emeritus
posted by Mayor Curley at 4:34 AM on May 9, 2010 [1 favorite]
Okay, so the father is the one lecturing the daughter about purity and holding out until marriage and so forth. Where's the mother in all this?
posted by spoobnooble at 4:42 AM on May 9, 2010
posted by spoobnooble at 4:42 AM on May 9, 2010
Where's the mother in all this?
She's dead. Dad found out that she had fleetingly kissed another boy at bible camp six years before they met. He exercised his rights outlined in Leviticus and threw her in a quarry.
posted by Mayor Curley at 4:49 AM on May 9, 2010 [14 favorites]
She's dead. Dad found out that she had fleetingly kissed another boy at bible camp six years before they met. He exercised his rights outlined in Leviticus and threw her in a quarry.
posted by Mayor Curley at 4:49 AM on May 9, 2010 [14 favorites]
Apparently I am a raging slut simply because I will happily make out with anyone over the age of 20.Geeze, what do you have against barely legal teenagers?
posted by planet at 5:16 AM on May 9, 2010
...why should anyone want to have sex with a virgin at all, if those same levels of incompetence and inexperience are still there?
That's a pretty good argument against hiring a virgin prostitute, but presumably for most people they're having sex at least partially for love. Some of the time.
posted by anifinder at 5:24 AM on May 9, 2010
That's a pretty good argument against hiring a virgin prostitute, but presumably for most people they're having sex at least partially for love. Some of the time.
posted by anifinder at 5:24 AM on May 9, 2010
23skidoo and that one should not want to marry a virgin because they are full of inexperience and subcompetent techniques, why should anyone want to have sex with a virgin at all, if those same levels of incompetence and inexperience are still there? And if no one should want to have sex with virgins, how is anyone supposed to get laid?
One should marry a person one loves and can sustain a lifelong relationship with. I don't see how virginity has any place in that decision at all, except as a minor negative trait, easily addressed. Refusal to marry a non-virgin, looking for a virgin to marry, remaining a virgin until marriage etc - all of these seem to me to be silly things to do.
As for how a virgin is supposed to get laid, same way anyone else gets laid: have sex with someone they like and trust and are attracted to. Preferably love, but that's rarely mutual, especially at first.
My objection is to the making of a great big deal out of a silly thing like virginity. Desperate and stupid actions to lose one's virginity are even worse than foolishly hanging onto it.
posted by aeschenkarnos at 5:42 AM on May 9, 2010
One should marry a person one loves and can sustain a lifelong relationship with. I don't see how virginity has any place in that decision at all, except as a minor negative trait, easily addressed. Refusal to marry a non-virgin, looking for a virgin to marry, remaining a virgin until marriage etc - all of these seem to me to be silly things to do.
As for how a virgin is supposed to get laid, same way anyone else gets laid: have sex with someone they like and trust and are attracted to. Preferably love, but that's rarely mutual, especially at first.
My objection is to the making of a great big deal out of a silly thing like virginity. Desperate and stupid actions to lose one's virginity are even worse than foolishly hanging onto it.
posted by aeschenkarnos at 5:42 AM on May 9, 2010
Also, teaching is fun, and few things are more fun to teach. The distinction is why you are teaching them. Is it to introduce them to this enjoyable and intimate activity, for their happiness, or is it to have someone "unspoiled" to keep for yourself?
posted by aeschenkarnos at 5:48 AM on May 9, 2010
posted by aeschenkarnos at 5:48 AM on May 9, 2010
There are a lot of prayer sessions in dim lighting sitting on Pamela's bed. Jessica is also totally, totally distraught and guilty about the sex. Like, I wouldn't be surprised if Jessica ended up killing herself later in the movie.
In the new millennium update to this movie, Jessica will end up as $2 crack whore who Pamela will tearfully recognize one day as she's driving her kid-filled mini-van past a local strip mall.
The dad is only of moderate levels of creepy in short doses, but when literally 17 of the 20 minutes I just watched was him lecturing Pamela on purity and her wedding bed and how she can never, ever, under any circumstances ever let anyone kiss her, followed by him, um, kissing her (on the cheek, at least), the low level creepiness multiples into a much severer cumulative creepiness.
In the new millennium update, we'll find out that the dad was sneaking into Pamela's bedroom late at night, doing everything but kissing or having PIV sex with her.
posted by fuse theorem at 5:52 AM on May 9, 2010
In the new millennium update to this movie, Jessica will end up as $2 crack whore who Pamela will tearfully recognize one day as she's driving her kid-filled mini-van past a local strip mall.
