"Oh God you guys. This better be pretty freakin' important. Is the meadow on fire?"
October 6, 2010 8:17 AM Subscribe
All About Unicorns. What is a Unicorn? Unicorns in Prehistory. Unicorns in Ancient History. Unicorns in the Middle Ages. Unicorn Legends. East and West. Chinese Unicorns. Unicorns and Warriors. The Lion and the Unicorn. Heraldry. The Alicorn. Pegasus. Unicorn Pictures. Unicorn Books. Unicorn Magic Cards. Unicorn Posters.
One question which I'm guessing these links do not answer: why are kids (especially of the distaff gender) so enamored by unicorns?
posted by kozad at 8:39 AM on October 6, 2010 [1 favorite]
posted by kozad at 8:39 AM on October 6, 2010 [1 favorite]
Ponies + magic, duh.
posted by maryr at 8:40 AM on October 6, 2010 [7 favorites]
posted by maryr at 8:40 AM on October 6, 2010 [7 favorites]
Plus how you can only tame them if you're a virgin. Abstinence is cool.
posted by nobody at 8:47 AM on October 6, 2010 [1 favorite]
posted by nobody at 8:47 AM on October 6, 2010 [1 favorite]
Lots and lots of links to the same web site. Feels like a site dump to me, but I could be wrong.
But hey, I'll add my current omg-wtf-isthat link:
Avenging Unicorn Play set
posted by Old'n'Busted at 8:47 AM on October 6, 2010 [1 favorite]
But hey, I'll add my current omg-wtf-isthat link:
Avenging Unicorn Play set
posted by Old'n'Busted at 8:47 AM on October 6, 2010 [1 favorite]
>One question which I'm guessing these links do not answer: why are kids (especially of the distaff gender) so enamored by unicorns?
Ponies + magic, duh.
I asked my wife the same question less than a week ago, forgetting that unicorns have a magical component. I got nearly that exact response.
posted by Mayor Curley at 8:48 AM on October 6, 2010
Ponies + magic, duh.
I asked my wife the same question less than a week ago, forgetting that unicorns have a magical component. I got nearly that exact response.
posted by Mayor Curley at 8:48 AM on October 6, 2010
My wireless network at home is named "Unicorn Rainbow."
posted by Shohn at 8:48 AM on October 6, 2010 [1 favorite]
posted by Shohn at 8:48 AM on October 6, 2010 [1 favorite]
This dream of unicorns can mean only one thing - the Internet is a robot!
posted by Artw at 8:52 AM on October 6, 2010
posted by Artw at 8:52 AM on October 6, 2010
Curley - my original response was just "Magic, duh." I thought the question required slightly more elaboration.
posted by maryr at 8:52 AM on October 6, 2010
posted by maryr at 8:52 AM on October 6, 2010
How on earth do they only have *one* unicorn book? And it's not The Last Unicorn?!
posted by maryr at 8:53 AM on October 6, 2010
posted by maryr at 8:53 AM on October 6, 2010
Plus how you can only tame them if you're a virgin. Abstinence is cool.
Not sure that explains the similar interest in mermaids, who'll flash their boobs at anyone.
posted by Artw at 8:55 AM on October 6, 2010
Not sure that explains the similar interest in mermaids, who'll flash their boobs at anyone.
posted by Artw at 8:55 AM on October 6, 2010
Not sure that explains the similar interest in mermaids, who'll flash their boobs at anyone.
But can decently go pantsless...
posted by ChurchHatesTucker at 8:57 AM on October 6, 2010
But can decently go pantsless...
posted by ChurchHatesTucker at 8:57 AM on October 6, 2010
Once upon a time, there was a pirate riding on a unicorn, fighting a ninja riding a t-rex. The ninja fired his sharks with frigging lasers, but the pirate blocked it with his steampunk lightsaber. Look at your man, now back to me. The lasers are now bacon. I baked you a cupcake with the bacon but mah kitteh eated it. I was sad until Chuck Norris came and started dancing with a baby and a hampster. O RLY? YA, RLY. I'm 12 and how is babby formed? I kiss you! I put on my robe and fedora. Am I doing this right?
posted by The Winsome Parker Lewis at 8:59 AM on October 6, 2010 [12 favorites]
posted by The Winsome Parker Lewis at 8:59 AM on October 6, 2010 [12 favorites]
I really don't understand how someone can make a post about unicorns and not link to Robot Unicorn Attack.
posted by nooneyouknow at 9:02 AM on October 6, 2010
posted by nooneyouknow at 9:02 AM on October 6, 2010
As magical equines go, I definitely prefer unicorns to pegasus, they stay on the ground and make for an easier to hit target. Plus, once roasted, when you serve them, you can do some amazing things in the presentation with the horn.
And pegasus are really too muscled. It makes them a bit tough.
posted by quin at 9:03 AM on October 6, 2010 [1 favorite]
And pegasus are really too muscled. It makes them a bit tough.
posted by quin at 9:03 AM on October 6, 2010 [1 favorite]
Not sure that explains the similar interest in mermaids, who'll flash their boobs at anyone.