The dad is only of moderate levels of creepy in short doses, but when literally 17 of the 20 minutes I just watched was him lecturing Pamela on purity and her wedding bed and how she can never, ever, under any circumstances ever let anyone kiss her, followed by him, um, kissing her (on the cheek, at least), the low level creepiness multiples into a much severer cumulative creepiness.
In the new millennium update, we'll find out that the dad was sneaking into Pamela's bedroom late at night, doing everything but kissing or having PIV sex with her.
posted by fuse theorem at 5:52 AM on May 9, 2010
I haven't watched the clip but I assume it's from a subset of Christianity that ....I have issues with. It would be worth a FFP but I don't know that I'd be up to putting it together.
I do remember that with my hubby and myself, we decided that the first kiss would be when I got my engagement ring (we got engaged before the actual getting of the ring, long story. )
I STILL remember that kiss in detail, 27 years later. Ooh baby!!!!
So, just delaying a kiss in itself, I don't have a problem with.
posted by St. Alia of the Bunnies at 5:55 AM on May 9, 2010 [1 favorite]
I do remember that with my hubby and myself, we decided that the first kiss would be when I got my engagement ring (we got engaged before the actual getting of the ring, long story. )
I STILL remember that kiss in detail, 27 years later. Ooh baby!!!!
So, just delaying a kiss in itself, I don't have a problem with.
posted by St. Alia of the Bunnies at 5:55 AM on May 9, 2010 [1 favorite]
Generally speaking, I don't have a problem with consenting adults making informed choices that don't harm other people.
When these same adults begin to indoctrinate their children into their worldviews, though, I'm not always so comfortable with it. And things like purity balls and FGM can have a patriarchal/repressive/sexist vibe that rubs a lot of folks the wrong way (and there's some data that suggests that, much like abstinence-only education, they're not particularly effective at preventing either premarital sex or STDs).
Which is a roundabout way of saying that I don't think it's the delaying-a-kiss part that people have a problem with.
posted by box at 6:10 AM on May 9, 2010 [1 favorite]
When these same adults begin to indoctrinate their children into their worldviews, though, I'm not always so comfortable with it. And things like purity balls and FGM can have a patriarchal/repressive/sexist vibe that rubs a lot of folks the wrong way (and there's some data that suggests that, much like abstinence-only education, they're not particularly effective at preventing either premarital sex or STDs).
Which is a roundabout way of saying that I don't think it's the delaying-a-kiss part that people have a problem with.
posted by box at 6:10 AM on May 9, 2010 [1 favorite]
Apparently the only person qualified to give this girl advice is the Man of the House. Praise Jaysus!
posted by TrialByMedia at 6:29 AM on May 9, 2010
posted by TrialByMedia at 6:29 AM on May 9, 2010
U don't have 2 be rich 2 be my girl
U don't have 2 be cool 2 rule my world
Ain't no particular sign I'm more compatible with
I just want your extra time and your . . . . . kiss
posted by bwg at 6:36 AM on May 9, 2010 [1 favorite]
U don't have 2 be cool 2 rule my world
Ain't no particular sign I'm more compatible with
I just want your extra time and your . . . . . kiss
posted by bwg at 6:36 AM on May 9, 2010 [1 favorite]
Oh man. That Duggar's first kiss that stynxno included looks awful. There's a reason why most people have their first kiss before they're 18-- it's just too horrible to be something that should happen between adults.
It looks better than my first kiss was (which was on a couch, while watching Lock, Stock, and Two Smoking Barrels). However, I'm beyond glad that there wasn't a church full of people watching. When couples wait until marriage to have sex, the act itself is still something private. This reminds me of the medieval hanging of the matrimony sheets.
posted by PhoBWanKenobi at 6:52 AM on May 9, 2010 [1 favorite]
It looks better than my first kiss was (which was on a couch, while watching Lock, Stock, and Two Smoking Barrels). However, I'm beyond glad that there wasn't a church full of people watching. When couples wait until marriage to have sex, the act itself is still something private. This reminds me of the medieval hanging of the matrimony sheets.
posted by PhoBWanKenobi at 6:52 AM on May 9, 2010 [1 favorite]
"Maybe the Lord is trying to teach you a lesson; if you had obeyed your father none of this would have happened."
What a handy, all-purpose phrase that is! Kid falls down and skins his knee. Dog eats child's homework. OJ spills all over the table. Teenager gets mono from shared water bottle. Guy slices off finger in wood shop. Girl gets gang-kissed at the big game. Youth kills his best friend during tragic fellatio accident.
Never forget! Every time something bad happens, it is God trying to teach you a lesson. (You big dummy.)
posted by Secret Life of Gravy at 6:53 AM on May 9, 2010
What a handy, all-purpose phrase that is! Kid falls down and skins his knee. Dog eats child's homework. OJ spills all over the table. Teenager gets mono from shared water bottle. Guy slices off finger in wood shop. Girl gets gang-kissed at the big game. Youth kills his best friend during tragic fellatio accident.
Never forget! Every time something bad happens, it is God trying to teach you a lesson. (You big dummy.)
posted by Secret Life of Gravy at 6:53 AM on May 9, 2010
I do remember that with my hubby and myself, we decided that the first kiss would be when I got my engagement ring (we got engaged before the actual getting of the ring, long story. )
I STILL remember that kiss in detail, 27 years later. Ooh baby!!!!
So, just delaying a kiss in itself, I don't have a problem with.
St. Alia, I'm curious--how long did you and your hubby date before you got your engagement ring/kissed? Was it difficult not to? My second date with my husband consisted largely of a three hour make out session. In fact, that was how the first three months or so went. I can't imagine having abstained from that--either wanting to or being able to.
posted by PhoBWanKenobi at 6:55 AM on May 9, 2010
I STILL remember that kiss in detail, 27 years later. Ooh baby!!!!
So, just delaying a kiss in itself, I don't have a problem with.
St. Alia, I'm curious--how long did you and your hubby date before you got your engagement ring/kissed? Was it difficult not to? My second date with my husband consisted largely of a three hour make out session. In fact, that was how the first three months or so went. I can't imagine having abstained from that--either wanting to or being able to.
posted by PhoBWanKenobi at 6:55 AM on May 9, 2010
I got engaged the day before our first date. Like I said, LOOONG story. But to address the issue, I got the ring a couple of weeks later. Not that long to wait. ;-) Besides, we were at a rather conservative charismatic bible school, and there were a lot of rules. Fortunately for us, the rules only said you couldn't socialize in a PARKED car-let's just say whenever we went somewhere, we took the road that had the most stoplights. :D
posted by St. Alia of the Bunnies at 7:12 AM on May 9, 2010 [2 favorites]
posted by St. Alia of the Bunnies at 7:12 AM on May 9, 2010 [2 favorites]
wending my way: " The Amazon reviews for this are too good...
If more people beleived like her, there would be a lot less abortions and pregant ladies.
Most people I share it with don't like it because it is not a new film, high paces, or they feel that the life style is not attainable. I feel this movie does not get the support it deserve. I LOVE IT!
Pamela's Prayer is a movie that really stands--almost alone--against the legions of immoral junk films produced by Hollywood's "Kissing Industry."
my son is 13 and my daughter is 7 - and we have not let them watch videos, we block out the satellite channels and don't let them on the internet. and now we show them this 'Christian' film and everything is down the toilet. all they talk about is kissing now!
posted by Secret Life of Gravy at 7:19 AM on May 9, 2010
If more people beleived like her, there would be a lot less abortions and pregant ladies.
Most people I share it with don't like it because it is not a new film, high paces, or they feel that the life style is not attainable. I feel this movie does not get the support it deserve. I LOVE IT!
Pamela's Prayer is a movie that really stands--almost alone--against the legions of immoral junk films produced by Hollywood's "Kissing Industry."
my son is 13 and my daughter is 7 - and we have not let them watch videos, we block out the satellite channels and don't let them on the internet. and now we show them this 'Christian' film and everything is down the toilet. all they talk about is kissing now!
posted by Secret Life of Gravy at 7:19 AM on May 9, 2010
One youth group night when I was in 8th grade we had a discussion on purity and marriage kissing. The youth group leaders, in general, supported the idea that 1) absolutely sex before marriage was a no-no and that 2) kissing before marriage was probably not a good idea but if you'd already kissed someone, things would probably still be okay. Later on we talked about dealbreakers, like would we be willing to date someone if we knew they'd already had sex? What if we were engaged to be married and THEN found out they weren't a virgin? What if (and this was posed to the young men in an attempt to elicit thought and empathy and perhaps some open-mindedness) the girl you were engaged to revealed to you that she'd been raped? That she'd never had consensual sex, but had been forced into sexual relations? One 14 year old boy spoke up and said that he would have to break off the engagement, as he could never marry a woman who was "impure sexually." Just couldn't do it. Deal breaker.