But can decently go pantsless...
Which begs the question top half human/bottom half mermaid or bottom half human/top half fish-mermaid?
posted by Fizz at 9:03 AM on October 6, 2010
But can decently go pantsless...
Which begs the question top half human/bottom half mermaid or bottom half human/top half fish-mermaid?
posted by Fizz at 9:03 AM on October 6, 2010
Not sure that explains the similar interest in mermaids, who'll flash their boobs at anyone.
But mermaids don't have genitals. Like Barbie and Ken, but you don't even notice they're missing.
posted by nobody at 9:08 AM on October 6, 2010
But mermaids don't have genitals. Like Barbie and Ken, but you don't even notice they're missing.
posted by nobody at 9:08 AM on October 6, 2010
I feel compelled to point out Gabe's experience on the subject.
posted by maryr at 9:12 AM on October 6, 2010
posted by maryr at 9:12 AM on October 6, 2010
"A fish everywhere you'd want a woman and a woman everywhere you'd want a fish."
Something in that vein, anyways.
Previously. It's alive! It's ALIVE!
posted by tspae at 9:45 AM on October 6, 2010
Something in that vein, anyways.
Previously. It's alive! It's ALIVE!
posted by tspae at 9:45 AM on October 6, 2010
I just visited the Unicorn room in the Cloisters. It is awesome, and sadly violent.
posted by milestogo at 10:26 AM on October 6, 2010
posted by milestogo at 10:26 AM on October 6, 2010
In the swinger culture single, bi females are called Unicorns.
posted by MajorDilemma at 10:33 AM on October 6, 2010
posted by MajorDilemma at 10:33 AM on October 6, 2010
The Winsome Parker Lewis: "Once upon a time, there was a pirate riding on a unicorn, fighting a ninja riding a t-rex. The ninja fired his sharks with frigging lasers, but the pirate blocked it with his steampunk lightsaber. Look at your man, now back to me. The lasers are now bacon. I baked you a cupcake with the bacon but mah kitteh eated it. I was sad until Chuck Norris came and started dancing with a baby and a hampster. O RLY? YA, RLY. I'm 12 and how is babby formed? I kiss you! I put on my robe and fedora. Am I doing this right?"
You forgot "FAKE" but otherwise god damn you sounded just like a 12yr old on 4-chan.
Well done.
posted by Bonzai at 12:05 PM on October 6, 2010
You forgot "FAKE" but otherwise god damn you sounded just like a 12yr old on 4-chan.
Well done.
posted by Bonzai at 12:05 PM on October 6, 2010
What I want to know is how fluffy are these unicorns?
posted by zorrine at 2:35 PM on October 6, 2010
posted by zorrine at 2:35 PM on October 6, 2010
My favorite unicorn story, form Umberto Eco: Marco Polo goes to Java, and sees a one horned horse, and figures, hey, it's a unicorn. It was a rhinoceros. Marco Polo wasn't a dummy, because he had to make a choice: either he modified his understanding of unicorn to fit the animal in front of him, or else he would have to believe he discovered an entirely unknown animal.
We make a similar choice every day, about everything.
posted by TheLastPsychiatrist at 3:22 PM on October 6, 2010
We make a similar choice every day, about everything.
posted by TheLastPsychiatrist at 3:22 PM on October 6, 2010
Might I highly recommend the Killer Unicorn books? I'm reading Ascendant right now.
posted by jenfullmoon at 3:55 PM on October 6, 2010
posted by jenfullmoon at 3:55 PM on October 6, 2010
nitsuj: "I thought we were still on bacon"
Mmmmm unicorn bacon...
posted by Splunge at 4:28 PM on October 6, 2010
Mmmmm unicorn bacon...
posted by Splunge at 4:28 PM on October 6, 2010
maryr: "How on earth do they only have *one* unicorn book?"
I noticed that too, and it kind of sullied my opinion of the whole website. But I still like unicorns. And bunnies. And butterflies.
posted by gubenuj at 5:07 PM on October 6, 2010
I noticed that too, and it kind of sullied my opinion of the whole website. But I still like unicorns. And bunnies. And butterflies.
posted by gubenuj at 5:07 PM on October 6, 2010
Hmmm, the Unicorn Tapestries... memorable, memorable article.
posted by paperpete at 1:40 PM on October 7, 2010
posted by paperpete at 1:40 PM on October 7, 2010
A Journal of Certain Events of Scientific Interest from the First Survey Voyage of the Southern Waters by HMS Ocelot, As Observed by Professor Thaddeus Boswell, DPhil, MSc
-or-
A Lullaby
posted by Artw at 4:24 PM on October 7, 2010
-or-
A Lullaby
posted by Artw at 4:24 PM on October 7, 2010
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posted by Scoo at 8:30 AM on October 6, 2010