The youth groups leaders, who were thankfully aghast at this mentality, tried to reason with him that surely if a young girl was raped, if the "sex" was against her will, surely she could be considered a spiritual virgin, and should not be considered impure. The kid was not to be dissuaded though, he was pretty adamant. He was a really good looking kid but after that, no girl in the youth group ever remotely considered dating him.
posted by hegemone at 7:22 AM on May 9, 2010
The youth groups leaders, who were thankfully aghast at this mentality, tried to reason with him that surely if a young girl was raped, if the "sex" was against her will, surely she could be considered a spiritual virgin, and should not be considered impure. The kid was not to be dissuaded though, he was pretty adamant. He was a really good looking kid but after that, no girl in the youth group ever remotely considered dating him.
posted by hegemone at 7:22 AM on May 9, 2010
I think for me the absolute creepiest part, even more than the conversations on her bed, is at 2:00 when Pamela confesses to her Dad that Jessica makes out with her own boyfriend, and Dad has to sit down, real slow, because the weight of disappointment is so overpowering, and also because he looks like he's thinking "Oh Lord Father in heaven if I could only police other teen girls' ripe, burgeoning sexualities like I can with my own daughter..."
posted by hegemone at 7:47 AM on May 9, 2010 [4 favorites]
posted by hegemone at 7:47 AM on May 9, 2010 [4 favorites]
The more I think about this, the more I think the protagonist of this movie is going to wind up with a closeted gay man.
posted by Astro Zombie at 8:01 AM on May 9, 2010
posted by Astro Zombie at 8:01 AM on May 9, 2010
I would just like to take this opportunity to say that my first kiss took place when I was about eleven. The kisser was the older sister of a friend. That girl was about fifteen. She was someone who had, I knew, been pregnant and lost the baby, and was impossibly grown-up and exotic, and was basically mindfreaking me. It was awesome. I expect my half of it was not that impressive, really, but suffice it to say: Shut the fuck up, Pamela's creepy dad!
posted by kittens for breakfast at 8:10 AM on May 9, 2010 [3 favorites]
posted by kittens for breakfast at 8:10 AM on May 9, 2010 [3 favorites]
An ex-GF of mine hooked up with the Elizabeth Clair Prophet group, with both feet, and eventually I was invited to her wedding, at this canyon compound outside of San Diego the group had.
Pretty spooky, but nice surroundings. When the vows were exchanged, and the kiss happened, it was revealed that this was their first kiss.
Turns out that ex-GF had decided she wanted kids, and, being sort of up there in the hierarchy, she had the pick of several guys who would be willing to marry her. (Dr. Laura's term of secondary virginity comes to mind although no one had heard of that term then.)
Never saw her again after that day and have no idea what became of this marriage, or any possible offspring. I am better for that unknowing.
posted by Danf at 8:21 AM on May 9, 2010 [1 favorite]
Pretty spooky, but nice surroundings. When the vows were exchanged, and the kiss happened, it was revealed that this was their first kiss.
Turns out that ex-GF had decided she wanted kids, and, being sort of up there in the hierarchy, she had the pick of several guys who would be willing to marry her. (Dr. Laura's term of secondary virginity comes to mind although no one had heard of that term then.)
Never saw her again after that day and have no idea what became of this marriage, or any possible offspring. I am better for that unknowing.
posted by Danf at 8:21 AM on May 9, 2010 [1 favorite]
I went to a Christian school, and I've never met anyone who thought it was wrong to kiss before marriage. One guy thought it was romantic to wait, but he was basically laughed out of that idea.
posted by brenton at 10:09 AM on May 9, 2010 [1 favorite]
posted by brenton at 10:09 AM on May 9, 2010 [1 favorite]
The thing that squeaks me out about not kissing before a wedding is that the couple must go right from kissing to completes sex in just a few hours. So really, they are going to end up rushing through a heck of a lot of fun stuff.
I know a young couple who did this. One kiss when they got engaged, then nothing til the wedding. They have a cute little baby now, and seem very happy.
But I still think he's gay.
posted by SLC Mom at 11:09 AM on May 9, 2010 [2 favorites]
I know a young couple who did this. One kiss when they got engaged, then nothing til the wedding. They have a cute little baby now, and seem very happy.
But I still think he's gay.
posted by SLC Mom at 11:09 AM on May 9, 2010 [2 favorites]
I never did find parts 3-5, and some things are just too pathetic to torrent. However, I DO know what happened to Pamela's mother. She goes into the hospital, hugely pregnant, and the next shot is of Creepy Dad at her grave. Then, a short montage later, he takes his barely toddling 1-year-oldish daughter to toddle around on the grave.
Following the death, he refuses to go to out of town work events because he made a vow to God when mom died that he would pray with his daughter every night, which is when his father (not nearly such a creepy guy), suggests the use of the telephone to do the nightly joint prayer. It took about 1-2 minutes to figure that solution out, with Creepy Dad babbling about his vow the entire time. This vow apparently has no end date, so I can see Creepy Dad going over to Pamela and New Husband's house (assuming they're allowed to have one) to sit on their bed and pray in dim lighting.
Now I've reiterated nearly the entire first third of the movie, except for two parts:
1) When Jerry goes around telling everyone he made out with Pam, Creepy Dad's advice is to "do like Jesus did with Pontius Pilate," and not refute the statement. (I fail to see how everyone is going to know she's still a kiss-virgin if she never actually says anything, but, logic...it has no place.) This was also where the famous quote about how if she'd done what he'd asked this wouldn't've happened, and she asks for his forgiveness. As Jerry could've very well lied about making out even if she was tucked up at home praying, this made no sense, either.
2) Future New Husband Guy apparently goes out of his way to take a Christian video over to some church (this was never explained at all, it just comes back after a montage of Pamela and Creepy Dad praying to see Creepy Dad congratulating New Husband Guy on the successful yet inexplicably dangerous video delivery). Creepy Dad then points out that thanks to that video, four teens were saved after the service that night. He says this in the tone of voice one usually uses for, "the Jaws of Life barely arrived to the car wreck in time."
posted by wending my way at 12:07 PM on May 9, 2010
Following the death, he refuses to go to out of town work events because he made a vow to God when mom died that he would pray with his daughter every night, which is when his father (not nearly such a creepy guy), suggests the use of the telephone to do the nightly joint prayer. It took about 1-2 minutes to figure that solution out, with Creepy Dad babbling about his vow the entire time. This vow apparently has no end date, so I can see Creepy Dad going over to Pamela and New Husband's house (assuming they're allowed to have one) to sit on their bed and pray in dim lighting.
Now I've reiterated nearly the entire first third of the movie, except for two parts:
1) When Jerry goes around telling everyone he made out with Pam, Creepy Dad's advice is to "do like Jesus did with Pontius Pilate," and not refute the statement. (I fail to see how everyone is going to know she's still a kiss-virgin if she never actually says anything, but, logic...it has no place.) This was also where the famous quote about how if she'd done what he'd asked this wouldn't've happened, and she asks for his forgiveness. As Jerry could've very well lied about making out even if she was tucked up at home praying, this made no sense, either.
2) Future New Husband Guy apparently goes out of his way to take a Christian video over to some church (this was never explained at all, it just comes back after a montage of Pamela and Creepy Dad praying to see Creepy Dad congratulating New Husband Guy on the successful yet inexplicably dangerous video delivery). Creepy Dad then points out that thanks to that video, four teens were saved after the service that night. He says this in the tone of voice one usually uses for, "the Jaws of Life barely arrived to the car wreck in time."
posted by wending my way at 12:07 PM on May 9, 2010
The youth groups leaders, who were thankfully aghast at this mentality, tried to reason with him that surely if a young girl was raped, if the "sex" was against her will, surely she could be considered a spiritual virgin, and should not be considered impure. The kid was not to be dissuaded though, he was pretty adamant. He was a really good looking kid but after that, no girl in the youth group ever remotely considered dating him.That's natural selection in action right there, you know? It's one of the reasons I think that movies that encourage people to talk openly about their views are a good thing.
I went to a Christian school, and I've never met anyone who thought it was wrong to kiss before marriage. One guy thought it was romantic to wait, but he was basically laughed out of that idea.Clearly you didn't attend home-schooling conferences.
posted by verb at 8:15 PM on May 9, 2010
which was on a couch, while watching Lock, Stock, and Two Smoking Barrels
You're my hero.
posted by NoraReed at 9:44 AM on May 11, 2010
You're my hero.
posted by NoraReed at 9:44 AM on May 11, 2010
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posted by verb at 8:50 PM on May 8, 2010